no Page 5786 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Hey, Everyone! They're About To Bury Barbaro! Finally!
We're just a couple weeks away from the year anniversary of the day Barbaro galloped off this mortal coil, and no one has decided yet what to do with his ashes. It's a big concern. Really....

Today's NFL Season Recap: The Dallas Cowboys
Heh Heh [A Large Regular]...

Shred All You Want, They'll Make More
New Michigan coach Rich Rodriguez isn't the only one out there shredding papers with reckless abandon; some overzealous Packers fans are getting into the act....

If You Don't Cook Brats, The Terrorists Win
As mentioned, we're heading to Glendale for the Super Bowl this year — yes, yes, book promotion — and we were looking forward to walking around some of the tailgates beforehand on Super Sunday. But we'd forgotten: They don't allow tailgates at the Super Bowl. A travesty, and now some people are tryi...

If Joe Buck Does This With Favre Sunday, Watch Out
Many viewers have expressed their disgust with the comments of analyst Roger Rasheed, but we think the blame rests more with the guy in the production truck who provided the slow motion replay of Serena Williams' buttocks. At a certain point, didn't Rasheed have to say something?...

The Championship Games And Phone Sex Anticipation
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon....

Flooding In Arkansas
• Ryan Mallet has some dorm room trouble. [Hawg Blawg] • Once again, there will be no Falcons in the Hall of Fame. [Loserville USA] • Scott Rolen, happy to be in Toronto. [Bugs And Cranks] • Mark DeRosa would like his starting spot, please. [Cobra Brigade] • A preview of the African Cup of Nations s...

Eli Manning Sent To Room With No TV
So Fox affiliate WLUK TV-Green Bay has this convoluted plan to get under Eli Manning's skin this weekend, as you may have heard. Someone told station GM Jay Zollar that Manning is fond of Seinfeld, so Zollar is pulling the show from the station's schedule on Saturday. Remember when no one cared what...

Packers Fans Tend To Be Wise And Capable Parents
You know about this by now, but it must be addressed. Well, it seems that some kids wear their Green Bay Packers clothing by choice. Others, not so much. When 36-year-old Matthew Kowald's 7-year-old son refused to wear a Packers jersey during Green Bay's playoff game with Seattle on Saturday, Kowald...

Greg Paulus Flops Like A Champion
If you needed any more proof that Duke will always, always be Duke, here's the egregious flops from Duke's Greg Paulus during last night's Duke-Florida State game....

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its wittiest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

EVERYTHING HE PUNDITS IS IMPORTANT
For the second time in just more than a week, Stephen A. Smith appeared on Chris Matthews' "Hardball" last night. It makes perfect sense, so much so that we wonder if Smith is employed by the wrong channel....

We Are Now Outsourcing Our Cheerleaders
The new issue of The Atlantic Monthly looks at just how much of our country China actually owns. (Answer: At this point, almost all of it.) And this is how you know it has gone too far: They're now controlling what we do with our cheerleaders....

Sidney Crosby Has Taste In The Ladies
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of The FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....

Revenge Of The Duke Hobbits
Jonah Keri writes the college basketball closer (more or less) daily. E-mail your questions, comments or Clarence Ceasar-related memories to [email protected]....

Fire Up That Celtics Hype Machine Again
The NBA Closer is written by our Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or partying with Corey Worthington, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast....

About Last Night
What you missed while unleashing hell with a rubber band gun ... • NBA: Celtics win, Earth returns to normal orbit. • College basketball: Knight's 900th win is rather meaningful ... Texas Tech 68, No. 9 Texas A&M 53. • NFL: OK, his name is very similar to Tony Soprano. We get it. Dolphins hire Spara...

Randy Moss Is Hands Off With The Ladies
So, now the Randy Moss restraining order story has gone "mainstream" — which is different than it going "legit" — what's the deal with it? What's the story? And does it have legs? And by "have legs," we mean, "will it sufficiently disgust Joe Buck?" Here are the papers....