ow Page 611 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Dear Jon Stewart: Thanks For The Ride, Motherfucker
Good day to you, Jon Stewart. I never thought my first Dear Jon letter would explode with expletives, but ever since you, puckish fake newsman, hit what used to be called the small screen with your volcanic potty mouth and flagrant disregard for FCC regulations, you managed to disable just about eve...

Dopey <i>Sports Illustrated</i> Writer: Women's Sports Aren't Worth Watching
Andy Benoit covers the NFL for Sports Illustrated and regularly heads up pro football analysis for MMQB. He also has no time for your stupid Women’s World Cup, or women’s sports in general....

Wambach Blows PK After Colombian Keeper Sent Off; U.S. Score Anyway
Abby Wambach botched a penalty kick awarded after Colombian keeper Catalina Pérez earned a red card for bringing Alex Morgan down on the inside edge of the box, and a lackluster performance by the U.S. seemed to have its lacklustiest moment until a lucky break when Morgan snuck one past replacement ...

<i>Ballers</i> Shows Us How Boring (And Lethal) The NFL Really Is
That the season premiere of Ballers, HBO’s new semi-comedy about life in and around the NFL planetary system, turns out so predictably says something about how joyless those involved with professional football truly believe it to be. The show has the bones of a slogging 60-minute drama cut down to 3...

How To Kick Ass At Karaoke
Karaoke! It’s fun, it’s social, it’s a great way to show off your total mastery of the lyrics to “International Players’ Anthem.” But what if you’re the type of person who wants to sing, but doesn’t necessarily know where to start? It’s easier than you might think....

Orem Owlz PR Guy: I Had Nothing To Do With "Caucasian Heritage Night"
Former Orem Owlz media director Joey Zanaboni says he stepped down after only two weeks on the job due to the team’s refusal to reconsider “Caucasian Heritage Night”—only to see the team eventually relent after public scorn and mockery....

MLS, Everybody!
Have something you think we should know? Email us at [email protected], or contact our writers directly, or use our SecureDrop system. You can also follow us on Twitter and like us on Facebook....

Jordan Spieth Wins U.S. Open After Dustin Johnson Three-Putts 18
After a weekend of gripes about the state of Chambers Bay and the difficulty of the course, Jordan Spieth delivered a masterful second shot on the par-5 18th hole, one that played the wild geometry of the green like a putt-putt course and set the reigning Masters champion up for a two-putt birdie th...

Fox Is Still Struggling With Basic Facts About Golfers
It’s the final round of the U.S. Open, and viewers have had myriad and legitimate gripes about Fox in its first year as the tournament’s official broadcaster. One common theme has highlighted the network’s announcers and their lack of knowledge or preparation; here’s an example, in which former Brit...

WNBA Refs Award Made Basket For Shot That Clearly Did Not Enter Basket
In case you were wondering, there are people who actually wager on WNBA games. And some of those people were likely paying very close attention to the final minutes of last night’s Chicago Sky vs. Atlanta Dream game, because referees awarded Chicago’s Elena Delle Donne a basket that did not even com...

Utah Minor League Team Cancels Planned "Caucasian Heritage Night"
The Orem Owlz canceled a planned “Caucasian Heritage Night” after the Angels’ Rookie League affiliate found itself in the center of controversy over the ill-chosen promotion. The team’s media director also resigned as a result of the backlash. The team offered this attempt to explain the promotion:...

Whiskey Smackdown: Fireball Vs. Jack Daniel's Tennessee Fire
How do you know when you’ve really made it in life? It depends on who you are and what racket you’re in. For charming chumps like us, success could mean dental insurance, a bed that doesn’t fold in half, or an honorably discharged student loan. For those of loftier falutions, arrival in the big leag...

Mike Francesa Treats Listeners To U.S. Open Play-By-Play
Mike Francesa will probably never be able to recapture the brilliance that was 50 Seconds Of Phone Scrolling While Live On The Air, but he deserves credit for yesterday’s sequel, Nearly Three Minutes Of Halting U.S. Open Narration....

Things Are Not Going Well For Tiger Woods
The par-5 eighth at Chambers Bay turned ugly for Tiger Woods today, as his attempt to bounce back at the U.S. Open already finds the three-time champ four over par. He actually managed to par this, despite losing a handle on things....

Ken Shamrock Is The World's Most Dangerous Can
Six months ago, Ken Shamrock bought an RV. Two months ago, he parked it nine hours south of his family home in Reno, Nev., right by a mixed martial arts gym, where the 51-year-old is training for his heavyweight fight tomorrow night against Kimbo Slice....

Spain's Goalkeeper Mortified After Giving Up World Cup-Ending Goal
Yeah, that has to suck....

RIP To Matthew Dellavedova And His Terrible, Beautiful Lob Passes
For a minute there, it looked like Matthew Dellavedova, little try-hard that he is, was going to become a Finals hero for the Cleveland Cavaliers. That didn’t really work out, but that’s not to say that Delly didn’t provide us with a great deal of entertainment, because oh man did this guy do some h...

How To Steal Food From Craft Services
Today, I ate lunch on Netflix’s dime. It was okay. ...
