NFL Page 236 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Big Boy President Threw A Burger Party For His Football Pals
Here is the dream, as I imagine it: A bunch of football players are in the White House. Let’s just say they’re the 1985 Chicago Bears, and let’s further say that they’re doing The Super Bowl Shuffle for reasons that are not immediately apparent. We must say this because the dream is not mine—the dre...
We Need A New "America's Team"
Today, we’re talking about shoelaces, Trump’s hair, insomnia, Philly sports fans, and more....
Rams Beat Cowboys With A Star Turn From A Beefy, Beautiful Jon Gruden Castoff
Perhaps when Jon Gruden insisted that he got “a lot of phone calls from people who are dying to come and play here,” he was telling the truth, and those players didn’t mention how long they planned on staying. Even the briefest stints in Oakland appear to be performance-enhancing. ...
Dak Prescott Gets Sacked By His Own Lineman While Standing Upright
The officials in tonight’s Cowboys-Rams game made their own avant-garde contribution to the NFL’s constantly expanding reality. Is a catch a catch if no one recovers what is later ruled a fumble? Did a play actually end on the one-inch line if it was originally ruled a touchdown? And now: can a quar...
Here's A Nice Patrick Mahomes Throw To Drool Over
Are you tired of sportswriters over-ascribing thinking to every physical motion and intent to every split-second decision? Then you’ve come to the wrong damn blog post! Chiefs QB Patrick Mahomes mostly just missed on his most ambitious throws in the divisional round today, but early in the second ha...
The Colts Scored A Touchdown Before Getting A First Down
The Chiefs are manhandling the Colts on both sides of the ball right now, but the game is still faintly in reach thanks to this blocked punt by Najee Goode and end-zone recovery by Zach Pascal....
It's "Big Dick Nick"
“His throwing motion is a languid shrug, and his passes carve loopy, floaty arcs that seem certain to be intercepted until they settle softly into his receivers’ hands. On the field, he has no obvious rare athletic endowments that explain his success; only in the locker room, it is said by his teamm...
Let's Remember Some Guys: More 1990 Score Football Guys
It has been a while since last we at Let’s Remember Some Guys Remembered Some Guys, but that doesn’t mean that we’d forgotten. We haven’t forgotten any Guys, of course, at least beyond the attrition that comes with being alive and periodically having to do things other than Remembering Guys. But als...
Several Wrong Ways To Say "Philadelphia Eagles"
There was always some risk involved, in retrospect. The balance of power on the Deadcast has always been tenuous in Drew’s absence, with Marchman’s powerfully Marchmanian energy in dynamic tension with my own pure and righteous handsomeness. Sometimes the guests have evened this out, and sometimes, ...
Report: The Oakland A's Are Preparing For Kyler Murray To Enter The NFL Draft
Another wrinkle has been added to the most important will he/won’t he saga involving a college athlete in quite some time. Heisman Trophy winner Kyler Murray is expected to declare for the NFL draft on Sunday, according to a report from the San Francisco Chronicle. The Oakland A’s, who drafted Murra...
It Sucks That Trevor Lawrence Can't Play In The NFL Until 2021
They (the people who know these things) have known about Trevor Lawrence for a long, long time. While the Tennessee-born Lawrence was smashing all of Georgia’s state high school records, he was ranked as the No. 1 overall prospect by every recruiting site and service—every single one of them. It was...
Steve Smith, Who Showboated While Losing, Chides Deshaun Watson For Showboating While Losing
Steve Smith has made his transition from cantankerous NFL player to cantankerous NFL pundit, and over the weekend he treated Texans quarterback Deshaun Watson the way he used to treat opposing defensive backs....
Bears Complete 30-Yard Pass For No Gain As Officials Recover Fumble
The Eagles-Bears game got weird right before halftime when Eagles cornerback Cre’Von Leblanc wrested the ball from Bears receiver Anthony Miller in an impressive display of strength. The play was initially ruled an incompletion, but the inhuman standard of slow motion showed that Miller caught the b...
Refs Cost Chargers And Ravens Touchdowns On Consecutive Plays
A bizarre sequence came to the cosmically correct ending in the Chargers-Ravens game. Refs and replay officials arguably blew at least four separate calls at the 1-yard-line before the Chargers finally punched it in for a 20-3 lead....
The Colts' Rookies Blocked The Texans' Stars Straight Into Hell
Jadeveon Clowney is one of the most talented athletes in all of American sports. Here’s Colts rookie guard Quenton Nelson stopping him cold and then backing him up two full yards before tossing him to the ground: ...
What The Hell Is Jim Irsay Saying Here?
Here’s my best attempt at transcribing the speech that maniacal Colts owner Jim Irsay gave after his team’s wild-card win over the Texans:...
The Seahawks Will Have To Finish Out A Playoff Game Without A Kicker
Seahawks kicker Seabastian Janikowski injured his leg on a missed 57-yard field goal attempt at the end of the first half of tonight’s defensive struggle against the Cowboys, and Seattle has apparently decided that they don’t trust star punter Michael Dickson to attempt even extra points....
Cowboys WR Allen Hurns Leaves Game On Stretcher After Gruesome Leg Injury
In the first quarter of tonight’s playoff game, Cowboys receiver Allen Hurns was tackled by Seahawks safety Bradley McDougald. As Hurns was fighting to stay upright, McDougald fell onto Hurns’s left leg and broke it....
The Houston Texans Are Pure Frauds, No Matter Who's Playing Quarterback
Two interminable streaks were on the line today in Houston: the Texans’ unbroken history of playoff humiliations, and Deshaun Watson not having lost a game by more than one score since high school. The fragrance of ass that exudes from the Texans and Bill O’Brien was more powerful by far, as the Col...