nf Page 1068 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
NFL Wants To Take Hard-Earned Money From All Those Players Who Shoot Themselves In Bars Or Something
NFL executive vice president Jeff Pash has some serious problems with the current collective bargaining agreement, foremost being that all those football players shooting themselves in bars get to keep their signing bonuses. Outrage!...
Minor League Baseball Will Be HGH Testing's Beachhead
We never thought we'd see the day, but an American professional sport has taken steps to detect, punish and deter HGH usage. Effective immediately, Minor League Baseball will test for it. This is big for our friends in the NFL, as well....
How Would You Like This Oily, Tan Woman In A Bikini To Flirt With You On Facebook?
Then you should join the Deadspin Facebook group because it gives you the opportunity to converse with like-minded sports culture enthusiasts and you might just meet a fun person to have virtual sexting with. For real. Look....
A Fantasy Football Screwjob We Can All Enjoy
The heartwarming tale of a non-fan invited to a draft and given a player list from 2005. He ended up with Priest Holmes, Marvin Harrison, Torry Holt and Steve McNair. But not Brett Favre, because he was retired. [Couch Groove Football]...
Dodgers Lose Another One, This Time To The Rulebook
We love it when a manager uses the rulebook to his advantage. Bruce Bochy caught acting Dodgers manager Don Mattingly inadvertently stepping off the mound during the visit to his pitcher, and the resulting nitpick gave the Giants a victory....
Jimmy Johnson To Make Tropical Paradise Hell For Other People On <em>Survivor</em>
Perhaps confident that ExtenZe All-Natural Male Enhancement tablets can sell themselves, Johnson is exiling himself to Nicaragua for the next season of Survivor....
<em>Major League</em> Manager Dies
James Gammon—the manager from Major League and a lot of other stuff—died over the weekend after a long battle with cancer. Everybody smoke a pack of Marlboro Reds and talk like him in his honor. [Backstage]...
Ochocinco. Gambling. In His Briefs. Sure, Why Not.
Chad appears to be having a grand old time in Vegas. Just don't ask where he keeps his roll of quarters. [Twitter]...
Mark Chmura, Former Tight End, Lover Of Teenage Hot-Tub Parties, To Be Inducted Into Packer Hall Of Fame
He will be inducted Saturday night: "I had to grow up," said Chmura, who was acquitted in 2001 of child enticement and third-degree sexual assault charges stemming from a high school postprom party he attended in suburban Milwaukee."[WisconsinRapidsTribune]...
When World Cup Third-Place Final Celebrations Go Wrong
Remember kids: buckle up for safety. Especially when your mate is a flash twat with a sensitive accelerator pedal....
Last Night's Winner: Brett Favre's Unsmiling Daughter
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Breleigh Ann Favre, 11-year-old spawn of Brett, unamused ESPYs guest, symbol of a disgruntled sports nation....
When Gary Carter Gets Into It With A Child, You Know Security's Going To Get Involved
I can't really blame Carter here. He knows the rules about only signing specific items, and so does the "fan" who baits him. Poor kid: in one day he learns that ballplayers can be mean, and that his dad's a douche. [Via]...
Would You Like To Have Hot Sex With Strangers You Meet On Facebook?
Then you should join the Deadspin Facebook page, which is quickly turning into the world's premiere online orgy. Look at that — more than 7,000 hot and horny people just waiting to Like your stuff. You know you want in....
Pro Football Hall Of Fame Awards, Woooop, Slide Back, Back, Back Into Irrelevance
Awful, awful leatherhead Chris Berman is the recipient of this year's Pete Rozelle Radio-Television Award, an award that had been previously given to actual sportscasters like Pat Summerall for their "exceptional contributions" to TV pigskin. World, stop honoring this man....
FMK: Ichiro, Werth, Strawberry
I've fielded kyuu or juu tips-emails about this video of Blossoming Young Lady Giddying Up After Ichiro Elbows Her Face, Caresses Her Outer Thigh....
Here's Something To Ease You Off Your Fear Of Clowns
This Juarez street clown was arrested Wednesday on an alleged sexual assault charge filed by his teenage stepdaughter. Freaky, yes, but not as freaky as the Phil Spector mug shot. [The Smoking Gun]...
Chad Ochocinco Is Looking For A Classy Broad
On his reality dating show: "I don't have nobody to cook for me. I don't have nobody to go to McDonald's with, or to take to the high-end restaurants like Red Lobster." [Dan Patrick Show]...
Surveying The Wreckage Of The Matt Millen Era
Today, the Lions released Daniel Bullocks, the last player remaining from a 5-year stretch of drafts. That's 0-for-40. Here's what became of them all, and I warn you, it's not pretty....
FIST-EXPLOSION: LEBRON STAYING IN CLEVELAND, SAYS..."CUBES"
"Which is exactly why I think he is going back to the Cavs. The sports world is full of uncertainties. When in doubt, go for the love." [BlogMaverick, artwork via 9GAG]...
BREAKING: GREENWICH ABSOLUTELY SWARMING WITH PEOPLE JUST SORT OF MILLING AROUND
Our man in Connecticut, Craig Fehrman, took this photo a couple hours ago across the street from the Greenwich Boys and Girls Club. Craig reports: "The only fans there were that kid and a parental-looking figure [in the Cavs jersey], who was spelling his last name like a pro."...