no Page 5700 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Break Out The Head Paint: Sixers Win <i>Again</i>!
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who would be getting more sleep this weekend if the destruction of the Suns wasn't keeping him up at night. When he's not hating the absolute living hell out of the Spurs, he can be found stabbing his Tony Parker voodoo doll at Basketbawful. Enjoy! Wait...w...
March Of The Penguins
Perhaps next time Jaromir Jagr should Czech his trash talking at the door (PUNTASTIC BURN!!!!) as the not quite Mario Lemieux-level Sidney Crosby and Evgeni Malkin helped to erase a 3-0 Rangers lead to give the Pens a 1-0 series advantage. Jagr had a chance to tie in the waning moments, but clanged ...
Teddy Wins His First Presidents Race!
Only to get disqualified by Screech, the world's most useless mascot, for cutting a corner of the warning track. He was just following Cartman's advice! That's okay, because I found Frank Robinson sitting with me in the bleeds down the right field line. As for the game, the Nats jumped to a lead wi...
About Last Night...
What you missed while mixing your sports metaphors......
Now You See T.O., Now You Don't
• Terrell Owens, vanishing from porn films. • Santonio Holmes is packing some heat. • Butterfingers for a Red Sox fan. • Jeff Passan and Terry Pettis. • Topless ladies (kinda) at Rockies games. • It's Jeff Reed night. • Yankees-Red Sox fight! • As spirited a defense of the NFL Draft as we could imag...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after surviving the Great Jell-o Snack Pack Disaster of 2008 ... • Boxing: Middleweights, Andrey Tsurkan vs. Jesse Feliciano, at New York (9:30 p.m., ET). The return of El Rayo! [ESPN2] • NBA playoffs: Eastern Conference first round, Game 3, Detroit Pistons at Philadelphia 76ers (7 p.m...
All Right, All Right, We'll Watch The Draft
OK, so Drew absolutely convinced us: We're actually gonna watch a little bit of the draft this weekend. And not just because we're crossing our fingers that our Buzzsaw will end up with the Illini's Rashard Mendenhall. Though we are....
Previewing The Stars-Sharks
Deadspin's NHL Conference Semifinal Series Previews are being brought to you by Melt Your Face Off, where hockey is the official religion but all the editors are atheists. MYFO's Weed Against Speed breaks down the Dallas/San Jose series....
NBA Playoffs: A Friday Night Viewer's Guide
It's Friday. Take a break from thinking for yourself and let me tell you what to pay attention to during tonight's games....
So, Will Anybody Draft Troubled Tommy Blake?
One of the best stories featured on ESPN's Schaaptastic E:60 show was Michael Smith's profile of troubled Texas Christian University defensive lineman Tommy Blake. Blake, who at one point in his college career was on the fast-track to the NFL, derailed early his senior year. He was a no-show for man...
Now, Majerle's Miffed At TheDirty.com
After yesterday's legal parry with the lawyer representing Terrell Owens in his futile fight to de-Dirty.com himself from internet memory, another sports figure has also threatened legal action against the website: Thunder Dan Majerle....
Tom Brady Is Out Of The Closet And Bent On Murder
Anyone watch Law & Order: Special Victims Unit? Apparently Tuesday's episode involved a thinly disguised version of Tom Brady, who was a gay quarterback implicated in a murder. Sample dialogue: "Lincoln Haver is gay? I thought he was dating Natasha Gorski, that hot supermodel." "You can't blame Linc...
Anyone Can Throw A Knuckleball!
We've always thought if there were a mainstream sports breakthrough for a woman, a sport in which a woman could compete on the same field as men, it would be as a knuckleball pitcher in Major League Baseball. It doesn't require strength, and you need to be smart. And not just women can do it: Old me...
Previewing The Rangers-Penguins
Deadspin's NHL Conference Semifinal Previews come courtesy of Melt Your Face-Off. Over at MYFO, Sunday service starts tonight, and holding back when the collection plate comes around earns you a two-minute seat in the penalty pew. In the meantime, Hextall454 brings you the righteous preview of the N...
Our Breasts Can Always Tell When It's Going To Rain
If only you knew how mean she really is... You'd know that we're not allowed to wear hoop earrings, right? Yeah! Two years ago she told us hoops earrings were her thing and we weren't allowed to wear them anymore. And then for Hannakuh our parents got this pair of really expensive white gold hoops a...
Finally, A Pro Baseball Team With Glow-In-The-Dark Caps
How many times have you asked yourself, 'Why can't I see my favorite baseball cap logo when the lights are out?' (If you're like me, plenty). Well, if your favorite team is the Casper Ghosts of the Pioneer Rookie League, then you don't have that problem. This season the Ghosts (formerly the Casper R...
Die, Bruins, Die!
• God is trying to kill all of UCLA's quarterbacks. [Gutty Little Bruins] • More praise for NHL playoff beards. [The Love Of Sports] • Kelvin Sampson, likely to be back in coaching. [Rumors And Rants] • Sports' worst father-son combos. [The Play In CA] • It can't be fun to be a Pirate sometimes. [On...
A Brief Conversation With Mike Mamula
This morning I had a brief chat with everybody's favorite (OK, my favorite) ex-Philadelphia Eagles and draft day legend Mike Mamula. Surprisingly, even though his name is brought up during practically every NFL draft analysis, he hasn't received any phone calls this week....
Media Approval Ratings: Pam Oliver
We forget, sometimes, just how unstable the life of a broadcast journalist can really be. Witness the following paragraph from Pam Oliver's Wikipedia page....
Byron Scott's Son Is Doing His Best To Support His Pops
We're still a little surprised that the New Orleans haven't caught on nationally quite yet. The Saints were an amazing, inspiring story that united the country (other than Eagles fans, of course), but the Hornets still just seem to glide past, with people still not quite aware of what Chris Paul is...