on Page 5551 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

College Students Celebrate Bin Laden's Death With Patriotic Backflips, Nudity, Beer: A Gallery
In celebration of the fact that Osama bin Laden was announced dead last night, American college students everywhere took it upon themselves to riot in the streets, drunkenly yell their college rally chants on national television, and light couches on fire. Oh, America....

Grantland.com Published Some Crazy Lady Yakking About The Knicks
Forget about all the in-house melodrama resulting from the project, please be sure to check out our girl Bakes do her thing. Yes, ESPN.com is sneak-previewing today. "The Garden of Good and Evil" is on my summer reading list, for sure. [Grantland.com]...

A Case Study In Incompetence: Dan Snyder's PR Guy, Tony Wyllie
Maybe you heard about the stunning display of asshattedness last week by Redskins proto-flack Tony Wyllie. The occasion: A University of Maryland College of Journalism “ethics in sports media” panel, to which Wyllie arrived late. Dan Snyder’s dumbass libel suit came up, at which point Wyllie offere...

In Which The Patriots President Blames The Lockout On The Players With A Straight Face
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: seriously, if you buy this, you should be dragged out into the street and shot....

Some Drunk Giants Players Got Into It With Drunk Capitals Fans At A Hockey Game
In town to play the Nationals, a few members of the San Francisco Giants took in the Lightning/Capitals game yesterday. According to a fan who was there, there was some good-natured ribbing going on with the next luxury box over, including Pat Burrell telling a screaming fan that the players on the ...

An Essay About Osama Bin Laden's Death, Constructed Entirely Out Of Athletes' Tweets
SOURCES: OSAMA BIN LADEN IS DEAD!!! WATCHING CNN NOW... THE PRESIDENT TO ADDRESS THE NATION SHORTLY... I got off the plane,went in my hotel rm, turned on TV, saw all those people outside the WH and thought "did the Skins win another SB?" LOL. Osama Bin Laden dead????? Whoa!!!! Osama Bin Laden Dead. ...

Today In Terrifying Ledes
"Police say a supporter has been shot dead following a Brazilian soccer game that was interrupted by a swarm of bees and ended with a brawl between players on the field." [AP]...

Why Yes, One Cleveland Writer Did Make Osama Bin Laden's Death About LeBron James
And it wasn't Scott Raab (yet)....

They're Still Playing That Crazy-Ass, Everything-At-Once Sport Called Kronum
Hickey went and checked out a new rec league for the fledgling sport-clusterfuck Kronum just outside of Philadelphia over the weekend. "Here's what I ask people," founder Bill Gibson tells the Metro. "Do you listen to your grandparents' music? Well, why are you playing your grandparents' sports?" [M...

Mark Sanchez's Childhood Best Friend, Now A Jet, Was Once A Horrible, Malevolent Teenager
On Saturday, the Jets drafted Scotty McKnight, a wide receiver from Colorado, in the seventh round, in large part because Mark Sanchez spoke highly of McKnight. The two have been friends since age 9....

Bin Laden's Death Means Something Or Other For The NFL Lockout, According To Some Shit Mike Florio Threw At The Wall
Osama Bin Laden is dead, and people are happy, but if we don't have professional football on 9/11, people will be super-sad. This is Mike Florio's argument today. I am not joking, and neither, that I can tell, is Florio....

And Now A Picture Of The Worst Custom Heat Jersey Ever Made
In honor of the Heat/Celtics series, this guy has made a video of how to wash your car and clean your ceiling fan with a Paul Pierce jersey. And he did it all while wearing this obnoxious custom-made Big Three jersey....

Snapshot Of America: A Scene From The Philadelphia Crowd
Says reader Scott, who sent this in: "a red-faced, toothless whiskey tango of a Phillies fan taking a pack of Camels back from his kid is quite outstanding." Yes, yes he is. Click to enlarge for your full-size commemorative edition screengrab....

UFL To Conduct Player Draft On Twitter Tonight
You know one entity that was thrilled with the NFL lockout, nonplussed when a judge canceled it, and is probably glad that it's been reinstated? The UFL!...

Guy Who Is Not Even Suing Anyone Says Roger McDowell Made His Kid Cry
Roger McDowell is kind of a dick. You may have suspected this had you seen Gloria Allred's mildly erotic press conference last week. And you may have guessed it, too, when MLB suspended him yesterday for two weeks, without pay. But a few of you probably held reservations (because of Allred, because ...

On Steven Seagal And Lyoto Machida's Absurd Crane Kick Knockout Of Randy Couture
On Saturday night, Lyoto Machida landed a spectacular "Danielson" front kick to Randy Couture's jaw that dislodged a molar and sent Couture into retirement. Just as Anderson Silva did in February, when he knocked out Vitor Belfor with a similar kick, Machida credited Steven Seagal for helping him ...

Kings Have At Least One More Year Of Mediocre Basketball Ahead Of Them In Sacramento
"We're going to stay in Sacramento for another year," Kings co-owner George Maloof said today. "We appreciate [the fans'] loyalty to the franchise, and we're going to give Mayor [Kevin] Johnson another try to hopefully bring his vision to reality with a new arena." The vision had better include mone...

How ESPN Engineered Mark Ingram's Magic Moment
There was a very strange minute of television last week. After Ingram was drafted by New Orleans at No. 28 overall — the same position his father went in 1987 — Suzy Kolber presented/confronted the son with an email from the father....

In The Future, All Communications With Ohio State Will Be Via Billboard
It's always enjoyable to see OSU put their foot in their mouths, and it's even more fun to rub it in on the side of the highway. Hot on the heels of TCU's "Little Sisters of the Poor" billboards comes this simple-yet-effective taunt along I-94 in Michigan. [via]...

Future Robot Overlord Practices Snagging Human Skulls
On to the next war: the coming robot uprising. And — OH SHIT THEY CAN CATCH NOW....