north Page 32 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Sadistic Media Targeted "Carolina Way," Whinges Ex-UNC Chancellor
Pro tip for anyone trying to make sense of a scandal. If the person at the center of it starts claiming that "the media" are persecuting them, it's usually (though not always) a solid bet that they are patently full of shit. It's the equivalent of shooting the messenger and then claiming self-defens...

How North Dakota Lost Its Mind Over A "Choke Job"
On Feb. 16, the Northern Arizona basketball team rallied to beat North Dakota in overtime, 74-72. In a postgame interview with North Dakota head coach Brian Jones, the team's radio guy, Paul Ralston, a university employee, called the loss a "choke job." What ensued was the most pitiful college sport...

Raw Video Of A Marathon In North Korea Is Eerily Disquieting, Perfectly North Korean
Even though North Korea is going to blow the world up any day now, the country still hosted an international marathon as part of a national holiday celebrating the birth of its founder, Kim Il-sung....

Northern Kentucky University Athletic Director Dismissed For Affairs With Four Staffers, One Student
More athletic directors in the news! Northern Kentucky University dismissed Scott Eaton, once an athletic administrator at Brown and a member of the NKU department since 1998, for undisclosed reasons in early March. As we learned late yesterday, Eaton was guilty of "inappropriate, intimate relations...

Northwestern Has Fired Bill Carmody After 13 Years Of Decent-By-Northwestern-Standards Basketball
In 13 seasons as the head coach at Northwestern University, an alleged Big Ten basketball program, Bill Carmody’s signature moment might’ve been getting hired in the first place. And that, presumably, is why the school fired him today. Cracker-box facilities, lack of tradition, and academic pressure...

No Holds Are Barred When It Comes To The Duke-UNC Rivalry, Including Brutal Lacrosse Nutshots
Discussion of the Tobacco Road rivalry between Duke and North Carolina usually focuses on basketball, but the two teams have long had a national presence in men's lacrosse. Both squads are ranked again this season, and last night's 11-8 Blue Devils victory in Chapel Hill wasn't without the bitter, t...

Some Of The Greatest Games in NBA History, Re-Scored Under North Korean Rules
CORRECTION: An earlier version of this post misstated one of North Korea's unique scoring rules. Scores within the last three seconds, not minutes, count for eight points. The corrected version is below....

Three Good Reasons To Doubt That An Unheralded Receiver Actually Ran A 4.19 40-Yard Dash
Northern Iowa receiver Terrell Sinkfield wowed scouts at the University of Minnesota's pro day on Monday. According to "reports" (more on that later), Sinkfield ran the 40-yard dash in a time of 4.19 seconds. It's easy and tempting to take at face value, because it'd be a wonderful story. A no-name ...

Dennis Rodman Reportedly Kicked Out Of Hotel Bar For Talking About How Rad Kim Jong Un Is
We'll just let the lede from this story in the New York Post speak for itself, because it is great:...

One More Stupid Thing About That Stupid Rick Reilly Column
Sean gave Rick Reilly's column a thorough fisking earlier, but here's one more thing. Remember: The conceit is that these are Dennis Rodman's hypothetical reports from present-day global hot spots. Emphasis mine:...

Rick Reilly's Dennis Rodman Column, Explained
Rick Reilly dropped another column today and I figure we should just break it down for everyone because, if you're anything like me, a lot of the higher-brow jokes sometimes goes right over your head. So, we're going to workshop this one....

Toni Kukoc May Be In Danger
Since we are talking mid-nineties Bulls players, we are also talking Kim Jong Un. Apparently Dennis Rodman was not the first member of the Chicago juggernaut to meet Kim Jong Un. That honor belongs to...Toni Kukoc? Apparently, so!...

Rodman: Kim Jong Un Wants Obama To Call Him
Dennis Rodman is back from his whirlwind tour of North Korea and he comes with some interesting news: Kim Jong Un is basically Mikey from Swingers....

North Korea Invented Its Own, Totally Different Way Of Scoring Basketball Games
Dennis Rodman's bizarre visit to North Korea has led to many dissections of North Korea's strange relationship with basketball—or rather, the Kim family's strange relationship with basketball—and one happy consequence is the opportunity to remember that, despite the Kim family's love for the NBA, th...

The U.S. State Department Actually Clarified That Dennis Rodman "Has Never Been A Player In Our Diplomacy"
In case you were wondering:...

Kim Jong Un And Dennis Rodman Are Now Friends For Life
Curious about how gigantic weirdo Dennis Rodman's trip to North Korea is going? It's going great! Today, Rodman took in an exhibition basketball game with North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un. They watched members of the Harlem Globetrotters take on a North Korean "dream team," and then became besties...

Dennis Rodman Is Going To North Korea, <i>The</i> Dennis Rodman Is Going To <i>The</i> North Korea
There's not much time so listen up. Go to the grocery store. Buy a bunch of canned items and non-perishable goods. Fig Newtons? I don't know. Chef Boyardee or something. Just get food. Also, buy a whole shitload of water. And even more pots to hold extra water....

Fans Dress In KKK Hoods At A North Dakota High School Hockey Game, Coach Calls It "Pretty Tacky"
And that was the better response from a school administrator. Someone is either very handy with the Photoshop and committed to making North Dakota-area high schoolers look bad, or there are some extreeemely intolerant and/or stupid North Dakota-area high schoolers. From The Grand Forks Herald:...

Someone Impaled The Duke Mascot's Head On A Stake Above UNC's Campus Store
Duke hosts North Carolina tonight—right now, in fact—and the Cameron Crazies had a bit of a scare this morning. Some Tobacco Road charlatans stole the Duke mascot's head (maybe more?) and stuck it on a stake above the Chapel Hill bookstore....
