nf Page 1079 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Tiger Woods: "I Felt I Was Entitled"
It's hard to single out one defining moment in a 13-minute speech, but I think the clubhouse leader might be Tiger Woods saying that he felt he "deserved to enjoy all the temptations" around him. Eww....

Tiger Woods Press Conference: Open Thread
Give your witticisms a workout as Tiger reads from a script pulled from the sex addiction handbook. In case you're not near a television, watch it here....

Michael Jordan To Attend Tiger Woods Press Conference? (UPDATE)
Oh...GET THE F OUT. As if this whole thing already wasn't one big giant sham, according to a report from WEEI, Michael Jordan will be in attendance at Tiger's 11 a.m. press conference....

Last Night's Winner: The Golf Writers Association Of America
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like American golf scribes, who defiantly removed their lips from the tainted buttocks of Tiger Woods and decided to collectively boycott today's "press conference."...

StarCaps Case Takes Heller-esque Turn
A judge says that for Kevin and Pat Williams's cases to proceed, they have to prove they are employed by the NFL, while the league maintains they are solely Vikings employees. Does Deadspin LLP care to weigh in? [Star Tribune]...

Douchial Profiling: Cowboys Fan Searched At Philly Airport
It takes a certain kind of person to wear a Cowboys jersey around Philadelphia the week after Dallas knocked the Eagles out of the playoffs. A terroristic kind of person? Without knowing all the facts, we say: probably....

The Tiger Woods Guide To Post-Scandal Press Conferences
No one knows what Tiger Woods will say or do tomorrow, but no matter what happens it will go down in the annals of classic public apologies. Here's a look at some of the legends of the genre....

Tiger Woods Will Apologize, Explain Himself On Friday To Friends And "Pool Of Reporters"
11 a.m. at PGA Tour headquarters. That's when Woods will re-emerge in public for the first time, according to Bloomberg....

Donte' Stallworth Signs With Ravens
But 59-year-old Mario Reyes is still dead. Peter King reports....

Raiders Taking "Football" Literally
Oakland made Sebastian Janikowski the highest-paid kicker, to go along with their punter's record deal. Because when you can't score and can't stop anyone from scoring, might as well throw money at special teams. [Oakland Tribune]...

Barry Melrose Shares The Secret To Smooth Canadian Skin: "Chickenshit"
Here's Melrose on ESPN's First Take, explaining how he keeps away the crow's feet. Dana Jacobson later apologized, because god forbid someone say "chickenshit" on a show that's basically the television equivalent of smearing our faces in bird crap. [YouBeenBlinded.com]...

Peter King Is Already Manufacturing Dumb Storylines For the 2010 Season
"The logical question for the Saints: Is all this celebrating and spate of parades ... going to go on so long that they affect the Saints' ability to repeat in 2010?" That question leads the league in stupid. [SI.com]...

Oprah Winfrey Mistakes Drew Brees' Birthmark For Lipstick
"Who just kissed you?" she asked. "God," he should have said, before punching her. [Sporting Blog]...

Saints Begin A Losing Battle Against Bandwagon Allegations
The Times-Picayune put out a call for these fans that were joined by Reggie Bush on Sunday. Problem: it's Brody Jenner and his L.A. posse. [NO T-P]...

Because Winning And Staying Out Of Jail Were Getting Boring In Cincy
Troubled receiver Matt Jones will join the Troubled Bengals, who are also working out troubled corner Pacman Jones. And of course, T.O. rumors persist. Someone tell Mike Brown that "Hard Knocks" won't put the same team on twice. [Cincinnati Enquirer]...

Rex Ryan's Wardrobe Malfunction
When asking Rex Ryan to change into a Hurricanes jersey, please provide him a changing room. The former Whalers almost provided us with a breast bonanza. [TBL]...

You Saw It Yesterday During the Big Game: Dante's Inferno
In Dante's Inferno, Dante must save the hotness (puns!) that is Beatrice from the eternal torture of becoming Satan's betrothed by diving into the pit of hell and battling every nasty beast he encounters, including Cerberus and Phlegyas. Trailer after the jump!...

Before The Spectacle, A Reminder Of What It's About
Please go read the story of Dexter Manley, his addiction, and the man to whom he entrusted his Super Bowl ring to protect it from his demons. [Houston Chronicle]...

Right On Schedule, Here's The "Kid Teased For His Loyalty" Article
I feel like we get this story four times a year (once for each sport), but let's be dutiful bloggers and tell you about the Colts fan who got sent home from school during a Saints rally. Sigh....

Reggie Bush's Self-Proclaimed Jump-Off Would Like To Show You Some Proof
The woman who claims she came between Reggie and Kim Kardashian has released a video of her in a bikini at Bush's home. Also, she's gotten a creepily Kim K-like makeover. Fatal Attraction stuff, after the jump....