nfl-update Page 2 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Donovan Is Chilly Yet Stylish
Thanks to Christmas Ape for this screengrab of Donovan McNabb strutting his stuff on the sideline in his favorite oversized mittens. So far they don't seem to be working because the Eagles haven't been able to get it downfield, and the quarterback has thrown an interception. Philly and Baltimore ar...

T.O. Gave the G-Men Extra Motivation Today
• Dallas @ NY Giants: When the G-Men arrived at their lockers today, they reportedly found a box full of "I love me some me" T-shirts courtesy of Terrell Owens. The result, thus far, is a 14-point Giants lead in the fourth, and Owens has been held to only 30 yards on the day (though, he does have a ...

The NFC East Is One Big Hugfest
Kevin Boss, Amani Toomer, and Steve Smith (pictured receiving love from Brandon Jacobs) have been the recipients of Eli Manning's three touchdown passes as we head from afternoon to evening at the Meadowlands. It hasn't been all good for the media's new favorite Manning, he's tossed an interception ...

Vikes Put an End to the Texans' Winning Ways
• Minnesota @ Houston: Purple Jesus and the Vikings (4-4) beat the Texans 31-28, stopping Houston's winning streak cold at three. Peterson rumbled for 139 yards and reached the house once. • Packers at Titans: The game is final (19-16 for the Titans), but we have one final dispatch from Reader Mark...

Bironas Keeps The Titans Undefeated, Almost Blows It
• The Packers and the Titans got physical in the day's biggest matchup. Rob Bironas missed a makeable game winning field goal to send the game into overtime. He got the chance to redeem himself with a game winning shot to end it. The Titans are still without a loss. Damn. • Old man Favre took a beat...

Bringing Rexy Back
• Lions at Bears: With Daunte Culpepper metaphorically breathing down his neck, Dan Orlovsky has responded, and has the Lions thinking about winning their first game of the season in Chicago. And now, enter the one and only Sex Cannon (who just hooked up with Rashied Davis for a TD). ...

Crappy Teams Forget They're Crappy
This could be the week that time forgot. Jobs are on the line and crappy teams all over the league are forgetting that they are, well, crappy. • Keith Bulluck, the Titans leading tackler was taken into the locker room with a rib injury. Bullock wears the radio helmet for Tennessee so coach Jeff Fish...

Why Can't NFL Fans Celebrate Like That?
To my knowledge there haven't been any delightful female-on-female celebrations in the stands at today's NFL games, but as we all know the real action takes place in the Carolina bathrooms. Fortunately the games themselves have produced their own entertainment, unlike your average Big 10 game. New ...

Lazy Sunday
The Packers will keep pace with the Bears in the NFC North. Green Bay has managed to all but shut down Reggie Wayne and Marvin Harrison today, although Dominic Rhodes filled in nicely for the injured Joseph Addai (pronounced "Add-ee-ay", if you're Jeremy Piven). Manning threw a late pick on the goa...

I Think She's Mocking The Way You're Lying On The Couch
You remember that "Favre who?" sign you drew up at the beginning of the year when Green Bay started 2-0, only to shove it back in your closet after they lost 3 in a row? Well, it might be time to take it back out and dust if off, because Aaron Rodgers is looking sharp today! The Colts offense spent ...

Moving into the Late NFL Afternoon
All of the early games are final, and here are your scores: Bills (23) - Chargers (14) Panthers (30) - Saints (7) - There was fear that Reggie Bush's knee injury might be season-ending, but such talk was reportedly premature. Bears (48) - Vikings (41), Steelers (38) - Bengals (10) - Hey, Chad Johns...

Through Daylight and Through Darkness, the Cheerleading Shall Continue
• San Diego at Buffalo: As reader The Fan's Attic points out, the important thing to remember here, kids, is that despite the numerous power outages in the arena during this game, the suggestive dancing never stopped: "Bills cheerleaders continued their routines along the sidelines." USA! USA! USA!...

The NFL - Now With Rouges!
ESPN screw-up aside, there is a wild, wild game going on in the Windy City. The Bears lead the Vikings 27-24 in the third. Chicago's D has already scored two touchdowns, and Chester Taylor stole a TD from Adrian Peterson's fantasy owners just before the half. Blocked punts and field goals are every...

NFL Update
The games are still in their relative infancy, but here's what's going on so far... • New Orleans at Carolina: The Saints' Mike Karney carried the pigskin for a TD, and the Panthers put three points on the scoreboard early on courtesy of John Kasay's foot. Jonathan Stewart has given Carolina a 10-7...

The Sunday Evening NFL Roundup
Those clever Dolphins with their misdirection. I know if I stare long enough Ronnie Brown is going to pop out of nowhere and run my ass into the ground. Brown rushed for 125 yards and a touchdown while Chad Pennington continued to excel at keeping the ball from hitting the ground (75.8% passing). A...

NFL Update: Tony Gonzalez Breaks TE Record
As we head into the second half of the early games, we have a broken record to report. Chiefs' Tony Gonzalez has broken the NFL's career record for yards receiving by a tight end. The record, previously held by Shannon Sharpe, stood at 10,060 yards before today's game. DeAngelo Williams has 102 rush...

NFL Update: Thou Shalt Not Load Thy Box With 8 Men
Tennessee 13, Minnesota 7. The Titans think they're able to stop Purple Jesus. But Peterson already has 44 yards and one TD...NY Jets 21, Arizona 0. It's raining in this game. RAINING FAVRE! They're reviewing this last touchdown to Coles, perhaps to see if there was any illegal touching... Green Bay...

In Gus We Trust
Gus Frerotte, the journeyman QB, may have saved the Vikings' season this afternoon. Behind Frerotte's 37-year old arm, and a relentless defense, the Vikes extinguished Carolina 20-10 and notched their first victory of this young NFL year. Purple Jesus wasn't very god-like, as the injured back carrie...

Late Afternoon NFL Snack
• Steelers at Eagles: A.J. Daulerio kindly requested that I attach the photo you see above to this post, which should tell you everything you need to know about the emotional state Eagles fans are in this afternoon. The Steelers jumped out to a 3-0 lead late in the opening quarter, via a 37-yard fi...

Manning and Griese Lock Up Overtime Wins
You could have guessed that the Buccaneers and Bears would play a close game in Chicago, but I'm pretty sure that only the most diehard of Bengal fans could have pictured Cincinnati pushing the Giants to overtime in New York. In the end only the Bucs and Giants will go home with a victory, each on ...