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Andre Johnson Is Sad
This afternoon, the Texans, who suck, lost to the Jaguars, who suck to some really historic degrees. That has made a lot of people in Houston sad, and apparently introspective. People like Andre Johnson. Here he is talking to a delightfully trolly ESPN reporter: ...
The Giants' Season, In One Vine
Goofy turnover turns into a touchdown; an old man is furious. ...
Philip Rivers Wins The Game And Makes A Bunch Of Crazy Faces
Phil Rivers and the Chargers got the ball back with less than a minute and a half, down four and needing a touchdown to win. They got it, on a 26-yard throw to Seyi Ajirotutu, and then Rivers did what he does best: make a bunch of crazy ass faces and look like an insane person who has recently swall...
We Got A Joseph Fauria Touchdown, So We Get A Joseph Fauria Dance
I might be showing a few too many cards here, but that looks a lot like the dorky disco dance from World of Warcraft to me. The touchdown gives Fauria six on the season....
Tavon Austin Scores Cool Touchdown, Moose Calls Him "Tavon Martin"
Cool pitch and half-reverse play here to spring Tavon Austin for a score. Daryl Johnston got his young black males mixed up, though, and called Austin "Tavon Martin"—because, well, you know—before quickly correcting himself. As unfortunate slips go, this isn't the worst, but I'm sure Moose would ra...
Which NFL Pundit Made The Worst Picks In Week 11?
Originally published on PunditTracker...
Which TV Market's Getting Screwed Today? Your Week 12 NFL Viewing Maps
A guide to the best and worst of the NFL slate (and to which fans are stuck with the most of the worst). Maps via 506sports.com....
What High School Yearbook Award Would Peyton Manning Get?
Not sure how fair it is to make fun of Peyton's funhouse mirror forehead the week he's playing Brady and his caveman dome, but I think we can all get behind that Logan Mankins picture as Drunkest Guy At The Picnic. Here's Fallon giving the Pats and Broncos high school yearbook awards. ...
Joe Philbin Thinks Google Glass Comes Equipped With Lasers
We learn two things from the video below (autoplay, sorry), neither having anything to do with the Dolphins' lackluster running game. First, Google Glass is still basically Spy Tech for adults but second, and more importantly, these NFL press conferences are actually kind of sad....
Charts: Who Are The Best Deep Passers In The NFL?
Deep passes are the most exciting play in televised football—the viewing audience can't see the situation downfield until the ball (and the camera) make it down there, so the play always feels, in that tiny moment before we catch up, like a sure touchdown or interception. It's well known that not ev...
Mark Sanchez Has Cornrows
At least we know how Mark Sanchez is commemorating Buttfumble Day....
Where Were You When The Buttfumble Happened?
For Baby Boomers, today marks the 50th anniversary of the assassination of John F. Kennedy. But for those of us who don't belong to the generation that ruined America, Nov. 22 holds an even dearer place in our memories. Today is Buttfumble Day....
Chart: The Impact Of Home Field Advantage On Officiating, By Sport
It's a familiar complaint: Your team goes on the road for a big game, and gets totally jobbed by the refs. But do away teams really get fewer calls?...
The Comedian Who Was Cut Down By The Same Bullet That Killed Kennedy
As you know, today is the 50th anniversary of the assassination of JFK, and as you know, there's very little to say about the assassination, its effects on history, and so on that hasn't already been said. One story you probably don't know, though, is the one about how JFK's death destroyed a famous...
ESPN Writer Takes All-Expenses Paid Trip To Qatar, Loves Qatar
All those problems you thought Qatar's World Cup faced—indentured servitude, bribery allegations, unplayable heat, nonexistent infrastructure—it turns out they can all be made to go away with a stay in a nice hotel and a photo op with Alan Shearer. ...
Chip Kelly During A Game Is As Impatient As You Think
Eagles coach Chip Kelly wore a mic in last Sunday's game against Washington, and he was predictably frantic almost all of the time....