ow Page 958 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Remembering The "Lorchcast," Worst Sportscast Ever
On Dec. 19, 1995, Matt Lorch, a fill-in sportscaster for KHQA in Quincy, Illinois, endured nearly six minutes on-air with malfunctioning videos, unplanned catch-phrases, and one of the most heartbreaking sighs ever sighed. Fifteen years later, we remember Lorchcast....

Gregg Easterbrook Is Still A Putz
Here are four sentences from last week's Tuesday Morning Quarterback column (or as I like to call it, יום שלישי הקוורטרבק בוקר). They are remarkable in that they pile stupidly on top of one another like a litter of puppies....

Frivolous Lawsuit Theater: Seahawks Fan Hit By Jet's Giant Snowball Wants Some Money
You'll recall the Jets being pelted with snowballs by the Seattle crowd, when Shaun Ellis decided to return the favor. Two years later, a fan has decided to sue....

And The Crowd Pelts The Corner Kicker With Snowballs …
This post, written by Josh Burt, is republished with permission from The Spoiler. Go there often if you like soccer stuff....

The NFL Has Its Cigar Guy Moment
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Yankees Fan Of The Year Michael LaPayower Gets Paid
Big Yankees Fan Michael LaPayower will have you know that the videos you giggled at won him a $2,500 shopping spree at the Steiner Sports 1977-78 Yankees Show silent auction....

Matt Bonner Feels Like New Balance Failed Him Last Night
San Antonio Spurs forward Matt Bonner's right New Balance shoe fell apart during last night's game against Memphis, so he intentionally fouled Zach Randolph and put himself out there for another shoe company's taking....

Your NFL Late Games Open Thread
The NY Jets play Pittsburgh today. Even Franco Harris will be rooting for Rex Ryan after watching the infuriatingly horrendous attempt at humor below, brought to you by the fine people at the Eagle Tribune....

You Must Call Him Starting NFL Quarterback Tim Tebow Now, Bitches
ESPN's reporting that "sources" told "NFL Insider" Adam Schefter that Tim Tebow will start tomorrow's Broncos game against the Oakland Raiders. G(o)od vs. (D)evil. [ESPN, 12-18, 4:25]...

Your Saturday College Football Bowls Open Thread
Three bowl games today....

"No Limits" Snowmobile-Jump Record Attempt Limited By Snowmobile-Jump Injury
The ESPN/Red Bull "New Year. No Limits" event at which snowmobiler Levi LaVallee planned to break a world record by jumping over 301.5 feet of water was canceled after wing-less LaVallee crashed during practice. [SignOnSanDiego]...

Lenny Dykstra Won't Dispense Stock Tips And Autograph Balls For $35 At A Mall Today After All
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

This Is How You Give A Post-Game Interview
Rugby — it's just 30 men having a hug/fight. Still, when it comes to cutting through the post-match bullshit, Saracen's boss Brendan Venter has got it all worked out....

The Worst News Lede You'll Read All Year (UPDATE)
"For the past month, body parts have been piling up around Miami-Dade and Broward counties like extra pounds on Kim Kardashian come Christmas time." [Miami New-Times, Google cache Screengrab below]...
![Merry [Bleep]ing Christmas From Ozzie Guillen](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Merry [Bleep]ing Christmas From Ozzie Guillen
What could be better than the quirky White Sox manager under your tree Christmas morning? This foulmouthed outtake reel, wherein Ozzie tries to sell you his nipples, or something....

Merril Hoge Will Say "Factorback" As Often As He Damn Well Pleases, OK?
Reader Andrew, tired of hearing ESPN's Merril Hoge say "factorback" as if the word actually meant something, recently decided to send the man an email through his website. Soon, Andrew got a testy reply, signed "Merril (Factorback)."...

How Low Can Joe Paterno Go? What Coaches Do When They Hang Out
Former Texas A&M Coach R.C. Slocum seems like a stand-up guy. That's why we think he won't mind us highlighting some of his favorite photos through the years, as posted on his Facebook page....

Something Officially Went Down At Iowa
ESPN reports that two of Iowa's running backs will not play in the Insight Bowl. The Hawkeyes suspended sophomore Adam Robinson for "failing to comply with team expectations and policies," and sophomore Jewel Hampton left the team on his own volition....

This Is Terrible Sports TV Banter
Charlie Nicholas broke off from rambling on about "set PCs," and Blackpool players "Kaka" and "T.J. Campbell" to deliver a great contender for worst comeback of the century on Soccer Saturday this weekend....

Something's Going Down At Iowa
Like rats leaving a sinking ship, sports books have taken the Insight Bowl off the board. It's the surest sign that the forthcoming Iowa press release could be something significant....