nfl Page 455 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Australian Sportswriter Liveblogs 49ers Game, Discovers Just How Dumb Football Can Be
People in Australia are understandably excited about Jarryd Hayne, a former Australian rugby star who earned himself a roster spot on the San Francisco 49ers. Given that last night was his NFL debut, the Guardian had Australian sportswriter Matt Cleary liveblog the game for the folks in Hayne’s home...
Sick Of All Those Daily Fantasy Games Ads? This Is For You.
It’s no secret the ubiquitous TV ads for gambling, er, “daily fantasy” sites like DraftKings and FanDuel have taken over football’s bathroom breaks this season in ways boner pill manufacturers could only dream of. Everyone’s sick of hearing about this garbage, so we made something that, by compariso...
Adrian Peterson's Learning Curve Is Steep
One game isn’t nearly enough to judge how well Adrian Peterson can pick up where he left off after being out of football for a full calendar year. There were too many variables that went into his quiet night in Santa Clara to make any sweeping pronouncements on whether he’ll recapture his form. But ...
The Many Talents Of Jim Tomsula
Chris Berman: While he was a coaching intern, Tomsula earned money on the side as a battery separator....
How Would You Describe This Eagles Play Call?
But seriously. In our tips email I see “cocksucking monkey,” “designed handjob,” and “a monkey jerking a giraffe.” How would you describe it? ...
Gronk Goes Steady
Perpetual air-humping machine Rob Gronkowski busted out for three touchdowns in his first game of the season, but that’s old news. There’s a much more important development: The Patriots tight end is legitimately dating someone....
Marcus Mariota Looked Fantastic
The second-worst team in football last season was blessed to open their campaign against the worst team in football. Both of them had shiny new quarterbacks, and are a year removed from flimsy, bottom-three defenses. That’s where the similarities stopped. Titans quarterback Marcus Mariota stomped on...
The Giants' Collapse Was Even Dumber Than It Looked (And It Already Looked Pretty Dumb)
It was one thing when it appeared that the Giants’ merely brainfarted 40 extra seconds to the Cowboys for a game-winning drive that needed 33 of them. Now as players discuss the calls in the huddle and from the sideline, it’s so, so much worse: the Giants a) did not realize how many timeouts the Cow...
Kam Chancellor's Holdout Couldn't Be Going Any Better
Kam Chancellor is still negotiating with the Seahawks for a new contract, and as his holdout bled into Week 1 of the regular season, undrafted sophomore Dion Bailey took his place at strong safety Sunday against the Rams. It was clear that Chancellor’s starting job will be waiting for him when he co...
Pacman Jones Won't Be Suspended For Slamming Amari Cooper's Head Into His Own Helmet
Kind of surprisingly, multiple reports state that Bengals corner Adam “Pacman” Jones will be fined but not suspended for ripping off Raiders WR Amari Cooper’s helmet and bashing the back of his head against it....
Washington Would Really Like You To Know About All Of Its Wonderful Navajo Art
This comes to us from a fan who watched Sunday’s Miami-Washington game from a suite inside Washington’s stadium. He tells us that the suites are adorned with various pieces of art, and that the team is very eager to let people know exactly who made the art....
Cops: Man Kills Himself At Buffalo Bills Tailgate
On Saturday night, an RV lot near the Buffalo Bills’ stadium was packed full of tailgating fans preparing for the team’s first game of the season. Around 10:20 p.m., one of those fans shot and killed himself, according to police....
Dez Bryant Got Hurt, Stayed Hyped
One of the worst things about Week 1 is the inevitable rash of injuries that knocks a half-dozen or so stars out for a good portion of the season. Dez Bryant’s injury wasn’t the most serious of the day, but he’ll need surgery on his broken foot and will miss the next four to six weeks. Don’t worry a...
The Giants' Loss Was Inexplicable
This wasn’t one of those bad, game-killing decisions that requires hindsight to identify as a mistake. It’s no less baffling the morning after as it was the moment Eli Manning floated the ball out of the end zone to stop the clock and gave the Cowboys a full minute-and-a-half to complete their comeb...
Miss America Takes Crown Thanks To Declaring That Tom Brady "Definitely Cheated"
Miss Georgia Betty Cantrell is your new Miss America, and she won the title shortly after responding to a Tom Brady ball-deflation question with: “If there was question there, then yes, I think he cheated.”...
The NFL's New Extra Point Rule Is Great
For all the worried exegesis of the NFL’s corn-fed rulebook this offseason, not much of it was aimed at football’s best rule change in years: the new extra point. ...
Bucs Fans Boo Jameis
Seems Buccaneers fans are a bit impatient, as it took all of two quarters for them to boo their new starting quarterback. ...
Pacman Jones Rips Amari Cooper's Helmet Off, Slams His Head Into It
Welcome to the NFL rook! Jones is going to have to find something to do next weekend. Here are some ideas, man....
Seahawks Choose To Run This Time With Game On The Line, Still Lose
The Seahawks lost a wild one in overtime in St. Louis today. Nick Foles took the field for the first time as a Ram and he was very solid with 297 yards and touchdowns via air and ground, but the truly remarkable part of the game was the *fart noise* that was the Seahawks’ overtime effort. ...
The Miami Dolphins Are The First Team To Earn A Yakety Sax Treatment
Congratulations, Dolphins. This Boots’s for you....