one Page 301 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Andruw Jones May Be A Bit Confused
Andruw Jones turns down a minor-league deal with the Yankees, then signs a minor-league deal with the Rangers. Someone please explain to him how "negotiating" works.... [Lewp]...

The End Of The Shaq Era In Phoenix Draws Nigh
One year ago yesterday, the Phoenix Suns traded for Shaquille O'Neal. Today, Marc Stein of ESPN.com is reporting that the Suns are possibly looking to trade Shaq and one-time future cornerstone Amare Stoudemire....

Andy Rooney's Experience At Super Bowl XLIII
Apparently there was one person who wasn't that impressed with all the excitement of Super Bowl XLIII and it had nothing to do with the outcome. It's "60 Minutes" professional curmudgeon, Andy Rooney....

Santonio Holmes Toes Have Also Touched A Nerve
A full-scale battle of the screen-grabs has been waged between Mattoonian Buzzsaw Emeritus and seemingly every Pittsburgh Steelers fan with access to a computer. Even the Politico readers are pissed....

The Curious Case Of Billy Beane
Soderbergh has almost committed, but Pitt's on board to star in film adaptation of "Moneyball". Scott Hatteberg was originally supposed to be played by Joaquin Phoenix. Dude went crazy, though. [Variety]...

My Name Is Inigio Montoya (Cough), You Killed My Father, Prepare To ZZzzzzz
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]...

Tyra Banks Drops Jonesboro High Dance Team Like They're Hot
You remember the Jonesboro High Dance Team, those wacky teenagers from Georgia whose provocative halftime routine got them banned by the school district? Now they've been canceled by Tyra Banks....

He Fought The Tow Truck And The Tow Truck Won
No sooner had Ohio State garnered some positive publicity than the Buckeyes were brought back to earth with the drunken, mischievous adventures of offensive lineman Alex Boone....

Very Naughty Jonesboro High Dance Team Banned Until Further Notice
After their YouTube video, entitled "The Sluts Of Jonesboro," went viral, the Jonesboro High dance team has been disbanded by the school district. Here's what all the hullaballoo is about....

Marquette Enjoying The Top While It Can
The Golden Eagles dispatched the suddenly terrible Fighting Irish leaving them on top of the Big East for at least a little while longer....

Their Youth Sustains Him
How does Jerry Jones unwind after a stressful season? By hanging out with the young people at John Legend's after party, of course. The unbuttoned shirt just screams youthful and hip....

Exclusive: Stanford Tree Responds To Cheerleader Booty-Licking Allegations
Here is the Stanford Tree's email response to our post from yesterday, which included a shocking photo of the mascot involved in some apparent menage-a-tree with buxom college cheerleaders....

Horny, Inebriated Stanford Tree A Menace To Decent Society
Drunk, disruptive and often pantsless; never has there been a more disorderly college mascot than the Stanford Tree. So where's his reality show?...

News Flash: Good Football Won't Save The Economy
Wall Street Journal writer is accosted by a panhandler in Baltimore, proving that Barack Obama's stimulus package will not win the Super Bowl. [WSJ]...

Kobe Is The MVP, The Horse Has Spoken
Well, there's not point in having an MVP vote this year—or even playing the rest of the NBA season—for that matter. Shaq's Twitter feed has made its choice and that's good enough for me....

The Downside Of Doing Your Teacher
We've covered many, many instances of teacher/student-athlete fornication. The latest issue of Rolling Stone reveals that even though it seems like every teenage boy's fantasy, it can really fuck a kid up....

Sam Bradford Just Can't Quit You
Oklahoma's sophomore quarterback has just announced that he's forgoing the NFL draft to stay at Oklahoma. It's on again, Tebow! [NBCSports]...

Finish Your Anabolic Steroids Or There Will Be No Cartoons
Simply being hearty and cornfed is no longer enough of an edge for young Iowa athletes. Some dads feel that they've got to add a little something extra to their sons' morning Count Chocula....

Texas And Oklahoma To Settle Their Differences Through Sport
Yes, the Longhorns and Sooners can argue for eternity about who won the Big 12 South this fall, or they can use the entirely different athletic pursuit of basketball to sort it all out....

Trying To Make Sense Of That Adam Jones "Outside The Lines" Report
I'm still trying to wrap my head around the "Outside The Lines" report about Adam Jones, but you know who could help us make sense of all this? Stephen A. Smith!...