on Page 5987 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Punching A Crippled Child Will Not Get Your Soccer Ball Back
A 23-year-old woman in a dispute over a soccer ball with a wheelchair-bound 13-year-old boy at a children's hospital, slugged him right in the medical halo that was screwed into his skull. That's at least a yellow card, right? [DMN]...

Deadspin I-Team: Who Is Rick Reilly's Virtual Bodyguard?
Avid readers of Rick Reilly®'s Wikipedia entry might've noticed a recent change: It is now, in every sense of the word, toothless....

Mets Third Base Coach Does Not Like My Pants And Will Not Eat My Poop Sandwich (UPDATE)
One man who's managed to keep his sunny disposition during the Mets season from hell is smooth-talking third base coach Razor Shines. Now you can ask him yes/no questions in this virtual ad and he'll answer them. All of them....

ESPN Videos Now Include Their Own Blooper Reels, "Bitch"
The funniest part of any Burt Reynolds movie is when they roll the bloopers during the closing credits. So ESPN's video folks must have figured, "Why not just leave the part where Paul Severino starts swearing in this game preview?"...

MANAGER FIGHT!!!
As is customary when a player throws a fastball three feet behind a batter's back, umpires deliver a warning to both managers. Then they tap gloves and come out swinging! At least that's the way it should be....

Nick Schuyler Explains What Went Wrong
The lone survivor of the boating accident that took the lives of three football players gave his first news interview since being rescued from the waters of the Gulf of Mexico in March....

Layla Kiffin's Job Is To Look Pretty And Keep Her Husband's Masculinity Intact
"He's got a really big heart. He's a great dad. And, he's got a really soft side to him. He cries in the girl movies." [Tennessean]...

Why Your Team Sucks: Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Some people are fans of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Brendan Haywood Apologizes For Gay-Panicky Dig At Marbury
"I don't support or condemn homosexuality," Haywood explains agnostically, before diving into the comments and discoursing with the rabble on such matters as race, sexuality, the First Amendment and showering with men. [Yardbarker]...

Why Your Team Sucks: New Orleans Saints
Some people are fans of the New Orleans Saints. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the New Orleans Saints. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Bookies Have A Good Feeling About This Florida Team
The Florida Gators are a 73-point favorite in their home opener against Charleston Southern. You will never see a gambler work harder to find a parlay. [Wiz of Odds]...

She's The Man?
South African distance runner Caster Semenya will run in tonight's women's 800-meter final at the track and field world championships in Berlin, despite concerns that she's a dude pulling a reverse Yentl on the world....

Don Ohlmeyer Addresses Roethlisberger Story, Learns What "Ombudsman" Means
Former NBC executive Don Ohlmeyer actually opened his first ESPN ombudsman column by reciting the definition of "ombudsman" from the dictionary. And also like a bad graduation speech, he takes way too long to get to the point....

This Way To The Pajama Party Of The Dead
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

They Lost The 'Devil,' But The Rays Are Still Goth
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Nate Robinson Arrested, Trial By Twitter
The Knicks star was busted Tuesday afternoon for a minor technicality. No biggie. But it might have died there if not for that slayer of giants, leveler of playing fields, tattler to the stars: Twitter....

Major Leaguer Says What We're All Thinking, Likely To Be Fined For It
Jack Cust: "It's kind of funny they spent all that money on the Mitchell Report and a bunch of hearsay and the guy who made all the money off it happened to work for the Red Sox." [AP]...

Tough Actin' Keith Acton Is The Only Lucky Maple Leaf
The good news: The former player won nearly $100,000 in Canada's national lottery. The bad news: $100k isn't nearly enough to quit his job as Toronto's assistant coach. [Toronto Star]...

Packer Backers No Longer Taking This So Well
Maybe Dash gave you the impression that all Packer fans are being their typical polite Midwestern selves with this whole Favre business. He failed to go where even the most reserved Wisconsinite transforms into a slobbering, bloodthirsty, illiterate neanderthal: Craigslist....