on Page 5972 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Derek Jeter Scoffs At Your Puny MVP Award
The Yankee Coxswain is your Sports Illustrated Sportsman of the Year, because of his "dignity and elegance." Also? He's an excellent tipper and rarely kills hobos to wear their flesh. [SI]...
TMZ Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like TMZ, which might as well stand for "Tiger Media Zone" the way they've wrapped the Eldrick/Elin saga in a nice warm Snuggie of coverage....
Another Roughrider Goes Home Disappointed
The Saskatchewan Roughriders are not sticking the Grey Cup anywhere after last night's last-second defeat in the CFL championship. It's going to be a long winter up there....
Searching For....The Person Who Stole Grady Sizemore's Coffee Cup-Penis Photos From His Computer
Because Mr. Sizemore has requested an MLB detective help find the culprit. I'd check here and here, first, but it appears a Sizemore stalker still roams the internets. Be on high alert. Probably for this lady....
The Nets And You, You Big Loser
So, Lawrence Frank, fired by New Jersey. Is sparing a coach the notoriety of completing a historic losing streak doing him a favor, or just rubbing salt in the wound?...
Alouettes! Roughriders! It's the 97th Grey Cup!
The battle for the CFL championship kicks off in a few minutes (I think they have kickoffs), and we'll soon know once and for all which is the greatest football city on earth: Montreal or Regina. [CFL]...
It's Dead Coach Walking Day!
The first Sunday after the end of the regular season traditionally brings a flurry of firings and "resignations." Let's see who's on the chopping block, and which heads have already rolled....
Mike Penner Remembered, As He Should Be: A Journalist
Do yourself a favor and read the Times' obituary of Mike Penner. A sad end for someone so obviously conflicted about their life. [LA Times]...
Does It Make You Feel Better To Know You Weren't Favored To Begin With?
On a shortened Sunday slate, two huge upsets looked possible late. But that's why they play 60 minutes (or in Houston and Washington's cases, 45)....
Your Late Games Open Thread
Grab a snack from the kitchen (or, if you're JaMarcus Russell, a bag of Skittles from your waistband), and settle in for three hours of either Brett Favre or Matt Leinart. There are no winners....
Tiger Woods Respectfully Asks Media To Refer To His Wife As "Hero" And Not "Club-Wielding Crazy Lady"
Tiger Woods was supposed speak with the FHP at 3 p.m. He canceled again, giving the reckless, irresponsible media one more day to speculate on what the hell happened early Friday morning. He did release a statement though....
South Jersey Pep Rally Turns Into Jerry Bruckheimer Film
Did your high school have a Thanksgiving bonfire? Did it explode, shaking the ground for 7 miles around and injuring a firefighter? If not, then yours sucked. [Press Of Atlantic City]...
Canada A Little Sensitive About The Olympics
A reporter crossing the border into British Columbia was detained by agents fearful she might be coming over to criticize the Vancouver Games. After all, gotcha journalism is the worst kind of terrorism....
Honestly, This Story Is Like Christmas To Us
I choose to believe this: TMZ is reporting that Tiger told a friend that his wife had "gone ghetto," and he had to "to run to Zales to get a 'Kobe Special.'" [TMZ]...
USC Beats UCLA, But Schools Tie For First In Jackassery
"Beat SC Week" (or "Troy Week," depending on your affiliation) started off with a bang, but the game would have ended with a whimper — had Rick Neuheisel and Pete Carroll not acted like petulant brats, nearly precipitating a brawl....
Your Early Games Open Thread
Well, someone is convinced the country really wants to see the Redskins play. But after last week's Detroit/Cleveland showstopper, I promised the scheduling gods I'd never question their wisdom again. [The506]...
Bud Selig: Retrospecticus
In honor of the commish starting the three-year countdown clock until retirement, I thought it would be instructive to take a look at his tenure a fair and thorough manner: bullet points!...
So Easy, A Canadian Could Do It
Hey, look at that! Canada's universities held a real, honest-to-god college football playoff (43 years running), and the world didn't end. And nobody's bemoaning the lack of a San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl. [Photo: Tyler Ball/The Queen's Journal]...
Grady Sizemore Does His Bit To Increase Our Female Readership
Sizemore joins Santonio Holmes and Jeff Reed in the pantheon of Rust Belt athletes who take dong shots in the mirror with their cell phones. Grady's Ladies have declared a national holiday....
Franciscan Friar? Or Ochocinco Finding A Great Bargain?
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....