nf Page 1079 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Last Night's Winner: Steeler Pride
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the good of people of Pittsburgh, who don't stand for miscreants, rabble rousers, or hippies. Plus, their heroes very rarely get charged with crimes....

Confirmed: Terrence Austin May Or May Not Be An NFL Draft Prospect
I bet I know what you're thinking right now. What NFL team will draft UCLA's 2nd all-time yardage leader, Terrence Austin? I was right, wasn't I? Thanks to this bizarre, sort-of-informative press release I cannot now give you the answer!...

Jeremy Shockey Is Looking For Love In All The Wrong Places
I.e., on Facebook and Twitter. Shockey is holding a contest for women (he emphasizes the "female" part) to submit a video explaining why he should take them out on a date. This won't end well. [via Chicks In The Huddle]...

Implosion Destructo-Porn: Texas Stadium Edition
Preceded by fireworks (and onlookers paying an admission fee), the 39-year-old Texas Stadium was reduced to rubble this morning. Jerry Jones is a secular Shiva: destroying, in order to re-create....

Santonio Holmes Probably Going To Sit A Few Out
Santonio Holmes is facing a suspension for violating the NFL's substance abuse policy. As the exact reason for the suspension is not yet known, wildly unfounded speculation is welcome below. [PFT]...

Drew Brees Plays Dress-Up With the US Marine Corps
Drew Brees visited Marines in Djibouti on a recent USO tour and got to play with their toys. He's a sharpshooter, etc. [New Orleans Times-Picayune]...

Lou Piniella Bawls Out With His Balls Out
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

The San "Francicso" Giants Need Spellcheck
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Jets' Courtship Of Jason Taylor Is Pissing Everyone Off
Taylor's in town to meet with Rex Ryan and company. Dolphins fans are apoplectic. Jets fans are inconsolable. This is pretty much a win-win situation for everyone....

Old Man Favre Becomes A Grandpa
Favre's daughter Brittany gave birth to Parker Brett, who won't make a decision on whether or not to return to the womb until August. [Star Trib]...

Your UConn Looks Mortal Open Thread
That 77-game streak looks to be in jeopardy, as the Huskies trail Stanford 20-12 at the half. (Yes, they are using a shot clock.) Discuss in the comments, if you are so inclined. [Update: UConn wins. Try not to riot.]...

Tiger Ingratiates Himself One First Name At A Time
Tiger's working really hard to get back into the public's good graces. Kicking off his comeback with that softball interview and a trip to the media-light Masters tournament were great ideas. Though everyone wants to bother him, no one will....

The Gus Johnson Megamix: A Special Deadspin Films Presentation
The last few weeks, Gus Johnson has been a hot topic. His zany witticisms and unbridled enthusiasm have made a memorable NCAA Tournament that much more memorable. The outpouring of support for Gus was enormous. Consider:...

Giants' Giant Coke Bottle Is A Death Trap
Yet another person is suing the Giants and Coca-Cola after being injured on the slide in the outfield. Let's take a ride through the belly of the beast....

If There's A Gremlin On The Wing, Shaun Rogers Is Your Man
That gun in Rogers's carry-on luggage? It was already cocked, with a full magazine and a bullet in the chamber. Somebody's seen Passenger 57 too many times. [Plain Dealer]...

BREAKING: Top NFL Draft Picks Make Too Much Money
"Although the value of players declines throughout the draft, quality declines more slowly than compensation ... the first pick in the draft is, on average, the least valuable in the entire first round." [NY Times, via NPR]...

Donovan McNabb Wins The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Redskins quarterback (wow) Donovan McNabb, who stole a busy weekend show when he suddenly turned the tables on Philadelphia and became Bizarro Brett Favre....

Look At All The Pretty Pictures: The iPad-Friendly Deadspin
Hello Saturday afternoon lurkers. If you go to beta.deadspin.com (and beta.gizmodo.com) you'll get a glimpse into the future. Express your feelings in the comments, please. Your feedback is encouraged. Even if it's profane....

Redskins Have The Strangest Backfield Ever
Washington signs Willie Parker, planning to run the exclusive three-RB formation, in which he, Portis and Johnson line up, only to watch Jason Campbell doink the ball into the turf four yards from the line of scrimmage. [AP]...