nfl Page 567 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Insane Handbook: Bills Cheerleaders Are Told How To Wash Their Vaginas
There are a few things you need to know if you want to be a successful Buffalo Bills cheerleader. “When menstruating, use a product that [sic] right for your menstrual flow,” reads the “General hygiene & lady body maintenance” section of the handbook given to cheerleaders, known as the Jills. “A tam...

The NFL Schedule, Ranked By Week
Whoa, hey, the NFL schedule came out last night. Sure, thanks to perfect divisional symmetry, you already knew all 16 of your team's opponents this upcoming fall, but you didn't know the ORDER of those opponents, and the NFL knows that putting things in order is fun! Also, you get to measure your t...

Your Team Should Win 11, Maybe 12 Games This Season
With the release of the NFL schedule, fans everywhere finally have the chance to see their team's 16-game slate, and work out probable final records. And yeah, look at those games; your team's going to the playoffs for sure....

Seahawks Announce Russell Wilson Is Getting A Divorce
QB Russell Wilson has filed for divorce from his wife Ashton, according to a statement released today by the Seahawks:...

Buffalo Bills Publish Report That Head Coach Has "BLANK TYPE OF CANCER"
The Buffalo Bills published an article which reported head coach Doug Marrone had cancer. Though Marrone may have planned to announce his cancer, the story looks to be prematurely published, since "BLANK TYPE OF CANCER" is still in the dek....

Dan Snyder Exploiting Indians Isn't The Real Issue, Says Dan Snyder
Washington Redskins owner Dan Snyder was in the news today. If you're short on time, yes, he continues to not give a fuck about Native Americans, or you, or your opinion of him exploiting and slurring Native Americans for personal gain....

Suit: Bills Cheerleaders Were Taught How To Wash "Intimate Areas"
Now come five Buffalo Jills, joining the growing list of NFL cheerleaders suing their team for allegedly flouting state and federal employment laws. In many ways, their story shows how standardized these practices have become. But in terms of micromanagement, neither of the other cheerleading teams ...

Bills Pay $3 Million To Settle Stupid Text-Message Lawsuit
A couple years back, Bills fans signed up to receive text messages featuring news and offers from the team. The fine print said they'd receive no more than five a week. This guy Jerry Wojcik got six! And then, a few weeks later, seven! So he sued. And now the Bills have agreed to cough up more than ...

Jaguars Linebacker Russell Allen Suffered An In-Game Stroke
If you have a minute at lunch today, swing by MMQB and read Robert Klemko's piece on Russell Allen, the Jacksonville Jaguars linebacker who suffered a stroke in last year's Week 15 game against the Buffalo Bills. It's another sad story in a long line of sad stories about the hell America's favorite ...

Evan Mathis Trolled A Reporter Hard
It was questionable whether the Eagles' guard Evan Mathis would show up for today's voluntary OTAs, given that he's a potential trade or holdout candidate. Last night, the Philadelphia Daily News's longtime columnist Paul Domowitch pretty conclusively declared that Mathis would be absent:...
![What The Hell Is Going On With Donovan McNabb's Mug Shot? [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/if1v7ohi4ipjgxqeqnyk.jpg)
What The Hell Is Going On With Donovan McNabb's Mug Shot? [Update]
The Maricopa County (Ariz.) sheriff's office today released this mug shot of former NFL player Donovan McNabb...and absolutely zero details. Which is a pretty fucking weird thing to do, even in the land of Joe Arapaio....

How Nolan Nawrocki Made Himself Into The NFL's Most Infamous Scout
Nolan Nawrocki lives in the nicest house in a tidy neighborhood in Elmhurst, Ill., a western suburb of Chicago. When I visit him a couple of weeks before Easter, the windows are already awash in signage....

NFL Draft Scouting Has Eaten Itself
We're less than a month from the draft, which means we're at the point where front-office personnel have mostly made up their minds and anything said about prospects is likely to make you demonstrably dumber. To wit:...

49ers Linebacker Aldon Smith Detained At LAX After Bomb Mention
San Francisco 49ers linebacker Aldon Smith was arrested at Los Angeles International Airport today, according to multiple reports....

ESPN Uses "Street Clothes" Photo Of Kaepernick, Then Decides Otherwise
For some reason, ESPN used a photo of Colin Kaepernick in a backwards hat and regular clothes early Saturday morning while reporting on his "suspicious incident." Usually, a standard photo of him in a uniform would accompany the report. Why the switch?...

Hernandez Associates Indicted On Murder Charges, And That's A Huge Deal
Two of Aaron Hernandez's associates have been indicted on murder charges, a move that has major implications for Hernandez's case. Now, to convict him of murder, prosecutors will no longer have to prove that Hernandez pulled the trigger. ...

Chargers Logo Used To Spice Up Synthetic Chemistry Research
In an outstanding sports-nerd move, chemists at the Scripps Research Institute—located in the La Jolla neighborhood of San Diego—have managed to slip the Chargers logo into the research abstract of an upcoming Journal of the American Chemical Society paper. ...

Bitchy Pats Fans Harass Brandon Spikes After He Talks About Winning
Linebacker Brandon Spikes left the Patriots after four seasons to sign with the Buffalo Bills. New England didn't seem to want him back, and the parting seemed amicable. But that won't stop some Patriots fans from overreacting when Spikes talked about beating the Patriots today in the most boring wa...

The Braves Set The American Flag On Fire At Their Home Opener
The Braves really fucked up, you guys. During yesterday's home opener against the Mets, they set off a fireworks display way, way too close to the American flag. You are not supposed to put flames that close to the American flag, Braves!...

NFLPA Comes Out In Support Of College Players' Union
In recent days, high-ranking NCAA and university executives have had op-eds placed in the New York Times and the Wall Street Journal arguing against the right of college players to unionize. One of those papers then turned down the NFLPA's attempt to get a response published. ...