not Page 36 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

"Celtic" Delonte West Gets Into A Locker-Room Fight With Von "Who?" Wafer
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

More Stories About Terrifying Hydraulic Lifts From Football Videographers
Earlier, we brought you Anonymous's account of videotaping football practice from a scissor lift under circumstances similar to those that precipitated Declan Sullivan's death. Readers sent in their own experiences with the perils of videotaping from lifts....

The Day I Thought I'd Die On A Scissor Lift: What It's Like To Do The Job That Killed Declan Sullivan
Notre Dame would like you to believe that the death of Declan Sullivan Wednesday was a tragic accident but an isolated one, a sad case of bad weather conspiring with terrible misfortune. And that would be wrong....

How A Notre Dame Student Died, And Why He Shouldn't Have
At precisely 4:50 pm, a 50-foot scissor lift tower collapsed in winds exceeding 50 mph, killing the 20-year-old student filming football practice for the team. It shouldn't have come to that....

Notre Dame Students Plan To Rush The Field For Historic Loss
The Fighting Irish are perched on the brink of an unprecedented accomplishment: the losingest class in school history. Clearly this must be celebrated....

In The Navy, You Can Lick Your Gap-Toothed Pal's Ear If You Beat Notre Dame
Navy hadn't won consecutive games against the Fighting Irish since 1960-61. They won last year. They won today. Hence, the traditional seaman celebration was called for. (H/T Matthew Kelley)...

Your College Football Early Games Thread
For potential heart-attack fetishists, there's Illinois at Michigan State. For sadists, B.C. at Florida State or Minnesota at Purdue. For the righteous/godless, Western Michigan at Notre Dame. For college-football addicts, there's Missouri at Texas A&M and Vanderbilt at Georgia....

Let's All Admire Umpire Hunter Wendelstedt's Rather Large Human Element
What you see here, courtesy of Brooks Baseball, is a plot of Hunter Wendelstedt's whimsical strikezone from yesterday's Yankees-Twins game. The red marks were called strikes; the green ones were balls. No, that's not how a strikezone is supposed to look....

So, What's Mrs. Tom Brady Doing With This Guy Who Isn't Mr. Tom Brady? (With Update!)
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Here's A Video Of Tony Kornheiser Teaching Bill Simmons How To Wear A Tie
The Sports Fella's hosting PTI for the rest of the week, so it looks like we'll be watching PTI this week. There you go, indeed, Tony. H/T Trey Kerby....

Controversial World Cup Referee Busted With Whole Lotta Heroin At Airport
Byron Moreno, a former FIFA referee was arrested at JFK airport with over six KG of heroin. According to Google Translate translation, Moreno was controversial, "bleeped in Korea," and hid "the drug in her underwear." Got it. [CRE Satelital]...

God Gave Mark Dantonio A Heart Attack For Beating Notre Dame, Says Soon-To-Be-Suspended Radio Guy
We said it's time to let the MSU/ND game go. Matt Patrick, of a South Bend talk radio station, should probably have read us before he insinuated that God struck Dantonio down for cheating against the Catholics....

Definitive Proof That Time Expired Before MSU's Miracle, And Why It Doesn't Matter
An enterprising soul has gone frame-by-frame and determined that the Spartans' ballsy fake should never have counted. And yet, the refs called the play exactly as they should have....

Weekend Winner: Sparty's Balls (If Not His Vascular System)
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Michigan State coach Mark Dantonio, who beat Notre Dame on a wonderfully idiotic fake field goal in overtime and then survived a "minor" heart attack....

The One Where Erin Andrews And Kirk Herbstreit Rumors Resurface
Welcome back to Deleted Scenes. If you're new, read this to figure out what we do here. If not, well, let's get down to business....

Tiger Woods Can't Stop Swearing, Breaking Promises To Stop Swearing
Tiger Woods, whether he's chastising himself or enthusiastically congratulating a friend, cannot stop swearing—around his kids, no less. Oh fuck no....

Manny to Boston, Youk: Lo Siento Mucho, Bros
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

The Boring Bag! Your Temporary Fun Bag Replacement
While the Funbag is away, we still play, albeit dully. Time for The Boring Bag!...

BYU Gets Themselves A TV Deal, Inter-Sect Rivalry
Newly-independent BYU signed a 6-game deal to play Notre Dame in the "Protestants Don't Consider Either One Christians" Bowl Series....

Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape Theater: Toni Kukoc
Welcome to Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape Theater, the frequent feature where we examine fan-made video love letters to athletes and their baffling soundtrack choices. Today's superstar: the Croatian Sensation, Toni Kukoc, set to Michael Jacksons's "Remember The Time."...