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2013 NFL Pro Bowl Live Blog

Weather may be an issue, but that won't stop us from bringing you a running account of the biggest hits and most exciting plays in this year's star-studded NFL Pro Bowl. ...

NFL.com: "Pro Bowl Might Be Hampered By Rainy, Windy Weather"

OK, OK—keep it together, man. Don't laugh. "Hampered by rain." Don't you dare laugh. Just—just read the article. You can do that. "...billed this year's Pro Bowl as Peyton Manning vs. Eli Manning, a battle of the brothers, with the headline: 'Footballs Will Fly.'"...

Mike Francesa Has A Police Escort To New Orleans For The Super Bowl

The Legend of Mike Francesa continues to grow. Months removed from falling asleep mid-interview and days removed from screwing contestants of his Super Bowl ticket giveaway extravaganza, comes news that the Sports Pope arrived on his flight to New Orleans out of LaGuardia in Queens, N.Y., via police...

Steve Spurrier Gave Reporters Envelopes Full Of Cash Today, For Some Reason

Old weirdo and known media manipulator Steve Spurrier had an improptu chat with reporters at halftime of the Arkansas-South Carolina basketball game today, and did one somewhat odd thing, followed by one extremely odd thing: He asked the reporters a college football trivia question—a self-serving on...

Georgetown Beats Louisville In Game That Was 24 Seconds Longer Than Regulation And Came Down To The Final Possession

Fifth-ranked Louisville dropped its third consecutive game today to Georgetown in what was a one-possession struggle for the final six minutes of action. Those final six minutes, strangely, were actually a bit more than that; the clock inexplicably stopped at 6:07 and stayed that way for 24.37 sec...

How To Cook Lobster Tails: A Guide For People Who Don't Have Butlers To Do All The Work

Somewhere along the way, lobster became the symbol of gustatory luxury. You picture your stereotypical Person Of Means sitting down to a feast—me, I always picture olde-tymey plutocrats in top hats and tails, monocled, even the women and babies, because my experience of society's upper class begins ...

The Most Recent Fainting Spell Over Shabazz Muhammad Distills NCAA Compliance To Its Idiotic Essence

Shabazz Muhammad spent the first three games of UCLA's season—and his college career—sitting on the bench while the NCAA deliberated on whether he'd committed a minor infraction that he'd specifically been advised not to worry about when he committed it. When he was finally reinstated, he got back ...

Redskins OL Trent Williams Will Miss The Pro Bowl Because A Nightclub Patron Tasered Him And Cracked A Bottle On His Head

Yesterday, the Vikings announced that Matt Kalil would be taking over for Redskins offensive lineman Trent Williams in this Sunday's Pro Bowl. The Vikings couldn't supply any details and, as the Pro Bowl is an especially inessential exhibition, some speculated that Williams was merely resting from i...

Here's A Photo Of Dick Vitale And The Schwab Out Clubbing In South Beach [UPDATED]

The reader who sent this to us (click to enlarge) said it was taken at the Fontainebleau in Miami, sometime Wednesday night, sometime after Dickie V.'s Dookies got thumped by the Hurricanes. We haven't been able to verify any of that, but we think the image speaks for itself. [Update (7:10 p.m.): Th...

A Lip Reader Deciphers The Umpire-Manager Arguments Of 2012

Originally published in Baseball Prospectus....

<em>Washington Post</em> Drags Victim's Mother To His Grave To Remind Us That Nobody Is Paying Attention To The Ray Lewis Murder Case [Update: The <i>Buffalo News</i> Too!]

"Here he is right here," Priscilla says with a smile....

Cedric Benson's Dogs Are A Scourge Upon Local Livestock

Green Bay Packers running back and part-time strip club DJ Cedric Benson is not very good at controlling his murderous dogs. According to the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel, Benson was recently issued a citation after his two Rottweilers went on a violent rampage against some innocent livestock....

Rob Ryan Was Out Of Work For 22,987 Minutes

Firing confirmed by Tim MacMahon at 4:54 PM, January 8th (EST):...

The Puppy Bowl lineup has been released. Harry FTW....

Who Wants To Go To The Super Bowl With This Awful Human Being?

What's up, ladies? Do you like the Ravens? Would you like a ticket to the Super Bowl? Are you "hot?" Are you open to performing an "HJ/BJ/etc." in exchange for said Super Bowl ticket? Well then, this Craigslist ad is for you!...

The 49ers Will Stick With David Akers For The Super Bowl

Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Missed kicks? San Francisco's GM isn't worried....

Chelsea's Eden Hazard Kicks Ballboy, Is Sent Off From League Cup Semifinal Match

If you thought a League Two side making it to the League Cup final would be the weirdest thing to happen in the semifinals of the Capital One-sponsored English football competition, you'd be wrong. Chelsea, facing a 2-0 aggregate disadvantage on the road in Wales, later found themselves down a man...

Headline Above Newspaper's Blowjob Pantomime Photo: "Taking Hard Hit To Chin"

Yesterday, we all had a good laugh at the Columbus Dispatch's photo of the pivotal play from Monday night's Red Wings-Blue Jackets game. Something something Damien Brunner scored a shootout goal something something we think the Red Wings won something something ... oh, look: That fan in the front ro...

Which Pundits Predicted A Ravens-49ers Super Bowl? Grading ESPN And <em>Sports Illustrated</em>

Republished with permission from PunditTracker.com...

A Pissed Off Bill Callahan Responds To Tim Brown And Jerry Rice

Someone finally got around to telling Bill Callahan that two of his former players have accused him of throwing Super Bowl XXXVII, and he is not happy. Here's a statement that Callahan released via NFL.com in response to accusations by Tim Brown and Jerry Rice that he lost the Super Bowl on purpose...