ow Page 732 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Deez Nuts
This is fun. Thanks to Mark Drew for making 'em and Ego Trip for pointing 'em out....

Magic Johnson Is Leaving ESPN
ESPN announced today that Magic Johnson is leaving NBA Countdown and the network. Johnson, per ESPN, is leaving "due to his other commitments," which haven't been a problem in the past....

Book Claims Sheryl Crow Watched Lance Armstrong Dope, Told Feds
Now that Lance Armstrong has been humbled and faced a defamation lawsuit or three, it's pretty much open season on the disgraced cyclist. Every allegation with even the slightest credibility can be brought without fear of retribution, and they very well might be true—Armstrong's got more than a deca...

Ecstatic Cardinals Fan Tries To Kiss Pittsburgh Reporter Live On-Air
Poor Guy Junker. The WTAE reporter tried to deliver his somber live report from the site of Pittsburgh's season demise, and all Cardinals fans want to do is kiss him. ...

Why Clowney's Ribs Are An Existential Crisis For College Football
Each week during college football season we put the conventional polls to shame by ranking every FBS team from 1-125, by whatever standard we see fit. As always, last week's rankings were not consulted....

Jerry Sandusky's Son, Who's A Browns Executive, Charged With DUI
Jon Sandusky, the adopted son of former Penn State defensive coordinator and convicted serial pedophile Jerry Sandusky, was arrested on the suspicion of driving under the influence early Tuesday in Fargo, N.D....

Lowsman Trophy Watch: Another Notre Dame LB Steps Up
Each week, Football Outsiders recognizes the most outstanding college linemen, defenders and other darkhorses from the previous weekend who are habitually overlooked in the hype for that other award (whatever it's called). These are the Lowsmen....

The Year In Hawk Harrelson Being Awful
First, start playing this video put together by Awful Announcing, containing nearly 10 minutes of baseball's biggest homer being audibly sad and frustrated when things don't go the White Sox's way. Then leave it on in the background and go read the best thing you'll see all day....

D-Backs GM Kevin Towers Is Mad At His Team About The Dumbest Thing
The Arizona Diamondbacks did not have the best season, finishing with an 81-81 record, and that disappointment seems to have filled general manager Kevin Towers with impotent rage. But Towers isn't upset about his players not performing well enough to get his team into the playoffs. No, he's angry b...

NBA Cameraman Tries To Be Cool About His Foot Falling Asleep
Dude was working Saturday's Bulls-Pacers preseason game. He had to spring into action during a timeout, but his right foot needed a few more seconds to wake up. He tried to act all nonchalant by sticking his hand in his pocket, but it was already too late. Most of us aren't carrying a television cam...

Jadeveon Clowney Shouldn't Play Until He Gets Paid
South Carolina's all-world DE Jadeveon Clowney didn't play this weekend with a muscle strain, or maybe bruised ribs, and also some bone spurs in his foot. He's not been particularly clear on the ailment, or the state of his recovery, and the Gamecocks were surprised and confused that Clowney himself...

Another Raccoon Runs Wild In Stands During Bengals Game
Raccoons apparently cannot get enough of Paul Brown Stadium. For the second year in a row, here's a raccoon scurrying around the stands during a Bengals game. ...

The New Pro Bowl Uniforms Are Here
The Pro Bowl now has a whole bunch of new rules. It's a fantasy draft format instead of conference vs. conference. Kickoffs and kneeldowns are banned. The play clock will be shorter, but will run after incomplete passes. With today's release of the new uniforms, this Pro Bowl absolutely won't look a...

Jonathan Quick Scored A Power Play Goal On Himself
The last time we checked in on Jonathan Quick in these parts, he was saying "fuck" repeatedly. He probably did that again tonight, after a blunder handed the Rangers a third-period shorthanded goal that actually required zero hands....

Here's A Thrice-Tipped Game-Winning Circus Catch
To complete the day's trilogy of "crazy shit that happened in high school football over the weekend," we check in with Fairfield (Conn.) Ludlowe HS, and WR Mike Arman hauling in a ridiculous catch for what would be the game's go-ahead and last touchdown....

Sunset At JerryWorld
The Cowboys don't play a lot of late afternoon games. But when they do, AT&T Stadium is perfectly primed to capture the low rays of the sun in striking, often distracting ways....

There's No Crying At The Pee Wee Super Bowl
A new magazine story from Jeanne Marie Laskas is good reason to be excited. Her latest for GQ, "There's No Crying at the Pee Wee Super Bowl" looks like another sure shot:...

Report: Lions Center Was A Dick To The University Of Wisconsin Band
It appears that Dominic Raiola, the starting center for the Detroit Lions, is a huge dick. That's because there are reports going around alleging that Raiola spent part of his Sunday verbally assaulting the University of Wisconsin marching band, which was in Green Bay to play at this week's Lions-Pa...

<em>SNL's</em> Jay Pharoah Does A Tremendous Shannon Sharpe Impression
Jay Pharoah is SNL's master impressionist, and although his Barack Obama may be a bit uninspiring, his Shannon Sharpe leaves nothing to be desired. Our only complaint has to do with his tie knot. That sucker needs to be much, much bigger....