nf Page 1122 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

A Most Distressing Video: Joe Martinez Takes Line Drive Off The Head
This is not the kind of thing that people wanted to see in the wake of the tragic Nick Adenhart accident. That was one brutal line drive....

Your Frozen Four Preview (Settle Down, Everyone)
Did someone say BEMIDJI?! College hockey's national semifinals are tonight and these folks will explain it to you. They make giant beavers out of snow in Bemidji, Minnesota. [Rumors and Rants; Hoover Street Rag; Randball]...

All Right, I'll Attend Your Stinking Workouts
After saying that he wouldn't attend the Bills' voluntary offseason conditioning program because it was, well, voluntary, Terrell Owens changes his mind and shows up on Wednesday. [The Buffalo News]...

San Francisco Giants Advertising Copy Written By Giggling 12-Year-Olds
The Giants marketing department will apparently just write anything down on a piece of paper and consider their jobs done. Please leave all "ball"-based puns to the professionals. [Big League Stew]...

Why Do The Mets Hate Children?
There was a time when the New York Mets welcomed young children into their stadium with open arms, but now that they're in a new clean stadium and not some old junkyard....screw those kids....

Lions Take Stafford At No. 1. Rams, You Are Now On The Clock
At least that's what Pro Football Talk is reporting, with the caveat that interest in the Georgia QB may just be a clever smokescreen (ha ha, but anyway ...). [Pro Football Talk]...

Tank Johnson Is Obviously Confident That He's A Changed Man
The former Bear/Cowboy/convict has just signed a one year deal with...the Cincinnati Bengals. [ESPN]...

NFL Prospects: If You Don't Want To Damage Your Draft Position, Keep Your Dirty Details Off The Internet
Here's a fascinating story from Yahoo!'s Charles Robinson about how some NFL teams create phony social networking accounts to do some clandestine character background checks of potential draft picks. This is what we hath wrought....

OK You Pissants, Make Way For Randy Johnson
There's been little wailing and no gnashing of teeth in the Bay Area over Tim Lincecum's underwhelming '09 debut on Tuesday. That's because A. The Giants won, and B. Their headliner is actually starting tonight....

I See No Negative Safety Implications Here
If there's one thing I'm sure of, it's that the new Indoor Football League is completely safe for both players and fans. But then I'm still holding on to Enron stock....

Martellus Bennett's Blog Is A Thing Of Beauty
Martellus Bennett (no relation) is best known for his fine performance on HBO's Hard Knocks and his ability to rhyme "Romo" with "homo." Now he's a blogger....and he is awesome at it....

The Prodigal Son Returns, Kind Of
Former Gilroy High, San Jose State and San Francisco 49ers QB Jeff Garcia, 39, is now an Oakland Raider, and may challenge DeMarcus Russell for the starting role. Good one, Al. [San Francisco Chronicle]...

Maybe B.J. Raji Isn't A Dopehead
Oh, anonymous sources ... you've done it again. Those crazy "web logs" have reported that at least six football players failed pre-draft drug tests, which the players naturally deny. So whose pants are on fire?...

Leave Tony Romo Alone! (Sob) He's A Human Being!
Eminem is back after a two-year hiatus (I know you've been waiting), and his new single, We Made You, should horrify Cowboys fans. Will the indignities never end for Tony Romo?...

Brother, Can You Spare A Horn Section?
Bemidji State has to borrow George Mason's pep band for the Frozen Four this weekend. They would have brought their own, but they had to save up money for skate rentals. [D.C. Sports Bog]...

Who's The Highest Paid Tight End In NFL History?
That's right. That guy. That Vin Diesel-looking dude. The one with the injury problems and the staph infection. That guy. [SI]...

Plaxico Burress Just Not Caring About Anything Anymore
Plaxico Burress has obviously just given up on obeying any authority figure ever. Just days after the Giants finally dumped him, comes words of another run-in with police that did not end happily for anyone....

Book Excerpts That Don't Suck: Faith And Fear In Flushing
Sigh. Here we go. "Faith And Fear In Flushing: An Intense Personal History Of The New York Mets" is not a book I'd promote on this site unless it was really, really good....

Tom And Gisele's Shotgun Wedding
"Two freelance photographers who snapped pics of Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen's weekend wedding in Costa Rica say they were shot at by the supermodel's security personnel." And they didn't even get cake! [Boston Globe]...

Brian Dawkins To Make His Biggest Fan Whole
Brian Dawkins indirectly cost Eagles superfan Dan Leone his job and Dawkins is going to make up for that in big way. A pair of tickets should cover it, right?...