nf Page 1208 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
But Trent Edwards Holds No Touchdown Records
Bills 17, Jets 14 — The J.P. Losman era in Buffalo might go the way of William Henry Harrison after Trent Edwards' surprising 22-for-28, 234-yard performance. Jets fans are dismayed that their team lost, but encouraged that it was Chad Pennington's fault, since his last-ditch effort at the end the g...
Hoo Boy, Those Ravens Are Not Skilled At Football
Son of a Travis Henry, these Week 4 games are starting off boring. Let's check how each game stood at halftime, because that's how the other weekend guys were doing it, I think:...
Non-Football Sports On TV (And NFL Coverage Maps)
• 12 noon — Golf: Presidents Cup, Final Round [NBC] • 1:00 p.m. — Bowling: Women's U.S. Open [ESPN] • 1:00 p.m. — Movie: Top Gun [Spike] • 2:00 p.m. — NASCAR: LifeLock 400, at Kansas Speedway [ABC] • 2:00 p.m. — MLB: Braves at Astros [TBS] • 2:00 p.m. — MLB: Tigers at White Sox [WGN]...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while taking too much delight in telling your college friends that your old girlfriend is pregnant ... • NHL: Kings oppress Ducks in jolly old England, tax them without representation. • Boxing: Kelly Pavlik salivates once he hears the KO bell. • Women's World Cup: American women sco...
Show 'Em Your O-Face, Brian
We hope you're excited, Bears fans; as The Sports Hernia points out, You now have Bill Lumbergh as your starting quarterback. Yeah ... we're gonna go ahead and have you play on New Years Eve this year, Rex ......
It's An Exciting Time In The World Of Sports-Themed Beverages
As detailed yesterday, carbonated beverage lovers were overjoyed to see Jones Soda roll out five new exciting flavors based on the Seattle Seahawks, all based on things found in Holmgren's mustache. The flavors: Natural Field Turf Soda (featuring Josh Brown), Sports Cream Soda (featuring Matt Hassel...
Ookie Is No Dummy
Ladies and gentlepeople, we have finally figured out what we will do if we are ever convicted of a felony, other than "try to grow a mustache and move to Turks and Caicos." We're gonna make sure we smoke as much weed as possible, and then get caught....
Bring Your Umbrellas To Paul Brown Stadium On Monday
There might be no better metaphor for the beginning of the Cincinnati Bengals' season than the fact that fans have been noticing bird poop in their beers....
Drink Up, Sports Fans
In the tradition of Michael Jordan (or Derek Jeter) cologne comes a flavor of Jones Soda that's designed to make your mouth a-water: It's perspiration soda....
Drew's Guide To The Proper NFL Viewing Position
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon....
Goodbye, Barry! Goodbye! We Love You! (Leave, Already)
Rick Chandler, San Franciscan, Giants fan and associate editor of this here site, muses on Barry Bonds' last home game as a Giant....
Ladies, Line Up For Roy Williams
Lions wide receiver Roy Williams is making $1,515,000 this year, which is actually a little less than you might think, considering Jon Kitna is being paid $5 million. Therefore, Williams, under such obvious financial constraints, has to keep a close eye on his bottom line. That is to say: He's amazi...
Barry's Final San Francisco Goodbye
Whether it's fair or not, there's only one baseball place on earth where Barry Bonds is beloved: AT&T Park in San Francisco. And tonight's the last night he'll ever be able to bask in that love....
Brett Favre, On The Edge Of History
This week, in Minnesota, Brett Favre is likely to break Dan Marino's record for most career touchdowns, notching 421. This will give him a one-touchdown lead and, of course, a one-Super Bowl lead. But we always forget: Favre is on the precipice of another record Sunday as well....
God Apologizes For Helping Kitna
Lions quarterback Jon Kitna, just eight wins away from that preseason prediction, claimed last week that God healed his concussion, allowing him to play last week against the Eagles. You might have wondered what God thought about this. Well, Sportsline's Clay Travis has talked to God, and he's sorry...
BREAKING: Ron Mexico Smokes Pot!
So this is gonna blow your mind, folks: A couple of weeks ago, when matters might have been somewhat stressful for Michael Vick, he ... tested positive for marijuana. You think you know a guy....
The Norv Turner Hall Of Horrors
We hate to harp on this whole Norv Turner thing — really! — but when we were looking for a picture to go with MJD's Smorgasbord column this week, we knew we wouldn't have to search long to find an anguished photo of Norv. We think it was already on every other site anyway....
ESPN's Disastrous "Town Hall Meeting"
We didn't watch ESPN's timely Michael Vick Town Hall Meeting last night, but from just about every account, it was a total disaster. The audience was so partisan for Vick — which, to be fair, is the opposite of what you typically see — that anyone who so much as pointed out that Vick confessed to el...