oh Page 338 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Sports News On A Sportsless Day
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
It's Not Officially A No-Hitter Until You Drink With A Panda
Some might tell you that Jonathan Sanchez's good luck charm was his father watching him pitch for the first time as a pro. Those people are about to learn of the Power of the Panda....
Blackhawks GM Fired For Not Following Example Set By Cubs
Dale Tallon took over a terrible post-lockout Blackhawks franchise, combined shrewd drafting and solid free agent picks to build a young, exciting contender and was rewarded for his efforts with a swift kick in the pants. That's the Chicago way....
Yes, It's For A Completely Different Individual, Who's Not Me
"My grandson is 'in love' with Shawn Johnson, the Olympic gymnast. Do you know where I could get an 8 by 10 picture or poster of her?" [Cape Cod Times]...
Nice, But He Still Gets An Asterisk For Doing It Against The Padres
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Chad Ochocinco Tweets By His Own Rules
Ochocinco: "I'm using Twitter during games." NFL: No, you're not. Ochocinco: "Damn NFL and these rules, I am going by my own set of rules, I ain't hurting nobody or getting in trouble, I am putting my foot down!!" [PFT]...
Somehow, Michael Jackson Was Partly Responsible For Magic Johnson's Greatness
I applaud Magic Johnson's ability to personalize it: "the way he controlled the band...the stage." But I'm sure he'd use the same approach if he were eulogizing a painter or a vacuum cleaner repairman. [Gawker]...
Terrell Owens and Joanna Krupa Rise From The Dead
ABC made a mistake when they somehow let the onlymost marketable face on their game show get booted off in the first week. Well, thanks to the magic of television that's all a distant memory!...
Scoring At Home: Your <em>SportsCenter</em> Catchphrase-O-Meter
An occasional feature in which we explain and evaluate a SportsCenter anchor's pet phrase. Today's phrase: "Winner winner chicken dinner."...
John Feinstein Has Bypass Surgery
Feinstein, author of 4,285 books and a new, now poignantly named blog, writes: "The angiogram showed 'four to six,' blockages in my heart-one of them 100 percent." He went under the knife yesterday. [Feinstein on the Brink]...
Larry Johnson Spends Evening Out With Women At A Club And Does Not Assault Any Of Them
Congratulations go out to Kansas City Chiefs running back Larry Johnson, who appears to have beaten the odds by spending a weekend in Vegas with numerous females(?) without any charges being filed. So far....
This Love Has Taken Its Toll On Me
Red Sox owner John Henry got married yesterday, and held his reception in Fenway's outfield, with the best guest list ever: Larry David, Ken Burns, Alan Dershowitz, the Farrelly Brothers, and Bud Selig. The live band: Maroon 5. [Boston Globe]...
Kudos To The NBA Draft Seating Arrangement Planner
"Rick Pitino eventually sat in his seat while John Calipari... avoided his, which meant no awkward photos, and no opportunity for Kentucky fans to create Photoshops of him putting his feet in Pitino's hair." [SI]...
And It's Erin Calipari To The Rescue Again...
The amusing fake John Calipari Facebook page that was accumulating many gullible Kentucky "friends" at an alarming rate is finished. And only one person could stop this devious fake Calipari from perpetrating anymore dupes upon an unsuspecting Wildcat nation....
The Superstars Loses Its Superstar
By now you've certainly seen the video of Joanna Krupa going all Terrell Owens on....Terrell Owens (language NSFW), but if you didn't actually watch "The Superstars" last night than you must hate Americana and apple pie, baby....
Fake John Calipari Is Terrorizing Facebook...And Other Things Of Note
Yes, fake Facebooks/Twitterers are everywhere and the joke is extremely stale, but that won't prevent hundreds of Wildcat rubes from believing a John Calipari impostor is the actual John Calipari engaging them in jovial and revealing conversation. Oh Kentucky....
Breaking: North Carolina Natives Prefer Ol' Roy To Coach K
Roy Williams has a higher in-state approval rating than Mike Krzyzewski, but here's the shock statistic: Only 14 percent have an "unfavorable opinion" of K. Must be that we (part-time) North Carolinians put country first. [Under The Dome, PPP]...
John Daly's Bus Does Not Fit In There
John Daly's Magic Bus continues to roll around the country, but it's running a little bit lower than usual after he knocked off the top going through a low-clearance tunnel....
Damon, Swisher Continue Their Cunnilingual Rock N' Roll Party
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...