no Page 5323 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Do Not Cross The Hillsdale College Baseball Team
In a tradition as old as baseball itself, an editor who criticized the Hillsdale College (Mich.) baseball team's putrid record found his front porch decorated with dead animal carcasses, including a shotgunned goat....

Why Do The Mets Hate Children?
There was a time when the New York Mets welcomed young children into their stadium with open arms, but now that they're in a new clean stadium and not some old junkyard....screw those kids....

Ted Kennedy Still Looked Better Than Lincecum
"Thank God this isn't Deadspin, or the comments would be loaded with 1.3 retarded Massholes typing "GO SOX!!1!!!@!!!" [Wonkette]...

It's Good To Be Bill Macdonald
Fox Sports West's Bill Macdonald has been a popular LA-based broadcaster for more than 20 years. Unfortunately, Halos Heaven ran some photos of him getting cozy with a young woman outside of Angels Stadium....

Lions Take Stafford At No. 1. Rams, You Are Now On The Clock
At least that's what Pro Football Talk is reporting, with the caveat that interest in the Georgia QB may just be a clever smokescreen (ha ha, but anyway ...). [Pro Football Talk]...

Tank Johnson Is Obviously Confident That He's A Changed Man
The former Bear/Cowboy/convict has just signed a one year deal with...the Cincinnati Bengals. [ESPN]...

NFL Prospects: If You Don't Want To Damage Your Draft Position, Keep Your Dirty Details Off The Internet
Here's a fascinating story from Yahoo!'s Charles Robinson about how some NFL teams create phony social networking accounts to do some clandestine character background checks of potential draft picks. This is what we hath wrought....

OK You Pissants, Make Way For Randy Johnson
There's been little wailing and no gnashing of teeth in the Bay Area over Tim Lincecum's underwhelming '09 debut on Tuesday. That's because A. The Giants won, and B. Their headliner is actually starting tonight....

Mike Florio Demands More Spanking In The NFL
It's Week 4 of the Deadcast, and we continue our extremely slow progress into something barely resembling a polished, professional broadcast. Helping the cause this week is our guest....

Rest Easy America, The Lance Armstong Bike Thieves Are Behind Bars
After an exhaustive manhunt, Sacramento police have captured the people they think stole Lance Armstrong's bike during practice runs for the Tour of California on Feb. 15. And one is named Dung Le. [ABCNews10]...

Skip Off The Pond, On To The Green, Nothing But Cup....
I wish there were a way to calculate the odds of anyone ever making this shot again. [Dogs Chasing Cars]...

I'm Beginning To Suspect That Canadians Drink Too Much Beer
If you were wondering why the Blue Jays drew only 16,790 against the Tigers on Tuesday, this may have something to do with it: The Rogers Centre banned alcohol for that game....

Tommy "The Hitman" Hearns Reduced To Fighting Chickens
Good job, Michigan State. Your failure to rescue the city of Detroit from financial ruin has forced a once great boxing champion to play tic-tac-toe against poultry for money. I hope you're happy....

Lee Corso. Barry Melrose. Dick Vitale
Who are three people I would not want to see have a Lemon Party? Or, according to Esquire.com, three "men you should emulate." [Esquire.com]...

John Calipari Continues His Dismantling Of Memphis
It was bad enough when John Calipari's daughter decided to follow her dad to the University of Kentucky, but it looks like Memphis isn't going to get to keep any of his players either....

Connecticut Isn't Terrible
Another 20-point win, another national title for UConn. This is the third undefeated season for the school—the fifth all-time—and their sixth national championship. I guess they have an okay program. [ESPN; The Big Lead]...

Hey, Those Seats In The New Yankee Stadium Look Comfortable
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

That's One Way To Describe UNC's Dominance
"The Carolina lead mushroomed to 10 after 4:04. To 15 after 7:03. To 20 after 9:38. It was a seal clubbing..." [ESPN]...

Dogs And Cats Have Officially Slept Together...Reilly On The B.S. Report
And they said this day would never come. Whatever feud may or may not have (allegedly) existed between Rick Reilly and the Sports Fella, it appears that rivalry has now been extinguished....

I See No Negative Safety Implications Here
If there's one thing I'm sure of, it's that the new Indoor Football League is completely safe for both players and fans. But then I'm still holding on to Enron stock....