ns Page 2190 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Barry Bonds Will Pay To Send Beaten Giants Fan's Kids To College
This is actually great: Barry Bonds, the star of Bob Costas's nightmares, will provide scholarships for Bryan Stow's two grade-school-age children. Stow was brutally beaten at Dodger Stadium in March for wearing a Giants jersey. His condition is slowly improving, and police recently arrested a suspe...

For Just $400,000, You Can Buy This Portland-Based Co-Ed Kickball Team
From Deadspin's Portland Bureau—tipster Scott—comes a rec league kickball story. Sorry. Keep in mind this Craigslist ad was originally all in caps:...

All The Unkind Things Bill Simmons Said About His Colleagues In The ESPN Book
One of the most interesting characters to emerge from the ESPN book is the formerly inscrutable Bill Simmons, if only because we've never heard him be so (openly) self-aware before. He again whips out the big swinging dick in some more excerpts....

We Are All Dave McKenna CIX
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit finds its way into the wood chipper....

Tortured Analogy Leads Tiki Barber To Declare Himself A "Reverse Anne Frank"
The Tiki Barber image rehab tour kicks off in earnest (remember, he's planning to play again) with a big Sports Illustrated profile dropping tomorrow. In it, he tells a story of the time he went into hiding in the attic of his agent, Mark Lepselter....

After Poker Seizures, Justice Department Comes For Online Sportsbooks
Hello, folks. Welcome back to Bad Beats, the column you visit for betting advice and sad tales of gambling woe. Read past Bad Beats here. Got any stories for us? Email us at [email protected]. Subject: Bad Beats....

Who Wants To Publicly Shame Some Gnome-Happy Brewers Fans?
The Brewers and the Milwaukee Parks Department teamed up to hide 1000 of these little Bernie Brewer gnomes along the Lakefront, with the public free to take one if they found it. Well, some folks got there at 3 a.m. and started taking as many as their cars could hold. And of course, they're selling ...

Ja'Juan Story Sincerely Regrets Telling Everyone His Doodoo Story
Last week, we brought you the charming story of Florida football recruit Ja'Juan Story, who abandoned all interview protocol and told Gator Country that he prepares for games by "taking a doodoo" and listening to Katy Perry songs. Today, we're sorry to report that he has reneged on his claims, and w...

MLB Will Probably Ask Us To Remove That George W. Bush Foul Ball Video, So Here's A Shitty Drawing I Made
You can watch it here, for now, but I think my drawing better conveys the emotional truth of the moment. Hope you like it....

Secret Service Can't Protect George W. Bush From Foul Ball
They'll take a bullet for the former president, but they can't save him from a lazy foul pop into the box seats in Arlington. Neither could A.J. Pierzynski:...

Here's Tim Thomas With The Best Save Of The Playoffs
That endorsement from hockey minds across Twitter tonight. Steve Downie, in a one-goal game, would probably agree....

Here's A Photo Of Every Single Tampa Bay Lightning Fan
All 800 of them, sending their beloved team off yesterday. Organized on Facebook (of course) and by the team (grassroots it is not), every single man woman or child that roots or ever rooted for the Lightning gathered in a parking lot at Tampa International Aiport and stood in the shape of a lightni...

We Are All Dave McKenna CVIII
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit self-immolates in shame....

Jose Canseco Tweets Obsession With Lady Gaga, But He Spurned Madonna, So...
Okay, I suppose there are a lot of things a little wrong with Jose Canseco's latest Twitter freakout, but there's a whole plane full of parallels we can't miss. And those parallels make this much more than the ramblings dribbling out of a disgraced slugger's Dorito-dusted fingers....

Half-Marathon Finisher Gets Caught Cheating, Is A Dog
Here's Dozer the Goldendoodle crossing the finish line of the Maryland Half Marathon last week. Already he's become something of a local legend, with media interviewing his owner and volunteers pledging thousands of dollars in donations on his official runner page. But something's not right. Look ...

Meet The Blackjack Superhero Who Took Atlantic City For $15 Million
Two weeks ago, we learned about the gambling ace who saddled the Tropicana Casino and Resort with a record $5.8 million loss at the blackjack tables in April. There was much speculation about his identity. Now, there is an answer. The Press of Atlantic City scored an interview with the gambler, an O...

Ian Poulter's Path To Victory At The World Match Play Championship Included A Spill Down A Hill
Congratulations go out to Ian Poulter who "confirmed his reputation as one of golf's most indefatigable competitors on Sunday as he capped a succession of comeback wins at the Volvo World Match Play Championship in Spain with a yet another unlikely victory, over Luke Donald in the final."...

We Are All Dave McKenna CVII
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit succumbs to the evils of which Ray Lewis has foretold....

The Evil Arrests That Ray Lewis Was Talking About Have Already Started
Free-agent backup running back Garrett Wolfe, late of the Chicago Bears, was charged with retail theft, disorderly conduct, assaulting a police officer and resisting arrest with violence in Miami this morning. This was Wolfe's first newsworthy event since Wednesday when he spoke to the Chicago Sun-...

Today In Great Quotes: Ray Lewis On How Evil Pertains To The Lockout
"Do this research if we don't have a season — watch how much evil, which we call crime, watch how much crime picks up, if you take away our game," Ray Lewis told ESPN's Sal Paolantonio....