ns Page 2189 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Hockey Player Misses Five Minutes Of Game Time With Broken Face, Returns In Time For Season-Losing Goal
Your morning roundup for May 29, the day after death told the world that the puffy-faced Grandma Bandit was actually a man....
This Memorial Day Weekend, Don't Forget To Prepare For The Penis Inspector
As far as we know, this isn't real. Carlmont High (Calif.) students don't have to "ensure that their penises are clean and orderly," nor do they have to procure a friend's pubes if they have trimmed their own. It's a senior prank, and a well-executed one at that....
A Video Compilation Of Silly Tribute Songs To Man U Striker Chicharito
In advance of the Champions League final tomorrow between Manchester United and Barcelona, here's an amusing video about Javier "Chicharito" Hernandez, the dynamic Mexican striker who's been a vital part of Man U's success this year. Hay salsa. Hay rap. Hay awesomeness at 02:20. Make sure you get ...
Watch Miami Fans Celebrate Like They Just Won A Title
For all we know, these diehard fans in their bright whites (never washed) really do think it's over and that the Heat are champions. They haven't been watching basketball that long, you see....
Mets Manager Just As Dumb As Mets Owners, Carlos Beltran Is His Whore
Any of you know what the hell this means? Backward, defeatist: these are your New York Mets, with their fearless skipper leading the charge....
Here's The Video Where LeBron James Takes Flopping To Heretofore Unseen Levels
Your morning roundup for May 27, the day it helps to have a background in mathematics if you want to work for Pauly Shore. Video H/T Allen W...
We Are All Dave McKenna CXI
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit runs out of ways to die in this space....
Real Estate Broker By Day Is Jerkoff Softball Coach By Night
As summer comes on, co-ed rec leagues across the country are forced to deal with power-hungry coaches who've memorized the inspirational speeches from Miracle and Any Given Sunday. Today's coach has a novel form of encouragement: enforcing a fine for any outs made. Our forwarder notes that this is "...
Only A Jets Fan Keeps Vince Lombardi's Grave From Being A Neglected Embarrassment
Vince Lombardi was buried with his wife and parents in a little cemetery in Northern New Jersey. Almost immediately, it was abandoned to the elements....
Buster Posey's Foot Bent The Wrong Way After A Home Plate Collision Last Night
Scott Cousins sealed a Marlins win in the 12th inning last night, by way of a full-force collision with Giants catcher Buster Posey at home plate. The tackle left Posey with a serious leg injury (in the last second-to-last angle here, especially, you can see his right ankle bend in such a way that...
Phillies Infielder Throws 10-Pitch 19th Inning To Close Out Joey Votto And The Reds
Your morning roundup for May 26, the day after Disney realized that it probably wasn't the best of ideas to trademark American heroes for profit....
Your Bruins/Lightning Game Six Open Thread
So, Boston heads into the St. Pete Times Forum with an opportunity to advance past the Lightning and into the team's first Stanley Cup Finals appearance since 1990....
The Boom Goes The Dynamite Guy Tries His Hand At Intentional Comedy
This post is, of course, half public apology to the friends of Deadspin I may have offended last week, when I did not really know who Daniel Tosh was and, accordingly, did not give him due respect when Manny Pacquiao punched him in the face....
Satirical, Non-Libelous Dan Snyder Group Fiction, Part IV: Cooke And Bligle Jim Escape To The Potomac
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit chokes on a crab puff at a cocktail party. (For those of you keeping track, this is "We Are All Dave McKenna CX.")...
Bryan Stow's Lawyer Rips The Dodgers' Lack Of Security, Sympathy
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the lawyer hired by Stow's family to sue the Dodgers outlines exactly what the team could ha...
The Five Geniuses You Meet In Heaven: Mitch Albom Discovers The Apple Store
After that whole thing about him winning a Red Smith Award that he probably shouldn't have won, Albom's stayed out of the spotlight. Or, wait, no: He's written a play and developed a TNT show. And, somewhere along the way, he found time to visit the Apple Store and write about it....
Kobe Wants More Of A Say In Who Will Be The Lakers' Sideline Prop
The Lakers are reportedly set to hire former Cavs coach Mike Brown to succeed Phil Jackson. Actual coach/GM Kobe Bryant is said to be "surprised" by the news because he expected to see L.A. assistant Brian Shaw promoted to the position and was "not a part of the decision-making process." [SI]...
David Beckham Secures A Post-Soccer Future In Field Security With This Fan Takedown
English soccer clubs sometimes play "testimonials," in which they bring back their older stars for a friendly match of former rivals. Like parades or bowling parties, it's a nice way to make the old folk feel appreciated for still being around. Yesterday, with Man United playing Juventus in the Ga...
Bernard Hopkins Finally Explains His Loathing For Donovan McNabb And How He Can "Look Through A Man's Soul"
You might recall that before he became the oldest boxing champ in history last weekend, Bernard Hopkins had some choice words for Donovan McNabb, who never had much truck with the boxer, aside from neglecting to shake his hand when Hopkins visited the Eagles training center in 2004. Never one to let...
Today In "You Don't Fucking Say"
Headline on a story that checked in at 1,655 words and required the contributions of 10 Associated Press reporters: "Drinking linked to problems in the ballpark stands." [AP]...