ow Page 1119 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Monday Night Football Makes The Bills Want To Shout
As everybody keeps telling us on the TV set, it has been 13 years since the Bills were on "Monday Night Football," which is amazing, considering even the Buzzsaw has been on three times since then. (And lost all three, of course.) This is the opportunity for all of you with Trent Edwards fever to sc...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after trying, and failing, to beat our personal best of 4.00 ... • MLB: American League Division Series; Cleveland at New York Yankees, Game 4. Would someone tell the TBS site that they're showing the playoffs, and that the Braves aren't involved? [TBS] • NFL: Dallas at Buffalo. Ghost ...

The Los Angeles Angels of Sucktown
Well I was going to wait for this baseball game to end to call it a weekend, but I think it's safe to say that it's over. The Boston Red Sox have exploded with seven runs in the eighth inning to take a 9-0 lead. The only runs that really mattered were the back-to-back solo shots from Big Papi and C...

The First Few Rows May Get Bloody
This time it's Pac Man who's coming into the ring as a big favorite and he's carrying some additional baggage. Pacquiao began training with Freddie Roach a month late and in a different country than everyone expected. However the biggest questions being raised do not concern his conditioning. Instea...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you make your child's Halloween costume ... • MLB: American League Division Series, Game 2, New York Yankees at Cleveland; ALDS, Game 2, Los Angeles Angels at Boston. Get ready for a flood of kids named Asdrubal. [TBS] • College football: Utah at Louisville. Mmmmm, Papa John's Cardi...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after putting up your National Porn Sunday decorations ... • College football: Kentucky at South Carolina. Kentucky has the talent to win this game. This is Kige Ramsey for YouTube Sports. [ESPN] • MLB: Divisional playoffs, New York Yankees at Cleveland, Game 1; Chicago Cubs at Arizona...


In Which Bonds And His Ex-Mistress Are Both Fully Exposed
As you may have heard by now, it seems that the November issue of Playboy has just about something for everyone. Six-page nude pictorial on ex-Barry Bonds mistress Kimberly Bell? Check. Bell's revelations about Bonds' steroid use, including eyewitness testimony concerning his shrunken testicles? Che...

It's Almost As If Owners Are Just Trying To Steal Money
It's easy to forget, when we're all caught up in the fun of the postseason and what-not, that every moment we find ourselves excited about it is designed primarily — almost solely — on putting more money in owners' pockets. You'd think they wouldn't have to fudge the rules to make more money. But th...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after bargaining for more playing time for your son ... • College football: Rice at Southern Mississippi. My Jeff Bower bobblehead is pretty much the most invincible of all of my bobblehead collection. [ESPN2] • MLB: American League Division Series, Game 1, Los Angeles at Boston; Natio...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after tucking in your pumpkin ... • College football: Marshall at Memphis. Yes, sad, but let's not overdo it, ESPN. [ESPN2] • Soccer: UEFA Champions League, Barcelona at VFB Stuttgart (same-day tape). Hopefully no one at work today will blurt out the score. [ESPN Classic] • Extreme Cag...

About Last Night
What you missed after accidentally swallowing your Bluetooth ... • MLB: It's the Holliday season ... If one of the Padres can find out where Matt Holliday lives, he can still drive over there with a ball and tag him. Then it's welcome to the 14th inning, folks! Colorado 9, San Diego 8, 13 innings. •...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while, on PBS, Eisenhower finally decides to invade Normandy ... • NFL: New England at Cincinnati. Your fantasy team has 3 total points, because most of your roster plays tonight. [ESPN] • Rugby: World Cup, South Africa vs. U.S. What happens in the scrum, stays in the scrum. [Versus] •...

Your Full Klingons-Furries Bowling Report
You might remember last week, when we told you about the glories of the Furries Vs. Klingons bowling match in Atlanta. Well, someone showed up and took a bunch of pictures. Heck, admission was only 10 bucks....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while working out the kinks on your pumpkin trebuchet... • 8 p.m. — Documentary: The Enduring Spirit of Roberto Clemente. Yeah, whatever happened to that guy? [ESPN] • 8:15 p.m. — NFL: Philadelphia Eagles at New York Giants. Can't imagine who Tiki Barber will be pulling for. [NBC] • 10...


You'd Think LeBron Would Be Accustomed To Being Surrounded By Nobodies
Like many of you since 1996, I missed Saturday Night Live last night, hosted by LeBron James, and have only the YouTubery offered up by NBC to go on. In this case, the monologue ("LeBronologue!" Oh, what whimsy!) was my favorite. There was also a High School Musical skit that had so much potential, ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while sitting on your Concorde jet toilet seat... • 8 p.m. — NCAA Football: Auburn at Florida [ESPN], Ohio State at Minnesota [ESPN2]. It's not October yet, and OSU is already playing it's second road game. Man, what a schedule. • 8 p.m. — Movie: The Office. I'm trying to think of a qu...