nf Page 1122 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Maybe She's Calling Sidney Crosby A Pelvis
Wow. Fun day for everybody involved. Let's just shut this down and consider this your open thread for the evening. Talk about hockey. Basketball. Baseball. AthleteTweets.com Your decreased wallet size. Your small intestine. Rainbows. Ponies....
Tony Gonzalez Is The New Falconer
Kansas City sends Tony Gonzalez to Atlanta and Matt Ryan for a 2010 second-round pick. You weren't using that were you, Matt Cassel? (Yes, two Falconer references in one day! I win $5!) [USA Today]...
Crack The F—king Skye. Your 2009 NFL Draft Jamboroo
The NFL Draft is this weekend, so time for a special offseason edition of Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo. Enjoy....
Martellus Bennett Wants To Know Why He Loves Chicken So Much
Everyone's favorite Cowboy blogger has been off for a week, but he came back with an important post that will surely further a difficult, but necessary debate—why do black people love the fried chicken?...
Detroit's Likely No. 1 Pick May Suffer From Dementia
The Lions are working hard to ink a deal before Saturday's draft with Georgia QB Matthew Stafford—who "indicated he would love to play in Detroit." That's your first warning sign right there. [ESPN]...
Jimmy Smith Is Not Handling Retirement So Well
Former Jacksonville Jaguar star Jimmy Smith was pulled over for a minor traffic violation yesterday and ended up in jail on cocaine possession charges. That's not what I call enjoying your golden years....
Percy Harvin, Brandon Tate Caught In Draft Drug Sting
Just because B.J. Raji is clean that doesn't mean that there aren't other pro prospects who like the wacky weed. [Fox Sports]...
Goodell Wants Michael Vick To Say He's Sorry
"Does he understand the mistakes he made and is he genuine and have remorse for those actions and is he prepared to handle himself differently going forward? That will ultimately be my decision." [USA Today]...
William "Refrigerator" Perry In The Hospital
The Fridge is expected to recover, but is suffering from Guillain-Barre Syndrome, "a chronic inflammation disorder of the peripheral nerves" and also something that doctors call "Shuffleitis." [Sun-Times]...
For Great Quality At A Low, Low Price, Come On Down During Aaron Curry Discount Days
Aaron Curry is shopping himself to the Lions via text message — which technically is SPAM — telling general manager Martin Mayhew he can be had for a song if he chooses him No. 1....
Jim McMahon Is The "MVP Of The Bedroom"
It's come to this: The former Bears quarterback has become a pitchman for a mysterious sex drug. [WGN Morning News]...
Druggie NFL Prospects Not Actually On Drugs
Remember all the fuss recently about certain draft prospects who tested positive for drugs at the scouting combine and how it made everyone sad for today's youth? Yeah, none of those guys actually tested positive....
"Moneyball" Author Has A Small Penis, Cruel Family
"Daddy has a small penis!" That's according to his toddler daughter, who likes to let everyone at her day care center know that fact about her father. [NYP]...
This New Detroit Lion Logo Should Fix Everything
The rumors are true. It seems that the new Lions logo that "leaked" awhile back is legit and a new typeface and squiggly lines will soon usher in a glorious new era of Detroit football....
Heavyweight David Haye Prefers Subtlety In His Wardrobe Choices
How to make headlines at a German boxing press conference: wear a t-shirt emblazoned with a cartoonish version of yourself holding up the bloody heads of the Klitschko brothers. [Josh Q. Public]...
On Juiced Balls and Homer-Happy Yankee Stadium
Earlier today, Ryan Garko sent an A.J. Burnett fastball in the direction of Bear Mountain, the 19th homer in four games at the giant ATM known as Yankee Stadium. Is this "Coors Field East"?...
The Ravens' Scientific Approach To NFL Draft, Food
Baltimore director of player personnel Eric DeCosta: "We even grade our lunches. If I say it's a 6.2 lunch — all the guys know what that means, pretty good, but not great." [NYT]...
ESPN Has Found A Replacement For Emmitt Smith...Matt Millen
While ESPN de-bloats, they wouldn't be the WWL unless they also added a big name. The biggest one so far: Matt Millen, Ex-Lions GM/Architect of Destruction, will join their Monday Night Countdown on-site team....
Rory Fanning Walks The Walk
I imagine that most of us have walked 3,000 miles in our lifetimes, but not in a straight line, and not all at once. If you happen to see Rory Fanning today, say hi....
Jake Plummer, High School Football Coach
He wouldn't play for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, but Jake Plummer will coach at Sandpoint High School in Idaho this coming fall. [Idaho Statesman]...