ow Page 771 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Domonic Brown Is Your New Favorite Slugger
If you haven't been paying attention to what Phillies left fielder Domonic Brown has been doing this season, now is the time to start. In the first inning of yesterday's game against the Brewers, Brown hit the absolute bejesus out of a Mike Fiers pitch, depositing the ball into the second deck in ri...

Reporter Gets In A "Tongue Twat" Trying To Congratulate Cliff Lee
Cliff Lee recorded career strikeout number 1600 yesterday, and Philadelphia reporter Sigourney McCreaf wanted to relay some fans' congratulations to Lee on the Phillies postgame show. Unfortunately, she got her tongue all twatted up. ...

Wrigley Field: Home Of The Pantomimed Blowjob
Remember this jackass? He made his way onto TV in a late-night, nothing game in Chicago and made blowjob gestures for a whole inning. He had at least two competitors during today's Diamondbacks-Cubs action today at Wrigley Field....

This German Keeper's Own Goal Against USA Is The Worst Own Goal
This is promising German goalkeeper Marc-André ter Stegen, and holy shit....

Roy Hibbert Had A Bizarre Post-Game Press Conference
In one press conference Roy Hibbert dropped a "no homo" and called reporters "motherfuckers."...

The Best-Kept Secret
Another sure-shot for you—David Owen's 1982 Esquire piece on the late, great Murray Kempton: ...

This Own Goal From Chivas USA Defender Mario de Luna Makes Us Sad
Midway through the first half in last night's MLS clash between the Seattle Sounders and Chivas USA, Sounders midfielder Mauro Rosales broke free down the right flank and lofted a ball into the box towards an open Obafemi Martins. But Rosales overshot his target, and the cross floated all the way to...

Is Tim Tebow's NFL Career Over? His Camp Is Torn
In a story in ESPN The Magazine's upcoming issue, writer David Fleming goes long on the NFL's casting out of Tim Tebow and questions whether the free agent quarterback still has a future in the NFL. The answer Fleming comes up with: probably not....

Taste Test: Uncrustables. What Does The Crustless PB&J Say About Us?
One of parenthood's myriad challenges, as any parent will attest, is finding the time in one's overscheduled, playdate- and tedious-errand-choked day to make weirdo peanut-butter-and-jelly-stuffed pierogi to foist upon our frightened and sobbing children. Thankfully, somebody at The J.M. Smucker Co...

Help! My Couch Is Humiliating!
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every other week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Email her....

Pirates Broadcaster On The Pirates' Hot Streak: "This Is Kinky!"
The Pittsburgh Pirates, you guys! They've been spanking their fans for years, but now they've won 19 games in May. They haven't lost a series since May 5. Last night they won 1-0 for the fourth time in 11 games. And cuddly color man Steve Blass is just tickled by it all....

A Woman Won A Million Dollars On <em>Wheel Of Fortune</em> Last Night
A $1 million prize was added to Wheel of Fortune in 2008, but it's only been won once since then, because it's really freaking hard to do....


This Time, The Egg Avoided Jim Knox's Face
Let's recount our Jim Knox greatest hits:...

Bill Simmons Thinks Memphis Fans Get Tense Because MLK Was Shot There
For many years now, Bill Simmons has positioned himself as a kind of ULTRA fan. He's not simply the voice of the fan anymore. He is more fan than you. He understands fandom in a way that you could not possibly understand. He understands that when fans get loud, things are going well! And when fans ...

Chicago's Go-Ahead Goal Was Waved Off Because Of Off-Setting Penalties
Coincidental minor penalties and 1:47 are all that stood between the Chicago Blackhawks and a Game 7 win over the Red Wings. ...

Rob Gronkowski Needs Another Goddamned Surgery
Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski will have yet another surgery, this time on his back, and is expected to miss part of training camp. That's the best-case scenario....

OF Trips On Bullpen Mound, Fails To Make Catch, Plays For Marlins
Poor Marcell Ozuna just can't catch a break. The Marlins rightfielder actually saw where this fly ball was going off the bat of Evan Longoria, and he probably would have caught it if not for that bullpen mound. That stupid, reckless, what-the-fuck-is-that-doing-there bullpen mound....

Here and Now
Ali. The Greatest. There is an entire body of sports writing devoted to him. For more than a generation it's as if every writer worth his or her salt had to tackle him at one point. ...
