ow Page 1098 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you put the finishing touches on your beer can coffin ... • Arena Football: Chicago at Tampa Bay (8 p.m., ET). Storm's a-brewin'. [ESPN2] • MLB: Boston at Detroit (7 p.m., ET). This matchup looked pretty bland two weeks ago. Now, I'm looking forward to it. [ESPN] • NBA: Eastern Conf...
Ozzie Guillen Does A Brilliant Ozzie Guillen Impersonation
Perhaps it's appropriate that Ozzie Guillen would unleash one of his patented expletive-filled tirades on Chicago fans, the Cubs, and media outlets just a few short days removed from the 25th anniversary of Lee Elia's epic f-bomb ranting. Maybe it was an homage. But more likely it was just Ozzie Gui...
Who's Sorry Now? Rocket Edition
Nowhere in the recorded history of regret has there been a more hang-dog expression than this. Hasn't Roger Clemens suffered enough? Just look at him. The round head that reminds you of the boulder that chased Indiana Jones. The pale skin that reminds you of the moon. The furrowed brow where he keep...
The Buzz Bissinger Affair, In Song (And I Feel Fine)
It's The End Of Sports News As We Know It [YouTube]...
On Race, Message Boards And Shutting The Hell Up
Of all the panels on "Costas Now" the other night, the one we thought was most effective at tickling the cerebral cortex was the last one, about race, featuring Cris Carter, Michael Wilbon and Jason Whitlock. (It was so absorbing that "Costas Now" is doing a full 90-minute segment just on race down ...
Tim Tebow Has A Steady Hand, We Hope
Florida quarterback Tim Tebow is an amazing, versatile quarterback, able to chuck a pass 50 yards, turn the corner and a linebacker and plow over undersized defensive lineman. He's a Renaissance Man, a do-gooder, a man of America. His skills run deep. How deep? Trust us, you don't want to know....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while doing a little post-Derby laundry... • Sunday Night Baseball: St. Louis Cardinals vs. Chicago Cubs. Finally, an end to the early May logjam atop the NL Central! [ESPN] • Drag Racing: NHRA Midwest Nationals, Final Eliminations from Madison, IL. This midwestern bias is getting out...
Newcastle Owner Now Slightly Richer
Newcastle have been on quite a run as of late, and Mike Ashley is taking full advantage. The club's billionaire owner recently strolled into his local casino (note to self: move to England) and had a seat at the roulette wheel, the greatest table game of them all. Ashley decided to make the boldest ...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while wondering if the new statue at Staples Center will sport fishnets... • Oscar de la Hoya vs. Steve Forbes. Check back in later tonight. [HBO] • The Detroit Pistons host the Orlando Magic in the first game of the NBA Playoff's second round. The first round should be wrapping up any...
They're Ready to Run For the Roses
The little people are mounting their steeds, which means the most exciting two minutes in sports (setting aside the final two minutes in almost all other highly contested sporting events) can't be far behind. Oh wait, they're playing "My Old(e?) Kentucky Home. This could take a while. Hey, an ex-boy...
Inside the Infield at Churchill Downs
Just because you don't really give a crap about horse racing doesn't mean you shouldn't be enjoying yourself like the happy-go-lucky types at the OTB. The Kentucky Derby is really just one huge ass party divided in two parts. The rich guys and southern belles cougars wear their most ridiculously ex...
For Your Afternoon Viewing Pleasure
• Her. • 3:00 — Golf: Wachovia Championship, Third Round. No Tiger, but a talented leaderboard nonetheless. [CBS] • 3:00 — Horses: Kentucky Derby. Post time is 6:00 pm. [NBC] • 3:00 — Horses: Live at the Derby. Every time I turn it on the dog starts barking. It's either the horses or Kenny Mayne's e...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while faithfully observing No Pants Day ... • MLB: Chicago Cubs at St. Louis Cardinals (8:05 p.m., ET). Rich Hill (6-foot-5) vs. Adam Wainwright (6-7). That's 13 feet of entertainment right there! [WGN] • NBA playoffs: Eastern Conference first round, Game 6, Boston Celtics at Atlanta H...
And It's C-m Rocket In The Lead!
This weekend, those of you who are equine-obsessed or have an affinity for minty rum drinks and giant pink hats, will most likely have a rooting interest in the most exhilarating two minutes in sports, the Kentucky Derby. Right now, the favorite horse is a strapping young colt named "Big Brown", a n...
Step Right Up To Get Your Own Bowl Game
A brilliant discovery by Every Day Should Be Saturday has our minds a-racin'. It turns out that St. Petersberg is getting a bowl game but doesn't have a sponsor yet. Hmm....
Take A Tour Of Pacman's Crib
Now that he's headed for the bright, shining silver star of Dallas, Adam "Pacman" Jones no longer needs his digs in Tennesse. For just $1.8 million, you can move into 4282 N Chapel Rd in Franklin, and call this spacious, stripper-friendly abode your own....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while enjoying the velvety, rich bouquet of chocolate wine ... • College men's volleyball: NCAA Division I tournament, semifinals, at Irvine, Calif.; Ohio State vs. Penn State (9 p.m., ET); Long Beach State vs. Pepperdine (11:30 p.m., ET). The sport Greg Oden should have played. [ESPN2...
Like Zombies And Hillary Clinton, Brett Favre Will Not Go Away
It would almost be worth going through a whole new cycle of Brett-Favre-is-unretiring stories to see him in a Chicago Bears uniform in 2009. I said almost. According to Leroy Butler as reported by MSNBC, Favre wants to play this coming season, but not with the Packers. But then, with whom?...
Place Bets On The Next NBA Stoner
This has certainly been covered elsewhere — most excellently by TrueHoop - but we really can't get over the "Josh Howard is a terrible person for smoking weed" meme. As Henry Abbott put it, "We're not alarmed that one young person smoked pot. We're alarmed that anyone admitted it." Fitting, not even...
Closing Out This Bissinger Business
We really don't want to get into this too much more today, because yesterday was exhausting enough (and we weren't even working!). But we will say this: We were, bizarrely, on "The Best Damn Sports Show Period" yesterday, and not only was the level of discourse pitched higher than on "Costas Now," b...