no Page 5241 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
That Last Name Never Gets Easier To Spell
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Quiet, Stoic Leader To Have Boring Retirement
Quebec Nordique legend Joe Sakic is calling it a career after 20 seasons in the NHL and not a single embarrassing scandal that we could all have a good laugh over now. What a jerk. [Denver Post]...
CBS News By Brooks
This photograph of Sahel Kazemi comes from CBS News' Crimesider blog, which promises "a rare glimpse into the slain football hero's hidden world" but in reality offers nothing but a glimpse into a dead woman's cleavage....
Somehow, Michael Jackson Was Partly Responsible For Magic Johnson's Greatness
I applaud Magic Johnson's ability to personalize it: "the way he controlled the band...the stage." But I'm sure he'd use the same approach if he were eulogizing a painter or a vacuum cleaner repairman. [Gawker]...
Someone Else Actually Wants To Buy The Cubs?
Hold the phone, North Siders. Wrigley Field and its tenants have supposedly been sold for $900 million, but a new suitor has stepped in to Cubsblock the Ricketts. Will the team slip through their fingers like a groundball to short?...
Just In Case You Wanted To Know What A Dwarf Wrestler Funeral Looks Like
Those two little masked heroes that were killed by bandit hookers last week had a well-attended funeral, which could have easily been mistaken for a Rob Zombie film. [The Sun via BarStoolSports]...
Brett Tomko Uses Painting To Ease Pain Of Being Brett Tomko
"For me, the best way to move on from [a bad outing] is to get the paints out. Kind of take my mind off the pitching for a few hours and just kind of regroup." [Star-Ledger]...
From The Desk Of Gary Belsky: Hygiene Edition
Gary Belsky is the EIC of ESPN The Magazine, which you probably know as the strange, unwieldy object wedged into your mailbox every other week. Sometimes, funny things happen at Gary's magazine, and employees tell us about them....
Steve McNair's Death Doesn't Make <i>SI</i> Cover
The May 3, 2004 Pat Tillman cover was the last time Sports Illustrated put a professional athlete's death on the next week's cover. This week's has a cover line about Wimbledon, but no hint of S.L. Price's elegant McNair tribute....
A Starburst Is Born
To one Tampa Bay Rays fan, these stars are not similar. To a Florida prosecutor, the blue star is a shameless rip of the yellow star. Which might put the fan in the clink for a year....
Bringing SexyBack To Golf
Justin Timberlake — former frontman for *NSYNC, international pop superstar, 6-handicap on the links — is shopping his first book. It's about golf, and it's reportedly a memoir about the 28-year-old's memorable rounds. Well, no one's done that before. [NYO]...
Michael Phelps Makes America Safe For Weed
Congratulations, dope heads! Your groovy hero has bonged his way into America's heart and now you're free to toke up wherever and whenever you see fit. Enjoy your reefer, hippies, and be sure to thank Michael Phelps when you do....
Yankees Will Deign To Respect Our Civil Liberties
Bradford Campeau-Laurion — the guy who was drummed out of Yankee Stadium for trying to tinkle during the Yankees' seventh-inning tribute to compelled patriotism, the playing of "God Bless America" — has settled his lawsuit against the team and city....
More Whitlock: McNair's Not A Hero, He's Not The Morality Police, Likes To Get His "Becky On" As Well
"Personally, I prefer June-December romances, but a blossoming May flower certainly could be fertilized into a special, 28-year-old bouquet by a patient and attentive gardener." Also: "Becky."[Fox Sports]...
Lance Armstrong Can't Not Be The Top Dog
Lance Armstrong said he just wanted to get some exercise and maybe promote his wristbands, because after four years off, expecting him to win the Tour de France would just be silly. What's that? He's in first place now? Lovely....
F—k Your Stupid Life Event: A Guide To Gift Giving
I hate buying gifts. I hate shopping for them, even online, which requires only that I click a mouse a few times, maybe fill out your address. NO TIME FOR THAT SHIT....
The Death Of Steve McNair And The War Against Cliché
The eulogies to Steve McNair are pouring in from all points on the compass, and one word seems to be showing up again and again. You know which one: "warrior."...
The Real Reason You Should Hate The Media (And That Includes Us)
A new media site launched yesterday that serves as a rather handy reminder of just why everyone hates the media....
The Fate Of U.S.-Russia Relations Rests On Alexander Ovechkin's Stick
"As a resident of Washington, D.C., I continue to benefit from the contributions of Russians — specifically, from Alexander Ovechkin," said Barack Obama, who was criticized for not being a true puckhead. Don't get greedy, Capitals fans. [D.C. Sports Bog]...
Cristiano Ronaldo Stars In World's Largest Press Conference
Almost 80,000 people showed up at Real Madrid's stadium last night just to watch Cristiano Ronaldo try on a shirt. I'm starting to suspect that you don't love your favorite team enough....