nf Page 427 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Put Alex Jones In The Booth For <i>Monday Night Football</i>, Cowards
When ESPN made Rush Limbaugh a part of their Sunday NFL Countdown flagship back in 2003, the country was a different place. Everything that is currently bad and dumb about these United States was already very much in evidence, if maybe not quite in its current state of roaring psychedelic metastasis...
Report: Raiders Give 10-Year Contract To Guy Who Hasn't Coached Since 2009
ESPN might not be the first stop for sports highlights, but it’s apparently the place to poach vintage coaching talent. Multiple outlets have reported that Monday Night Football analyst Jon Gruden is set to finally make his rumored move to become the next head coach of the Raiders. Contract details...
All The Nasty Tricks MRSA Uses To Fuck You Up
Today’s column is about skin-colonizing bacteria....
Brady, Belichick, And Kraft Stop Feuding Long Enough To Put Out A Statement About How They're Not Feuding
The hot Patriots gossip is here and everyone loves it, because there is something undeniably hilarious about the best quarterback in NFL history teaming up with the real-life Dr. Nick and sabotaging the future of his own franchise. What’s also hilarious: this joint statement from Tom Brady, Bill Bel...
Here Is My 49er-centric Conspiracy Theory About The Patriots Drama
Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the lord, and it looks like Jimmy Garoppolo in a 49ers uniform. For the first time since Jim Harbaugh was canned at the end of the 2014 season, the 49ers have been fun, and interesting, and there has been a glimmer of hope, led by the concerningly attra...
Yes, Yes, Give Me All The Good Patriots Gossip
The only thing the NFLosphere is going to be talking about today is this, so you might as well go ahead and read it now. For ESPN, Seth Wickersham delves into the escalating drama at Patriot Place, and hints that the dysfunction between Tom Brady and Bill Belichick has reached the stage where it’s t...
This Figure Skater Performs To "Turn Down For What"
SAN JOSE, Calif.—Figure skater Jimmy Ma just performed his short program at the 2018 National Championships. And about two thirds of the way through his performance, the music changes to a song you wouldn’t expect to hear at a skating competition—DJ Snake’s and Lil’ Jon’s “Turn Down For What.”...
Something's Up With Todd Haley And His Night At Tequila Cowboy
Pittsburgh police say they were summoned to North Shore bar Tequila Cowboy on New Year’s Eve because of a “minor scuffle” involving Steelers offensive coordinator Todd Haley’s wife Christine. That information only came out after the team said Tuesday that Haley was hurt in a fall but would resume h...
Report: Ryan Shazier Has Feeling In His Legs
Steelers linebacker Ryan Shazier, who was carted off the field with a spinal injury during a Dec. 4 game, has regained feeling in his legs, according to a report from WPXI....
Gael Monfils Thwacking This Poor Ball Is Deliciously Satisfying
Most of the time, the tennis ball needs to be struck up and over the net, only to fall back down to earth. Viewed from the side the ball’s path would describe a gentle arc, like a parenthesis tipped onto its back....
Cultural References In This NFL.com Sean McVay Profile, Ranked
The longtime Sports Illustrated writer Michael Silver works for the NFL now, and it appears that his editors there are finally allowing him to live his dream of writing like a prestigious version of Bill Simmons circa 2002. His lengthy profile of Rams head coach Sean McVay is packed with more pop cu...
Why Your NFL Playoff Team Sucks
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here. ...
It Might Be Time To Blow Up The Seahawks
We have likely witnessed the end of an era for the Seahawks. Seattle missed the playoffs for the first time in six seasons, and the harsh realities of age, the cruel logic of the salary cap, and the inevitability of injuries all now threaten the makeup of one of the NFL’s most stable rosters. The pr...
NFL Heiress Arrested After Sloppy Street Altercation
Jacqueline Kent Cooke, daughter of former Skins owner Jack Kent Cooke, was arrested last night after getting into an altercation with a man on an Upper East Side sidewalk....
Bill Belichick Still Does Not Care About Snow, Basic Decency
There’s a 100 percent chance of snow in Foxboro tomorrow, with a foot or more expected. Blizzard conditions are possible, and Gov. Charlie Baker has asked everyone to stay off the roads as many schools and businesses have announced their closures in advance. And Bill Belichick, as always, expects al...
<i>Buffalo News</i> Columnist To Happy Bills Fans: How Dare You Care About Football When You Could Be Worrying About Nuclear War Instead
The Bills, as you’ve no doubt heard by now, have finally broken the NFL’s longest active playoff drought. Wonderful! Such joy for so many long-suffering fans! And a columnist for the local paper has one message for them: please shut up about your “sports,” haven’t you heard that there are literally ...
Blake Bortles Is Indifferent To The Haters, Of Which There Are Many
Here is an endlessly strange sentence: Blake Bortles will lead the Jaguars in a home playoff game this weekend against the Buffalo Bills. The Jags won the AFC South, looking at times like a legit Super Bowl threat, largely thanks to an all-time defense, a powerful rookie running back, and Bortles’s ...
Oh No! <i>Infinity War</i>'s Stupid-Ass Rob Dibble Thumb Looking-Ass Villain's Birth Name Is As Stupid As His Other Name, His Head, His Existence
It’s “Dione.” Which I guess is somehow a dumber name than “Thanos” because, uh, it’s traditionally the name of a goddess instead of a male god? I don’t know. He looks like a thumb with Rob Dibble’s face tattooed on it. Comic fans are not nearly embarrassed enough about this....
Scottish Club Apologizes After Fans Throw Fake Eyeballs At Partially Blind Opposing Player
Scottish second-tier club Falkirk issued a club statement on Tuesday apologizing and condemning the behavior of “a small number of individuals” at that afternoon’s match against Dunfermline. During the match, some Falkirk supporters threw fake eyeballs at Dunfermline’s Dean Shiels, who was blinded i...
Just Kidding, The Bengals Will Never Get Rid Of Marvin Lewis
Though all the evidence pointed Marvin Lewis finally leaving the Bengals—the usually reliable Adam Schefter reported on Dec. 17 that Lewis would be gone after the season—the team announced today that Lewis will receive a two-year extension. What?...