of Page 592 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Everybody Loves Kurt Warner...Except One Former California Pizza Kitchen Employee
Kurt Warner just can't stop winning over NFL fans with his sage quarterbacking and stock boy humbleness, so even if he doesn't make it to Canton we can all agree he's an exceptional human being, right? Behold a dissenter....

According To This Man's Pus-Filled Foot, The Vikings Are The New Team Of Destiny
Just look at this man's foot. A reader, who wishes to remain anonymous, noticed the throbbing blister resembled the Vikings' helmet horn, thus guaranteeing victory. Or possible amputation due to diabetes, but let's stay positive....

Go For The Thighs. Your Open Mailbag Tuesday
Time for your Deadspin Open Mailbag Tuesday. Email us here or submit your questions via Twitter. This week, we're covering skyjerking, thighs, world capitals, cereal, tacos and more....

Rutgers Basketball Is Frying Up A "Steak Of Turmoil"
Former Scarlet Knight J.R. Inman played three years for Rutgers coach Fred Hill, but recently published a long Facebook diatribe where he advocated a strong pro-"punching Fred Hill in the face" stance. Why so much hate?...

Defense Wins The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like NFL defensive units who shut down their opponents and made all the difference in first-round playoff wins. When they bothered to show up....

Hawk About To Get Paid Hawking Autographs
Having a plaque in Cooperstown is nice. The unstated-but-significant financial windfall that comes with being a hall-of-famer could be nicer....

Togo Withdraws From Tournament After Machine-Gun Attack; 4 Dead, Reportedly
Togo has pulled out of the Africa Cup of Nations, with perhaps other teams to follow, in the aftermath of Friday's attack by Angolan separatists. A backup goalkeeper, two staff members, and the driver all were killed, the Guardian reports....

Wizards Now Pretending Gilbert Arenas Never Existed
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

BREAKING: Jim Mora Fired
Jay Glazer just tweeted the news a couple minutes ago. And Glazer is blissfully never wrong. I've always thought Jim Mora 2 looks like an Eskimo. That's probably a wrong assumption....

Presenting The Absolute Worst Hall Of Fame Voter (Update)
In all the foofaraw over the HOF elections, one voter stands above the rest in terms of sheer ineptitude and self-promotion. Let's ridicule them! But first, the runners up:...

Robbie Alomar Can Only Think Of One Reason He's Not In The Hall Yet
"His first phone call was to umpire John Hirschbeck, to reassure him there was no hard feelings over the spitting incident and he in no way felt Hirschbeck was responsible." Yeah, no shit the spittee's not responsible. [Stalking Steve Phillips]...

The 2009 Oakland Raiders: A Season Of Failure
The Oakland Raiders were once a proud, victorious franchise, but despite zero ownership changes in over 30 years they become an organization synonymous with "ineptitude." The 2009 campaign didn't reverse this spectacular descent....

Tony La Russa Is Screwing With Baseball Writers' Heads
Self-important blowhard manager loosely speculating about pinch-hitting Mark McGwire this season vs. self-important blowhard media collective accusing him of dicking around with Mark McGwire's Hall of Fame clock: Who ya got? [NYDN]...

"I Really Have Nothing To Say": 13 Years Of Sad Bert Blyleven Reactions
Every year, poor Bert Blyleven falls short of Cooperstown, and every year, he's asked how it feels. Looking back on 13 years of his glum responses is almost heartbreaking, like watching a frown in slow motion....

Star Spitting Is Worst Thing To Happen In Dallas Since Kennedy Assassination
An Eagles fan/employee "defiled" Cowboys Stadium with a vicious (and viscous) attack on the city of Dallas, football fans, and basic human decency. He spit on the star at midfield. Twice. Hey, that artificial turf is expensive to steam clean!...

BBWAA Spits In Alomar's Face, Elects Andre Dawson
The Hawk and his sweet-ass theme song are in the Hall of Fame. Greatest second baseman of the last 30 years? Never heard of him. [MSF/MLB]...

The 2009 Cleveland Browns: A Season Of Failure
The Cleveland Browns are not the worst team in the NFL. Yet, front office chaos, locker room drama, and a lot of lousy football have made them exemplars of what it means to be a terrible sports franchise....

Reruns Win The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the NFL teams who beat another team just to win the right to play that same team again. Why did they even bother?...

In ESPN's Defense, I'm Pretty Sure They Accept Passports As Valid I.D.
During their coverage of this afternoon's International Bowl (now involving two countries!), ESPN2 did a fly-by of some of the splendors of downtown Toronto. Naturally, they included the historic Zanzibar strip club, which I understand doubles as the American Embassy....

The Edmonton Oilers Will Pay For Shooters By the Bottle Or Not At All
The following story pits millionaire athletes versus a publicity seeking, possible-price-gouging restaurateur. And you will be required to choose sides. This is one of them moral quandaries, like when you're attracted to pictures of your wife when she was fourteen....