nf Page 1004 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
MMA Fighter Has A More Racist Fantasy Football Team Than You
A small confession: I have often dreamed of creating a fantasy basketball team composed exclusively of players with the surnames Jefferson and Jackson. (The team, obviously, would be called the Jefferson-Jacksons, in reference, obviously, to the nascence of the Democratic Party.) Never have I dreame...
Fred Taylor Retires A Jaguar, But How Much Does His One-Day Contract Pay?
"There are no dumb questions." That was a promising way for the Jaguars' representative to open the conversation when he returns my call regarding what I presumed was a dumb, dumb question....
Whoever Broke Into Chris Cooley's Art Gallery Did Not Care Much For The Art
Local police in Leesburg, Va. are searching for the suspect that broke into Chris Cooley's art gallery on South King Street early Friday morning. Thankfully, no art or pottery was stolen in the burglary. More importantly, though, Chris Cooley owns an art gallery....
Matt Cassel's Burden Is Heavier Than Anyone Imagined
Your morning roundup for Sept. 2, the day after we didn't have any change to toss into Bruce Springsteen's guitar case. Photo courtesy @IndianPacker, via @Sportsfeeder1. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Gael Monfils Took The Tennis Trick Shot To A New Level Today
Monfils and Juan Carlos Ferrero are currently deadlocked in the second round at the U.S. Open. Ferrero took the first set, 7-6 (5), Monfils took the second at 7-5, and Ferrero is up 6-5 in the third. Monfils, though, got the psychological (and bullshit) advantage with this trick shot early on....
Michael Vick's $100 Million Contract Is A Lie
Everything you need to know about the NFL and its courtier press can be summed up in a single sentence: Michael Vick's much-heralded "$100 million deal" is not a $100 million deal, and the widely reported "$40 million guaranteed" is in fact neither $40 million nor completely guaranteed. ...
Terrelle Pryor's Wonderlic Score Was Reportedly A 7 (UPDATE: Pryor Says 22)
The Raiders are praying that Terrelle Pryor's football IQ is higher than his actual IQ. According to Bob McGinn, the Packers beat writer for the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, Pryor scored a whopping 7 on his Wonderlic Test. (UPDATE: See below.)...
You Still Can't Look At A Danny Woodhead Press Conference Photo Without Thinking "Awww..."
Don't worry: Danny says his head still feels fine and he will scamper his way into the back-pocket of America again real soon. Aww. [Rich Eisen]...
SF Giants Payroll Manager Caught Embezzling After She Gave Herself A $300k World Series Bonus Despite Her $80k Salary
File this one under stupid (alleged) criminals who are also world champions: The KGO-TV I-Team has more....
The NFL Network Cannot Locate New York City On A Map
This is from tonight's NFL Total Access, and we borrowed reader Schnu's comment for the headline, since it seemed particularly appropriate....
Terrell Owens, NFL Receiver Whom No Team Wants, Can Find Comfort In Support From Lisa Leslie
That's praise on your work ethic from a three-time MVP, T.O. She has two championships. Why can't the girl get an RT? [Twitter]...
This Evening: The Giant Fish Tank That Doubles As A Headboard On Chad Ochocinco's Bed
Your p.m. roundup for Aug. 30, the day we learned you weren't comfortable knowing you were our masturbation fodder. Photo courtesy Shutdown Corner, via Sportress of Blogitude. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Why The 1991 Saints Dropped Their Lame "Cha-Ching" Catchphrase
The New Orleans Saints won their first division title in 1991, which is weird both because the Saints had been around for more than two decades before that point and because the 1991 Saints were a weird team. They were 11-5. Steve Walsh and Bobby Hebert split time at QB, and neither played well. Gil...
Ed Hochuli Says The Beach Is *Flexes* THATAWAY
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the muscliest of refs talks about the new rule changes....
Peyton Hillis: Not A Great Tipper
We were sent the business half of this receipt, purporting to show Cleveland wunderwhite Peyton Hillis's sub-10% tip. The sender-inner will only say that this went down at a "nice" restaurant, but a $105 bill is pretty paltry compared to others we've seen. Maybe it's "Ohio nice."...
Jeremy Shockey Saves Choking Teammate
Lots of words might come to mind when you think of Jeremy Shockey: thug, crybaby, and even choker. But lifesaver, trachea-clearer—those are new for Shockey....
Tennis Players Awkwardly Navigate The Post-Match Kiss
Gael Monfils beat Grigor Dimitrov in the opening round of the US Open last night, 7-6 (4), 6-3, 6-4, and then met at the net for the most awkward kiss since middle school. (Although it is certainly possible that it only seems that way to unsophisticated Americans like us.)...
NFL Will Kick Off Exciting New Season With Worst Concert Of All Time
"Kid Rock, Lady Antebellum and Maroon 5 will play the 'NFL Kickoff 2011' concert outside Lambeau Field before the Green Bay Packers' Sept. 8 opener against the New Orleans Saints." [AP]...
Why Is Bill Belichick Stockpiling Mediocre Former Jets This Offseason?
The Patriots have a thing for acquiring former Jets to play small roles on their team. (The Jets sometimes do the same thing.) We wonder why....
Cedric Benson Will Spend His Bye Week In Jail
Last summer in Austin, Cedric Benson got into a bar fight that we'll rate 0.2 Jordan Jeffersons. He shoved some workers and threw a punch, and was arrested for misdemeanor assault. Today he paid the piper, pleading no contest and being sentenced to 20 days in jail....