ow Page 762 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Drunk Angels Fan Tries To Climb Fence At Postgame Show, Fails
C'mon, son. Have some pride. ...

Help! My Balls Smell!
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every other week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Email her....

Sports Editor Charged With Human Trafficking
Bobby Abplanalp, the sports editor for a tiny North Dakota newspaper, was one of two men arrested this week for allegedly trying to pay for sex with a person known to be under 18 years of age....
![Bill Simmons Is Pissed That <em>SportsCenter</em> Edited Out This Joke [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Bill Simmons Is Pissed That <em>SportsCenter</em> Edited Out This Joke [UPDATE]
Up above, Bill Simmons and the rest of the NBA Countdown crew discuss how Dwyane Wade transmogrified himself last night into an All-Star once again. Magic Johnson wonders if he could do it again for Game 5, and Michael Wilbon says he'll benefit from getting two off days. ...


Dwight Howard Will Voice A Turkey In A Movie About...Turkeys
The film is called Free Birds. Owen Wilson, Amy Poehler and Colm Meaney, who will clearly voice the Asshole Turkey, are in it. Dwight Howard will voice a character named Cold Turkey. Do you get it?...

Andre Drummond Abuses Chris Brown On A Dunk
Andre Drummond, coming off a promising rookie year in Detroit, went to town all over Chris Brown and his detestable self at a Los Angeles gym yesterday. Vine time:...

The Invisible Man
Peace to reader A.J. Travis for suggesting Wright Thompson's ESPN story, "Shadow Boxing":...

Somebody Broke Off A Huge Piece Of Clemson's Special Rock
According to various reports, another one of college football's sacred totems has been vandalized beyond repair. Police say that somebody recently broke into the Clemson University football stadium and broke a huge chunk off Howard's Rock. The stone sits on a pedestal at the top of the hill that the...


This U.S. Open Cup Golazo Was One Of The Fastest In Timbers History
MLS' Portland Timbers are taking on the Tampa Bay of the North American Soccer League tonight in the U.S. Open Cup, and the Timbers wasted no time. ...
![Howie Schwab Among The Layoffs At ESPN [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18cmoy5hhtmyjjpg.jpg)
Howie Schwab Among The Layoffs At ESPN [UPDATE]
Round 2 of the ESPN bloodletting began today, and a source tells us that Howie Schwab—remember Stump the Schwab?—was among those let go. ...
![Tennis Channel CEO: Comcast Battle Like "Being Raped By Brutal Captor" [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18qivwajrb351jpg.jpg)
Tennis Channel CEO: Comcast Battle Like "Being Raped By Brutal Captor" [UPDATE]
Two weeks ago, a federal appeals court ruled that Comcast did not have to put Tennis Channel on its basic cable service and could, instead, throw it on a more-expensive sports tier. The court overturned an FCC ruling in the process. Tennis Channel was unhappy about this. In fact, Tennis Channel CEO ...

Last Pitch
A week of Father's Day stories continues. This little gem comes from Glenn Stout:...

Mexican Fans Drill Costa Rican Soccer Player In The Head With Debris
Mexico played Costa Rica tonight at the Azteca Stadium in Mexico City in a match everyone thought was Mexico's to lose. They didn't lose, but Mexico were frustrated by the plucky visiting side, and by the 78th minute, the score remained 0-0. That's when Costa Rica captain Bryan Ruiz ran over to take...

Javier Mascherano Kicks Driver Carting Him Off Field, Gets Red Carded
This is so dumb....

Health Is Bad For You: My Weird Weekend At Toronto's Fitness Shitshow
TORONTO—"Dear Toronto Pro Supershow Delegate," read a slip of paper handed to everyone checking in at Toronto's Intercontinental Hotel on Friday. "For your convenience we have 'Special Towels' through our Housekeeping Department. We recommend that these special towels/ linens be used in conjunction ...


The Four Most Punchable Faces In Human History
Before we get to the Funbag, some notes of vital interest. If you're in New York tomorrow night, I'll be doing Scott Rogowsky's Running Late show over in Brooklyn. It's like a live talk show-type thing. You can buy tickets here. You get a free beer (not kidding) if you mention Deadspin at the door, ...

ESPN Mentioned Tim Tebow 137 Times In 120 Minutes
The Worldwide Leader has really outdone itself....