on Page 6056 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

In Praise Of The Baseball All-Star Game
This is a weekly column from Leitch....

David Ortiz Is Still Worth More Than General Motors
David Ortiz's putrid 2009 numbers — .185, 1 HR, 18 RBI, 48 strikeouts — don't qualify for a government bailout, as his statistics translate to an approximate worth on the free agent market of negative $5.2 million. At least he's more valuable than Delmon Young. [Fangraphs, via Simon on Sports]...

Twitter Posts Aren't Real Journalism, Silly!
Like many newspaper reporters, Tampa Bay beat writer Rick Stroud uses Twitter to connect with his readers and talk about whatever happens to be on his mind—but if you're stupid enough to take his Twits at face value then that's your own stupid fault....

Not Even Tasers Can Stop The Gators
Florida's starting cornerback Janoris Jenkins had a brainstorm this weekend, powered by a few thousand watts of taser juice courtesy of the local police. As if that could ever slow down a Gator superstar....

Barry Bonds Was Doing This For The Kids
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Add Trannies To The List Of People Faintly Annoyed By Danica Patrick
The new Danica Patrick commercial: clever deconstruction of gender identity or grievous insult to the transgender community? Discuss. [Trans Universe, via All Left Turns]...

FIGJAM Returns, Some People Depart
This is actually good news for those who like golf and story lines ready-made for sports columnists aching to showcase their Nicholas Sparks technique: Phil Mickelson will return to the PGA Tour, including the U.S. Open....

How LeBron Could Have Avoided Handshakegate Without Shaking Hands
Sports columnists must love LeBron James. Not only does he provide fanciful fodder during the regular season and permit them to wax rhapsodic as witnesses during the playoffs, but even when his season is done, he gives them the material they need for their next-day opinions....

Tom Brady Even Heals Better Than A Normal Person
Brady's surgeon on the quarterback's rehab: "With regard to his recovery of strength, I've never seen anything quite like it. With an average person, it would have taken probably twice as long to get range of motion and strength back." Sweet jeebus, who is this guy? Wolverine? [LA Times]...

It's So Hard To Say Goodbye To Gatorade
The fancy schmancy Gatorade dispenser that has adorned the home dugout at Wrigley Field this summer is being removed and replaced with a boring old water cooler. Why? Because people can't be trusted to have nice things....

Sir Charles Continues To Be The Most Bulletproof Person In Media
After his audible "pussy" blurt during Saturday night's Inside The NBA broadcast , Charles Barkley was reportedly given a stern talking-to by the suits at the TNT. Of course, that's all he received....

One Man's Fight For A Home Run Ball...In Pictures
We'll call Meech the "Unhappy Youngster" from now on. The photos are pretty incredible, though. [The Fightins]...

Another Prerequisite For Referees: Superhuman Vision
The NCAA is expected to enact a policy Wednesday to cut down on flopping by help-side defenders sliding under the basket. Here's the catch: The semi-circle to enforce the rule won't actually be painted, only imaginary, like the chances of this new rule ever working....

Pretty Girls Make Easy Targets
A good portion of Americans join softball leagues this time of the year. Many do it for the social aspect alone, which leaves many teams stockpiled with players who are ridiculously awful....

What Is Wrong With Our Fragile Baseball Players?
Khalil Greene has been placed on the disabled list with an unspecified "social anxiety disorder" making him at least the third major leaguer to miss significant time with a similar complaint. That, my friends, is a TREND ALERT! So what the heck is going on here?...

Redick And Morrison, Reunited And It Feels So Good
"Remember when they cried in college? Remember when they played Halo against each other? They were like Magic and Bird in college, except that they weren't in any way." Redick scored seven points in the conference finals. Morrison hasn't played since April 14. Guess that settles SI's cover question!...

The WNBA, Becoming More Like Little League Every Day
In a move to Europeanize America, the Phoenix Mercury will no longer have the team or city name on their jerseys after striking a deal with LifeLock, an identity theft protection firm. Hey, that's ironic! The WNBA President calls it "innovation." More like "doing anything to not go under." [NYT]...

ESPN Engages In A Bit Of Time Travel
A tipster sent us this shot of the Chicago skyline from last night's Dodgers-Cubs broadcast on ESPN. Pretty, isn't it? Pretty much a lie, that is. The city hasn't looked like this since 2004, when the Sun-Times building you see at left gave way to Trump's unsightly monument to himself....

Your Profanity-Laced Tirades Will Now Be Taken Under Advisement
So: For those of you concerned, upset, distraught, FURIOUS, over the new commenting policy there's an email box for you to send those fiery missives:[email protected]...
