on Page 5898 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
I Saw Mommy Kissing Nightmare Ant
Sure, it's a little early—unless you're Jewish—but everyone's favorite NBADL mascot would like to wish you a happy and healthy Non-Denominational Holiday Time ... with visions of unspeakable horror dancing in your heads....
Ndamukong Suh Gives People A Reason To Care About The Heisman
Nebraska's defensive tackle is the new sentimental favorite to win the Heisman Trophy, a famous award given annually by the media to whichever name they've written over and over again in their Hello Kitty diary....
Shock: Man Who Once Likened Airplanes To Time Machines Was Heavy Into Drugs
The great Marvin "I ain't getting on no time machine" Barnes tells Chris Tomasson he made roughly $50,000 a week selling weed during his playing days. Oh, and he did some drugs, too. [FanHouse]...
The One Where Mike Piazza Caused The Tiger Woods Mess
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....
All College Football Games To Be Settled By White Rapper Battles (Update!)
Not to be outdone by the only two guys in Iowa who listen to rap music, Georgia Tech fans would like to remind you about their opponents in the Orange Bowl of Awkward "Hip Hop" Videos, The GTGs. Lose yourself.......
Sitters Vs. Standers – The Great Wipe Hope
Today, we bring you a very special anthropological study that painstakingly details the bathroom finishing habits of the modern American male. Warning: things here are about to get a bit hairy....
Hank Gola Leaves The Yard
It was bound to happen eventually that a blushing sportswriter would pick up his crayons and write something about Tiger Woods so egregiously stupid that it'd make Mark Whicker look like Grantland Rice. Take it away, Hank Gola....
Man In Kurt Cobain Sweater Responsible For Sports Blog Of The Decade, SI Says
Other winners: Pro Football Talk, Fire Joe Morgan, The Big Lead, Bad Jocks, Awful Announcing, Sports By Brooks, True Hoop, The Spoiler. [SI]...
2009 SHOTY Nominee: Tiger Woods
A fortnight ago, no one would have ever expected Tiger Woods — Tiger freaking Woods! — to ever be a SHOTY nominee. Now, the poor guy might win....
Roller Derby Twins Make Good
That's odd. ESPN's Page 2 has a story from a blonde girl who lives with her twin sister in New York City and tried out for the local roller derby ... heyyyyyyy, wait a second.......
Bearcats Bid Un-Emotional Goodbye to Brian Kelly
Brian Kelly said farewell to his Cincinnati charges last night and many responded by kindly asking their ex-coach to mind both the door and the area where the Good Lord split him as he makes his way through it....
Last Night's Winner: Pirates Fans
In sports, everybody is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Pittsburgh's baseball fans, who don't have to be alone anymore. Cheering for championships are overrated anyway!...
Madness Is...A 49ers Taquería Mural
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Just Because He Tapes His Penis To His Thigh Is No Reason To Judge
"After David Akers nails 55 YD FG in practice, Jon Dorenbos exhalts in celebration, screaming, 'Einhorn's a man!'" [Via]...
If You're Breathing (And Maybe If Not) Someone Will Sanction Your MMA Fight
A five-time World's Strongest Man champion thinks his very specific skill set can translate to MMA. There's a reason he's never won the World's Smartest Man competition (no Polish jokes please)....
I Guess We've Solved All The Real Free Speech Issues
A Central Pennsylvania town is tackling the pernicious threat of Steelers fans. Now the ACLU's getting involved. This is going to be uglier than tonight's game....
Your Voting Is Bad And You Should Feel Bad
The early All-Star balloting numbers are in, and it looks like another year of the usual suspects: Kobe, LeBron, D-Wade, T-Mac...*record scratch*...
Michael David Barrett Will Be Doing His Peeping In Federal Prison
Erin Andrews' stalker will plead guilty, according to court documents filed today. His attorney says in a statement: "He apologizes to Ms. Andrews, and expresses his deep regret for his conduct that caused her so much pain." [AP, TMZ]...
Tiger's Teeth Apparently No Longer Perfect
Your evening Tiger update: The UK Sun is reporting that, on the morning of the accident, Elin did to her husband's teeth with a cell phone what she would later do to his SUV's rear window with a sand wedge....