ow Page 1078 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
College Football Previews: #5 Florida
We've entered college football season. Hark, it lurks but three days hence. And, perhaps even more importantly, we've entered the top 5 of college football. Today's Florida previews is brought to you by Orson Swindle/Spencer Hall, a man who can slit your team's throat so skillfully you're still lau...
Redeem Team Gets Their Gold And Beijing Says Goodbye With Beckham And A Lot Of Pyrotechnics
Each weekday morning Awful Announcing, video slash and grab extraordinaire of the sports blogosphere, gives us a visual rundown of everything you missed from the night before. If there's something sports-related you'd like to see with your coffee, shoot him an e-mail and let him know....
To Watch Tonight: Last Excuse to Sleep on the Couch
What to watch while enjoying the first shout-out to Usain Bolt in the music of the kids today (now with audio) ... • Olympics: Volleyball, Closing Ceremonies. If you miss it, just buy the DVD next week. [NBC] • MLB Baseball: Dodgers at Phillies. We're not saying Jamie Moyer and Greg Maddux are old,...
To Watch Tonight: The Winner Takes It All
What to watch to overcome your disappointment in the Golf Digest submission standards... • NFL Preseason Football: Steelers vs. Vikings (8 pm ET) - The Vikings' mastery of steel is well-documented. The Steelers' mastery of vike, on the other hand, has less supporting evidence. [CBS] • NASCAR: Sharpi...
Synchronized Swimmer Sinks Slowly; Silly Swimmer!
We've been shopping our script about a narcoleptic synchronized swimmer for years to no avail; it's an uplifting story, but you know how much it costs to make a water-based film. However, we've dusted off the script and sent it to our agent again after hearing that one of the Japanese synchronized s...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch in your $5,000 tree house ... • Boxing: Fernando Beltran vs. Takalani Ndlovu, for vacant IBF featherweight title, at Nashville (9 p.m., ET). Takalani Ndlovu to you, too. [ESPN2] • NFL preseason: Houston at Dallas (8 p.m., ET). Yet another game Hank Hill will miss due to Bobby's bell ch...
Tell Me How My Sass Tastes: Woman Gets Restraining Order Against Shaq For "Stalking"
Just as things started looking up for Shaquille O'Neal (a rejuvenation of his NBA career in Phoenix, a rejuvenation of his rap career, making up with his estranged wife) he might be in store for some troubling times due to the allegations of one Atlanta-based lady who claims The Diesel is "stalking ...
LLWS The Remix, The Return Of The Neckbearded One And More Beach Volleyball Gold
Each weekday morning Awful Announcing, video slash and grab extraordinaire of the sports blogosphere, gives us a visual rundown of everything you missed from the night before. If there's something sports-related you'd like to see with your coffee, shoot him an e-mail and let him know....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you move your boogie body ... shake it sugar do it to it! ... • Little League Baseball: World Series in South Williamsport, Pa., USA semifinal, Tampa vs. Lake Charles, La., (8 p.m., ET). These kids just happy to be away from the hurricanes and floods. [ESPN] • NFL: Preseason, San Fr...
Deadspin HOF Nominee: Buzz Bissinger
Frankly, I'm not sure what more more I can say about good ole Buzz. I think we covered everything here and here and here and, at last, here. I mean, what more is there? I suppose I can just leave you with videos, if you were somehow just beamed here. The original: And, of course, the brilliant rem...
Lawsuit Alleges Priest Molested Boy at 2005 White Sox Game
The lawsuit was filed against the Chicago Archdiocese yesterday. The alleged molester, priest Daniel McCormick, has already been the subject of a lawsuit settled on behalf of the archdiocese last week. In that case 11 priests were sued by 16 children. The alleged molestation occured in August of 20...
Peter King Shovels Popcorn, Erin Andrews Holds A Fish Head And Beach Volleyball Gold For The U.S.
Each weekday morning Awful Announcing, video slash and grab extraordinaire of the sports blogosphere, gives us a visual rundown of everything you missed from the night before. If there's something sports-related you'd like to see with your coffee, shoot him an e-mail and let him know....
College Football Previews: #10 Texas
At long last, we enter the top 10. Your author is Peter Bean of Burnt Orange Nation. He's also the author of The Eyes of Texas 2008. You'll be happy to know that the above picture of Jenna Bush rocking the longhorn sign sent Muslim hearts spinning because they believed it was a sign of Satan. Oklah...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you realize your father is quite probably insane ... • Little League Baseball: World Series at South Williamsport, Pa., U.S. semifinal, Waipahu, Hawaii, vs. Mill Creek, Washington (8 p.m., ET). Giant 12-year-olds terrorize the 200-foot fences. [ESPN] • MLB: Los Angeles Angels at Tam...
College Football Previews: #11 Auburn
We're rolling through the top 25 and later this afternoon we'll finally crack into the top ten. Until then enjoy the melodic stylings of 2003 Auburn grad Brian J. Stultz as he brings down the hammer on the Tide, raises the profile of apostrophized greatness that is Sen'Derrick Marks, and defends To...
Reds Management Would Like To Apologize For All The Sucking
In an odd move even for them, the Cincinnati Reds front office has written an open letter to fans to apologize for being in last place. Of course, CEO Bob Castellini and GM Walt Jocketty don't admit to any wrongdoing — there were injuries! And the weather has been generally bad! — but they don't wan...
BJ Upton Hustles But Somehow Starts A New Controversy, Kite Fighting And Don't Fall Asleep At The LLWS
Each weekday morning Awful Announcing, video slash and grab extraordinaire of the sports blogosphere, gives us a visual rundown of everything you missed from the night before. If there's something sports-related you'd like to see with your coffee, shoot him an e-mail and let him know....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after a day at the Boobs on Bikes Parade ... • Little League Baseball: Pool play, in South Williamsport, Pa., Curacao vs. Guam (6 p.m., ET); Lake Charles, La., vs. Hagerstown, Md. (8 p.m., ET) [ESPN2] • Olympics: Boxing (5 p.m. to 8 p.m., ET) [CNBC]; gymnastics, synchronized swimming, ...
New White Sox Danger: Shaving Cream Pies to the Face
And you thought Ozzie Guillen was all the White Sox had to fear in the locker room. Backup catcher Toby Hall is recovering after Jermaine Dye blocked his attempted pie to the face. Does anyone ever wonder where all these pies come from in baseball locker rooms? How many times have you had extra pie...
NFL Season Preview: Dallas Cowboys
We're less than a month away from the start of the NFL season, so it's time to start the impassioned season previews from various writers, bloggers, diehard fans, cooks, TV personalities, and numerous other walks of life whom consider football the only sport worth watching. This year, the previews w...