no Page 5545 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Giants Roll, Tennis Trash Talk And A Message From Doctor Lou
Each weekday morning Awful Announcing, video slash and grab extraordinaire of the sports blogosphere, gives us a visual rundown of everything you missed from the night before. If there's something sports-related you'd like to see with your coffee, shoot him an e-mail and let him know....

The End Of Productivity: Your NFL Opener Is Finally Here
I don't know about you, but after a summer of confusing Chinese Olympic ceremonies and Barry Zito highlights, I'm ready for tonight's game big time. Redskins! Giants! Meadowlands! The NFL is here! My nipples explode with delight. If they're smart, the Giants should have worked this week on figuring ...

Mr. Met Will Shield Your Children From Online Predators
Watch out evildoers, Mr. Met is now savvy to the ways of the Interwebs. He is ready to kick some serious online predator ass. The Mets are having their Internet Safety Day on Saturday, and there are plenty of fun Internet safety activities planned. I'm pretty sure. Actually I have no idea, so let's ...

Arian Foster's Philosophy Store Coming to a Strip Mall Near You?
I haven't made myself watch the UT-UCLA game yet. It's sitting on my DVR. I put on the pregame last night and heard Rece Davis, Lou Holtz, and Mark May talking about how many times Arian Foster would carry the ball. Holtz and May both predicted he'd get over 150 yards. They were wrong. Arian only g...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while mourning the loss of your mechanical ape ... • NFL: Redskins at Giants (7 p.m., ET). The dance, she begins. [NBC] • College football: South Carolina at Vanderbilt (8:30 p.m., ET). Commodores; the most fearsome of all seagoing officers. [ESPN] • Tennis: U.S. Open, men's quarterfin...

Chris Cooley and the Redskins' Fantasy Football Draft
There's an exception for fantasy football posts when actual NFL players are involved, right? Crickets. Anyway, Fred Smoot steals the draft show. But is that really any surprise? Also of note, Colt Brennan going with LenDale White in what appears to be the first round of the draft. Decision making...

NFL Season Preview: New Orleans Saints
We're less than 12 hours away from the start of the NFL season, so it's time to finish the impassioned season previews from various writers, bloggers, diehard fans, cooks, TV personalities, and numerous other walks of life whom consider football the only sport worth watching. Clearly, these previews...

High Jumping and Vodka Don't Mix Well
Ivan Ukhov is a Russian high jumper. He's pictured above in the midst of a successful high jump. According to many reports, he's also a fan of Red Bull and vodka. No problem there. He'd be hugely popular at Rutgers. But when you combine Red Bull and vodka with a track competition? Well, it's not so...

Afternoon Blogdome: Houston, We Have A Noggin
• This should make Yao Ming less terrified:"Far from offering further evidence that Artest is a madman, here we find Ron Ron just taking up a retro trend whose time has returned. Peep the cover of 3rd Bass's The Cactus Album for a historical point of reference; yes, dudes are white, but they had the...

Even Bathroom Doors Hate the Yankees This Year
When things aren't going well for your team there is no end to the obstacles confronting them. Every day you get online and a new disaster has occurred. Even when you can't see them coming. Such as this story. Jason Giambi split his eyelid walking into the bathroom door of his hotel. Giambi told th...

The University Of Virginia Will Not Tolerate Your Disrespectful Signage
You have hurt Al Groh's feelings for the last time, Virginia fans. The Cavaliers' troubled and sensitive head coach — who really only wants to be loved — has taken a lot of abuse from Virginia fans over the past two seasons. It's in part because of his $1.7 million contract, and in part due to thing...

The Dickpire Strikes Back: The Return Of Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs, well, every Thursday afternoon during the NFL season. Drew's new book, "Men With Balls," released October 27th and featuring 100% new material, is available for pre-order here. You can email Drew here. Read him during the week at KSK. Ev...

The 600 Club
Fun pregame activity for Florida Marlins players: Guess the attendance. Wednesday's opponent at Dolphins Stadium: Atlanta Braves. So Marlins reliever Joe Nelson does a head count and guesses, 418 fans. He was way off. The true count: 600. Each fan had his own personal usher. But was this a record fo...

NFL Season Preview: Washington Redskins
We're less than 12 hours away from the start of the NFL season, so it's time to finish the impassioned season previews from various writers, bloggers, diehard fans, cooks, TV personalities, and numerous other walks of life whom consider football the only sport worth watching. Clearly, these preview...

Read Former Utah Jazz Center Mark Eaton's Screenplay: Riding the Bench
Everyone believes they have a screenplay in them. Your mom, your unemployed uncle, and anyone else who has ever watched a movie. Including 7'4 former Utah Jazz Center Mark Eaton. But most of these screenplays never see the light of day, which is fortunate. Not so with the first eight pages of Eaton...

Daunte Culpepper's Rather Depressing Email Retirement
The starnge, sometimes brilliant career of quarterback Daunte Culpepper — who played Butch to Randy Moss' Sundance in six seasons with the Vikings — has announced his retirement. It wasn't at a press conference, but in an email to NFL.com reporter Adam Schefter. Replaced by Trent Green in Miami, a b...

Somewhere, Matt Leinart Is Smiling
Well, this is unfortunate. But it appears pseudonymous website proprietor "Nik Richie" of TheDirty.com was nabbed for a DUI last January and The Smoking Gun has the wince-worthy police report from the night of his arrest. Nik Richie is actually 29-year-old Hooman Karamian and, well, Jesus, let's go ...

Your Emeritus' Smattering Of NFL Predictions
When I was running this here site, I tried to do as few predictions as possible, because I have no idea what I'm talking about. That is to say: I know as much as everybody else. Sure, I could say something like, "I was talking to John Fox in practice the other day, and he feels really strongly abou...

You Can Take Our Sarah Palin Videos, But You'll Never Take Our FREEDOM
You're slipping, Republican Party. It took you four entire days to find and eradicate the great Sarah Palin sportscaster video from the YouTubes; the one we found and posted on Saturday to the delight of a weary world starved for young newswomen with gigantic, 1980s hair. Those were a glorious four ...

NFL Season Preview: New York Giants
We're less than 12 hours away from the start of the NFL season, so it's time to finish the impassioned season previews from various writers, bloggers, diehard fans, cooks, TV personalities, and numerous other walks of life whom consider football the only sport worth watching. Clearly, these previews...