ns Page 2287 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Charles Barkley Just Up And Calls Everyone "Assholes"
After a question of curious taste, Barkley is rendered speechless — no mean feat. Well, he does manage to get out one notable word....
Who Is The <em>SportsCenter</em> Farter This Time?
During an impassioned discussion on the Cleveland Browns, someone on the SportsCenter NFL draft panel cut one, just as Mike Tirico began to giggle. Was this a laughter-induced fart or fart-induced laughter? Who is the flatulent panelist? Deadspin-I-Team, assemble. H/T Steve....
Another Entry For The "Big Ben Is A Cockbag" File
A senior at Pitt passed along more tales about the putrid personality of the (allegedly) ashen-cocked quarterback. It turns out Roethlisberger's assholery is not reserved just for female bar patrons....
Football Players Get Themselves Charged With Weed Cultivation In Solemn Observance Of Today's Date
Four Louisiana at Lafayette football players were arrested this morning and subsequently suspended indefinitely from the team for alleged cultivation of marijuana. Can't we celebrate Jessica Lange's birthday without the law busting in? [The Advertiser]...
MLB PED Suspension Imminent, Submit Your Wild Speculation PDQ (UPDATE: We Have A Winner)
Rumors say that a "semi-big" Major League Baseball player is about to be suspended for a performance enhancing drug violation. To win the game, you must identify the player, the drug and the ESPN personality they will tearfully "confess" to....
Big Ben's Woman Problems The Result Of Stunted Psychosexual Development, Says Guy Who Writes About Sports
Ben Roethlisberger mistreats women because he has "deep-seated" issues relating to his childhood separation from his mother-figure. "I think Ben needs help," writes Mike Klis of The Denver Post, who when he's not diagnosing psychosocial pathologies usually writes about the Broncos....
It's White Supremacy Night At Safeco Field
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
DeShawn Stevenson's Horrifying Neck Tattoo Would Like To Invite You To Watch Basketball
Abe Lincoln: our 16th President. Legendary orator. Possible vampire hunter. And now he's back, in ink form, to get Mavs fans riled up. Jesus Christ, it's got teeth....
LeBron Puts James Johnson On A Poster
LeBron gives us a thunderous dunk over the hapless Johnson, followed by a scream that's television gold. We now return you to your regularly-scheduled, non-LeBron posting....
Family Rushes To Vomiting Fan's Defense In Eminently Quotable Fashion
Now I'm no Perry Mason, but I'd say that if your defense rests in part on there being a distinction between a right person and a wrong person on whom to ralph, your case is lost already....
Lone, Courageous Voice Rises In Praise Of Boston Sports
National columnist Lil' Dan O'Shaughnessy introduces us to a sleepy Northeastern burg that you probably don't know the name of, but actually has several professional sports franchises! (Ergo, they are also the best.) Oh, brother.... [SI]...
A New Big Ben Exposure Story: “He Had A Gray Penis"
Plenty of ladies these days have a story about unwanted exposure to Ben Roethlisberger's penis. Here's an account we received from reader Running Man Territory Dan. It's unverified and possibly totally fabricated. Still, A GRAY PENIS?!...
Fans Oddly Excited To Meet Guy Impersonating Capitals Owner
Not happy with Washington's lackluster first round so far? Blame this guy who sort of looks like Ted Leonsis. [DC Sports Bog/Ted's Take]...
William Houston Still Shaking His Fist
Angry Billy Houston has a lengthy to-and-fro with Pension Plan Puppets. "Truth is, you're a pathetic piece of shit who can't function as a real journalist so you operate that awful blog," writes the former journalist who now operates a blog. [PPP]...
Here's Your Annual Wet USC Song Girls
An excellent palate-cleanser during the most jam-packed sports weekend in a while. The Song Girls hit the pool for a good cause (a charity, not your shameful urges). [BeatSC.com]...
Get Ready For The Worst Sports Show Ever
A helpful reader was trolling Craigslist when he stumbled across a casting call for a new sports/talk/comedy show. And man, does it sound terrible (and not just because Joumana Kidd is hosting)....
Apropos Of Nothing, Here's Phillies Vomit Kid Doing Madonna Karaoke
Mean-spirited? Yeah, a little. Only tangentially related to sports? Sure. But fuck it. Here's Matthew Clemmens (stage name: Pukemon) with "Material Girl."...
Strikeforce Post-Bout Brawl Is Childish, Exciting
Jake Shields was confronted during a post-fight interview by Jason "Mayhem" Miller demanding a rematch (Shields beat him in November). Because MMA wants to be the new boxing, their entourages got into it. Bonus: Gus Johnson gets righteous!...
William Houston Doesn't Handle Criticism Well
Billy Houston, after taking potshots at bloggers in two consecutive posts and catching hell for it, resorts to a totally legitimate journalistic strategy: deleting all the comments on one, and deleting the second post altogether. [Truth & Rumours]...
A Blow-By-Blow Account Of The Vomiting Phillies Fan
In our #tips section, we received a purported firsthand account from someone sitting in the same section as Matthew Clemens, the New Jersey man accused of throwing up on an 11-year-old girl. We reprint it here for your reading pleasure....