ow Page 389 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Lionel Messi Pulls Off One Of The Worst Misses Of His Career, Presumably To Prove He's Human
One downside to being the greatest player to ever kick a soccer ball has to be that people eventually take your greatness for granted. It’s all well and good to be referred to as a god or an alien, but conjure so many miracles over a long enough timespan, and the effect of your otherworldliness sta...

Overeager Victor Robles Eats Shit On Badly Mistimed Diving Catch Attempt
The Astros are tough as hell. They jumped out to a 2–0 lead in the bottom of the first against Nationals Game 1 starter Max Scherzer, and have made Scherzer work out of trouble in every inning so far. In the bottom of the third, with the Astros up a run, Yuli Gurriel flared a blooper to shallow left...

Keeper Earns Record For The Fastest, And Probably The Dumbest, Red Card In League History
Look at Konyaspor goalkeeper Serkan Kırıntılı here, just casually catching a ball while needlessly outside of his box a mere 13 seconds into Monday’s match against Yeni Malatyaspor, and in so doing setting a new Süper Lig record for the fastest red card ever. It’s hard to imagine a stupider way to g...

Odell Beckham Jr. Is Pissed About A Big Fine For A Dumb Uniform Violation
Browns receiver Odell Beckham Jr. showed off his gams during Cleveland’s Week 6 loss to the Seattle Seahawks back in Week 6, wearing his uniform pants a couple inches above the knee. Why should you give a rip whether a football man wears his pants above or below the knee, you ask, like a real grump?...

Mike Leach, Convinced Of His Own Cleverness, Tells Unbearably Long Joke About Lip Reading
Asked Monday evening whether he’s nervous for next week’s matchup against No. 11 Oregon, where four of his former assistants now work, Mike Leach used the opportunity to take a swipe at football coaches so paranoid about their plays being found out that they cover their mouths while talking on the s...

FA Cup Match To Be Replayed After Team Walked Off The Field Due To Racist Abuse
It’s been a banner fortnight for racism in English soccer. After the debacle in Sofia, wherein the England national team was racially abused by Bulgarian fans, the racism came home in an FA Cup match this weekend....

The Cowboys Bulldozed The Eagles Off The Field And Now Doug Pederson Has Some Explaining To Do
After a build-up in which head coach Doug Pederson was so confident in his team that he spoke of beating the Cowboys as a when, not if, scenario, the Eagles flew into Dallas and suffered the most humiliating loss of Pederson’s tenure. With the whole country watching them against a division rival, Ph...

Chargers Lose In Humiliating Fashion After Melting Down On The Goal Line
The Los Angeles Chargers looked all set to capture a dramatic win in Tennessee this afternoon, only to lose on one of the most bizarre, painful sequences you’ll see all year. The franchise has mastered losing in idiotic ways, and the final sequence of today’s 23-20 was the apotheosis of that trend....

Heat Suspend Dion Waiters For Having A Tantrum On The Bench During Preseason
As the NBA preseason comes to a close and teams work to finalize what their regular season rosters will look like, it would appear that one player has decided to make their team’s rotation choices a little bit easier: Dion Waiters. The man who’s famous for scoring a game-winning buzzer-beater agains...

Will Muschamp Went Ballistic On "Gutless" Officials After Crucial Missed Penalty
South Carolina dropped a tough one against Florida yesterday, giving up three touchdowns to the Gators in the fourth quarter to lose 38-27. Their bid for a second straight top-ten upset unraveled in frustrating fashion, as officials seemed to miss clear penalties on two of the biggest plays of the g...

Joe Burrow Showed His Ass And Broke A School Record
On a first-and-10 from his team’s 23-yard line, Joe Burrow, LSU quarterback and the current Heisman favorite, broke conventional football wisdom and took what might be the wisest sack of his career. Under normal circumstances, if a defender that’s trying to bring a player down is only hanging on by...

Greg Hardy Had A UFC Win Overturned Because He Used An Inhaler Between Rounds
When we last checked in with Greg Hardy, he had just gotten the first loss of his MMA career after kneeing a downed opponent in the face. After that unceremonious defeat, he knocked out his next two hand-picked opponents in Dana White’s everlasting quest to make this guy likable. On Friday, Hardy on...

Sooner Schooner Accident Briefly Delays West Virginia-Oklahoma
Oklahoma had a little extra time to marinate in Jalen Hurts’s two-yard touchdown run that put the team up three scores on West Virginia. An accident from the Sooner Schooner, a covered wagon pulled by two white horses that serves as the school’s mascot, created a couple of big divots in the field th...

Video Shows Former Oregon Receiver Keanon Lowe Disarming, Hugging Suicidal Student
Former Oregon Ducks wide receiver Keanon Lowe was heralded as a hero back in May when it was reported that he brought down a would-be school shooter before anyone at a Portland high school could get hurt. Video of the incident has since been released because of a public records request from KOIN 6 i...

WWE Is Banking On Crossover Athletes To Carry Its Next Creepy Saudi Show
When WWE signed a deal with the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia last year, only the basics of the pact with the Gulf dictatorship were clear—biannual shows, in the kingdom, in exchange for a massive payday. Everything beyond that was difficult to imagine at the time, and became more and more difficult to ju...

Architect Of Baffling Broncos Fake Punt Also Responsible For Historically Bad Colts Trick Play
Reasonable people can debate the Broncos’ decision to run a fake punt early in the second quarter of Thursday’s poopshow loss to the Chiefs. The actual play itself, however, and/or the execution of said play, was something truly special....

These Michigan Student Section Shirts Were Free, But How Many Millions Are They Worth Now?
I’ll maintain that, given the amount of long-term punishment these shirts have all taken, they remain in perfectly acceptable shape. Every one of the Michigan student section shirts appraised for this episode of Antiques Shitshow has survived sweaty pregames, freezing-cold waits in line, and the ele...

Everyone Was Sick Of Joe Flacco's Bullshit
The Broncos’ Joe Flacco-led offense was an overflowing gas station toilet of ass in the team’s Thursday matchup against the Chiefs. Denver only just made it over 200 yards of total offense for the day thanks to a couple of garbage-time running plays, while Flacco threw for 213 yards, completing 21 o...

What's Wrong With The Baseballs Is What's Wrong With Baseball
Something is definitely up. There is data, and it points in a specific direction, but also there are some long shadows and heavy circumstances and longstanding and well-founded suspicions in play as well. But we might as well start with the data....

Here's A Humiliating Way To Lose Your First Game Of The Season
The Colorado Avalanche looked unstoppably good through their first five games of the NHL season, going 5-0-0 against their early competition. But too bad for them tonight, the Pittsburgh Penguins knew their weakness: Gabriel Landeskog can’t defend shorthanded overtime goals when he’s in the crease....