nfl-update Page 1 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Rex's Jets Have Their Hands Full In New Orleans
The four late games are underway, including the marquee match up between the Jets and Saints. Oh, and the Bengals and Browns have finally come to a merciful conclusion....
Brett Favre Ruins AFC East For Everybody
Brett Favre threw his team's playoff chances right into the arms of the Miami Dolphins, giving them the AFC East title while keeping the 11-5 New England Patriots out of the playoffs....
The Cowboys Apologize in Advance for Any Illusion of Competition
The Dallas Cowboys have fallen behind by... let's see now... 312098398219031-3 at the end of the third. Baltimore and Miami continue to battle for the remaining AFC spots....
And Wayne Fontes Thought Perfection Was 8-8
The Detroit Lions showed true devotion to the perfectly awful cause today while the rest of the NFL North showed why they should consider CFL applications. Or maybe KFC applications....
That's One Hell of a Right Jab
This picture comes from earlier today when umpire Garth DiFelice defended himself from a charging Kenneth Darby with a textbook right cross jab to the chin. Or at least that's the way it looks to me....
The Raiders Still Have Some Fight In Them
The Raiders, the Redskins, and some teams that actually still matter at this point in the season....
0-15? Yes, They Can!
• New Orleans vs Detroit: You know what was "a Brees", Detroit Free Press headline writers? The Saints' beatdown of your winless Lions. Drew has thrown for two touchdowns, and well over 300 yards....
Chad Pennington Is Handsome, Accurate
Updates on all of the early games, including a shootout between the Dolphins and Chiefs....
Finally, CBS Gives Us the Two Favres We All Crave
Sure most of the one o'clock games didn't exactly light it up on paper, but most of them remained moderately competitive, and downright watchable throughout. Plus, TWO FAVRES!...
Playoff Spots Are On the Line, Nobody Told Washington
The Redskins are getting crushed, the Falcons are dominating the Bucs, and JP Losman engineered an real touchdown drive and everything....
NFL Update 2: A Game Colder Than Your Obese Sister-In-Law
Dallas (8-4) at Pittsburgh (9-3). Wind chill this morning was at 7 degrees, which means Steelers coach Mike Tomlin will come out wearing Bermuda shorts and a tank top. Wade Phillips will enjoy one of the few benefits of "natural insulation" today. I don't understand how, at 8-4, everyone is counting...
NFL Update 1: Fantasy Football Is Not My Forte
Chicago 20, Jacksonville 3. If you drafted Matt Forte in fantasy this year, JUST SHUT UP ALREADY! Yes, nice job taking a risk on a guy that was in every magazine's top 15 RBs. You're a real riverboat gambler! Forte has 52 yards on the day and the scorn of 11 of every 12 fantasy owners....
Someone Get Cutler A Crossing Guard Vest and Tourist Map, Stat!
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe Rich Gannon said that Jay Cutler has never been to New York before today. Really? A millionaire, star NFL quarterback, and he's never been to New York? Seems odd, but I looked back at the Broncos' schedule, and they haven't visited the Giants or Jets since Cutl...
The Cold November Rain
Chances are the weather sucks where you live right now. Rain, sleet or snow was a factor in five of the 1:00 games, and it's currently coming down hard in New England and New York. It also all but extinguished the playoff hopes of the Bills, Packers, Saints and maybe even the Redskins. Tampa Bay and...
Does Anyone Want to Switch Seats?
Romeo Crennel may not have a choice once this season's over, as his seat gets hotter and hotter each week. Despite the fact that Indy defenders were dropping like flies in this one, Derek Anderson couldn't get anything going for the Browns. His fumble in the 3rd, which the Colts returned for a touch...
A Mighty Wind is Blowing
It's apparently rainy and windy in the Bay, but as commentor "business socks" tells us, that hasn't dampened the spirits of the Buccaneers' cheerleaders. They'll need to step it up, though, as the Bucs are currently down 10-6 to the Saints in the third. Players rely on the cheerleaders for motivatio...
His Favourite Room? The Infirmary
This is apparently a shot of Plaxico Burress's place in Totowa, New Jersey. I'm going to venture a guess to say he won't be using the upstairs part of it for a little while. So it's your move, squatters. But if the small area his current physical limitations have him confined to has a television set...
Seattle Still Has Their Beloved Seahawks
Seattle fans wear their heart on their sleeve and their logo on their head. No wonder Sonics fans were so pissed off. Jim Zorn and Mike Holmgren have been feeling each other out like a Mormon couple on their honeymoon and neither side has looked all that fluid. Clinton Portis has been running wild ...
The Jets Fly High Over the Titans
After 12 weeks the Tennessee Titans have joined the ranks of the defeated thanks to (sigh) Brett Favre and the New York Jets. Apparently there's been a rather large puddle of blood on the field stemming from an injury to Albert Haynesworth, and from what I understand there have been no efforts made...
Blame the Wildcat: Favre Is a Wide Receiver and Fisher Is Skydiving...And McNabb Is Benched
Brett Favre learned everything he knows about playing wide receiver from an instructional book written in an obsolete vernacular. And for some reason Jeff Fisher decided to make his arrival at Friday's practice via parachute. Both teams have added field goals since we last checked in, making the sco...