ow Page 692 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Zenit Player's Face Was A River Of Blood After Getting Kneed In Head
Unlike Antonio Valencia yesterday, Zenit's Tomas Hubocan was looking more Jake LaMotta than Rocky after Robert Lewandowski opened a vein with an unfortunately well-timed knee to the side of the head. Soccer is a blood sport....
How Not To Tease An Article About The Missing Malaysian Airplane
Noooo! Why would you do this, KETV? Combining a fake disaster with a real disaster was a terrible idea!...
Tony Romo Spawns Future Frontman Of Weezer Cover Band
Tony Romo and his wife Candice welcomed their second child into the world yesterday, and they gave the tyke an...uh...interesting name....
Your Last-Minute Bracket Cheat Sheet: What All The Smart People Say
The "first" "round" of the NCAA tournament is underway, and the deadline for bracket submissions is fast approaching. To help you out with your last-minute picks, we took a look a seven March Madness/college hoops models, and used them to build out seven different "expert brackets."...
Browns WR Josh Gordon Has A Gigantic, Elaborate Back Tattoo
Koi. A geisha. His jersey number. Josh Gordon's tremendous back tattoo has all that, and more!...
Denver News Station Accidentally Puts A Big Ol' Penis On The Air
See, this is why you don't just put the camera on some producer's Twitter feed while talking about a helicopter crash....
The NFL Now Wants $15.1 Million From M.I.A., Because The NFL Is Crazy
It was pretty goddamn ridiculous—for reasons explained here and here—when the NFL decided that it was going to sue M.I.A. for flipping the bird during her Super Bowl halftime performance, but according to new documents obtained by The Hollywood Reporter, the league's suit against M.I.A. has now gon...
"I GAVE YOU A THUMB'S UP!" Providence Live TV Report Goes Poorly
Here you have WJAR sports guy Frank Carpano trying to deliver a live report on the Big East championship game for Providence's NBC affiliate. Yeah, there are some technical difficulties, but it's Frank's enraged thumb's up that we're laughing hardest about....
San Diego Legend Ted Leitner Melts Down On-Air Over Suitcase Incident
Ted Leitner's best known as the voice of the San Diego Padres, but the longtime broadcaster also serves as the play-by-play man for San Diego State athletics. With just over a minute remaining in the Aztecs' thriller against New Mexico today at the Mountain West Conference title game in Las Vegas, a...
Failed Prediction Forces MSG Hockey Analyst To Eat A Hat On-Air
What we have here is MSG hockey guru and table hockey expert Stan Fischler attempting to make good on a promise that if the New York Rangers traded Ryan Callahan, he'd eat his hat. Callahan was traded to the Lightning in the blockbuster deal that sent Tampa Bay legend Martin St. Louis to New York, w...
How To Make Linguine With Clams And Bid Farewell To This Goddamn Winter
Groundhog meteorologists notwithstanding, seasons are shapeless, poorly defined things. To wit: Traditionally, in North America, the "winter" season is regarded as beginning at some point in the back half of December (the solstice) and extending into the back half of the following March (the equino...
Brent Musburger Still Lusting After College Girls
Brent Musburger recently earned a demotion to the SEC Network, which is a shame. The legendary broadcaster is always saying something provocative, even if, as he did last night, it's "Ohhh yeah." Sexism, sure. Heteronormative? Usually. Interesting; always....
Eyeblood Is The Call Of The Day
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....
Free Throw Attempt Features Flopping, Flagrant Foul
It's rare that a free throw attempt is delayed for five minutes, but it happened tonight in El Paso as the Conference USA semifinal between Southern Mississippi and Louisiana Tech forced officials to review footage of what was, essentially, a prank....
John Daly Shoots A 90, Continues To Give No Fucks
John Daly, professional golf's drunkest uncle, is 47 years old and still playing the game like someone who's there for the sunshine and the beer more than he is the actual golf. ...
Brandon Browner's Agent Handles Free Agency Reports At Rec Hockey Game
Defensive back Brandon Browner had signed with the Patriots tonight. Or, he hasn't. It depends on who you listen to. But the best part's that Peter Schaffer, Browner's agent, is dealing with the conflicting reports from his adult hockey league game in Denver....
The Ultimate Tribute To Brandon Weeden's Time With The Browns
The Cleveland Browns released Brandon Weeden yesterday, only two seasons after they shouldn't have drafted him. Someone put together the best of his stint with the Browns, and it's as poignant as a dead raccoon on the side of the highway....
New Browns Movie Poster Has Very Browns Typo
Give the Browns this: If you're going to OK your franchise's image to a true-to-life movie about a moribund franchise that needs a miracle draft (and just two years after spending two first round picks on Trent Richardson and Brandon Weeden!), one way to go about it is making sure the promotional ma...