out Page 196 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
PGA Braces For A Year Of Living Tigerlessly
The PGA tour is now officially in trouble. Tiger Woods, athlete of the century, god amongst golfers and multi-blade razor pitchman, will have knee surgery to repair a torn ACL that will keep him out the rest of the 2008 season. Tiger, taking a break from having acrobatic intimate relations with his ...
ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its boldest, cleverest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
About Last Night
What you missed while loading the photon torpedoes of love ... • NBA: Celtics beat Lakers 103-83 131-92 to take series, move on to face ... wait, it's over? The NBA season is over? Oh blessed summertime, I can embrace you now! Fresh air, flowers, glorious sun! WE ARE FREE! • College baseball: Smack ...
Drew Brees Will Take You Deep
Just to prove how random God's sense of humor really is, Ken Oberkfell's last official act as manager of the New Orleans Zephyrs on Monday was to throw batting practice to Saints' quarterbacks Drew Brees and Mark Brunell. Oberkfell, who has managed the Class AAA Pacific Coast League team for five se...
Hank Steinbrenner Is Just Boiling Over With Ideas
Pity the poor New York media. (A group in which, it occurs to us with a start, we are about to be considered a member.) They're so wistful for the old days of George Steinbrenner that they're desperately trying to shoehorn son Hank, the slow one, into the role. It's not working....
About Last Night
What you missed while watching hot lesbian action ... • MLB: Tigers just can't catch a break in this town. San Francisco 8, Detroit 6. • Soccer: Germany conquers Austria, annexes the Sudetenland. • NBA: Ray Allen will be at the dance, girls. He WILL be there....
About Last Night
The joke is on the leopard ... he got off at the wrong stop ... • It was awfully nice of the Lakers to allow the Celtics to win the NBA title at home. (NOTE: Should LA come back and win this, this post never happened. Got it?). • MLB: Yankees beat Astros 13-0, and you can make your own damned Wang j...
About Last Night...
What you missed while shopping for the ten best fictional dads for Fathers Day... • U.S. Open: Tiger Uppercut! The one-and-a-half-kneed wonder leads Lee Westwood by one shot. But will we see the Hundred Hand Slap prevail in the final round? • NCAA Baseball: Stanford scores 11 runs in the 9th to beat...
About Last Night
What you missed while attending the retirement party for your commenter screenname, the one with the dangly hyphens... • U.S. Open: Tiger Woods would be in first, if it weren't for that meddling Stuart Appleby. • MLB: Yankees beat 'Stros 2-1, and Joba Chamberlain is up to six — 6! — innings. Ah ah a...
Mike Tyson's Rub Out
Mike Tyson is one of those rare breeds who, whatever kind of trouble they get into or bizarre allegation they have thrown at them, it's never surprising. (Ed. Note: Doesn't Simmons have a theory about this?) The latest one proves it; any other famous person on the planet accused of financing a hit...
About Last Night
What you missed while being reminded once again that you don't mess with the Zohan ... • NBA: That's what you get for turning off the game in the third quarter. Celtics take 3-1 series lead over Lakers. • Golf: You can all just eat Kevin Streelman's U.S. Open dust, suckers! • NHL: All your Lester B....
About Last Night
All those who guessed that the cubicle rampage video was a fake, please come collect your winnings ... • MLB: All hail the walkoff grand slam. Everybody say Uggla! Marlins 6, Phillies 2. • Soccer: Wait, they have Cristiano Ronaldo, and Pepe? How can Portugal ever lose? • NFL: I Am Legend ... Will Sm...
About Last Night
What you missed while preparing to flee into outer space ... • NBA: March toward inevitable Game 7 continues ... Lakers 87, Celtics 81. • MLB: I sense a great disturbance in The Force ... Noooo! • NHL: Ron Wilson, fired by Sharks, finds employment in Canada....
About Last Night
What you missed while noticing that the head of the World Health Organization's department of HIV/AIDS has an unfortunate name ... • Ruud van Nistelrooy sends Italians to brink of World Cup qualifying doom. • NFL: In non-Ruud van Nistelrooy news, the Bears cut Cedric Benson. • Agent Zero opts out of...
About Last Night
What you missed after turning off the game with the Celtics up by 24 ... • NBA: Could this be the most unsafe 2-0 lead in finals history? Celtics 108, Lakers 102. • Tennis: Claymation ... Nadal beats Federer to win French Open. Don't drop the trophy! • MLB: Go Fish ... Hanley Ramirez homers twice as...
Somebody Has Been Watching "Rookie Of The Year"
Yesterday during the NCAA Super Regional, UC Irvine got out of a base loaded jam in the 7th inning against LSU by pulling the Hidden Ball Trick, which is best known to people of my generation from the movie Rookie of the Year, which also taught us that pitchers got big butts. Except UC Irvine didn't...
Jesus Sportsblogging Christ, I Hate This Ad
Forgive the momentary diversion, but I've taken as much as I can from this G2 ad and I can't takes no more. Seriously, what the fuck is the deal with this thing? The Sporting Blog had a fine piece the other week decrying the various grating NBA Playoff commercials that are quickly driving us to self...
About Last Night...
What you missed while amassing your army of humanzees in anticipation of the Deadspin power vacuum......
About Last Night
What you missed while using your binoculars to watch a bearded tit ... • NBA: Wheelchair basketball ... Pierce shakes off knee injury, leads Celtics over Lakers in Game 1. • MLB: Cole Hamels > Ken Griffey Jr. Phillies 5, Reds 0. • MLB: Please don't televise the draft again. Thanks....
About Last Night
What you missed while trashing your workplace because they took your red stapler ... • NHL: Heart like a wheel ... Wings win Stanley Cup! For Christ's sake, don't drop it! • MLB: Paul Konerko ends our suffering, White Sox beat Royals in 15. • NBA: Suns down to four coaching candidates. Hey, where's ...