owl Page 161 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
That's Not How You Football
The Chiefs grabbed a first-quarter turnover as Buccaneers quarterback Jameis Winston lost his faculties—and the football....
Team Of Bad Soccer Men Does All Sorts Of Bad Soccer Man Stuff
Meet the UMass Boston Beacons, who should more accurately be known as the UMass Boston Bad Soccer Men after their violent displays during this Division III tournament game against Haverford College....
Warriors And Suns Enact Humanity's Doomed Search For Meaning<em></em>
The Warriors beat the Suns 133-120 tonight, but the game wasn’t entirely the display of offensive efficiency suggested by that final score. Here’s a sequence of abject futility and a metaphor for the human condition in 2016—saved, as we are always, by Stephen Curry....
Professional Tennis Player Takes Set While Serving Underhand
Mackie McDonald was up 4-3 in the first set against Peter Polansky during today’s ATP Challenger event in Knoxville, before taking an injury timeout. When he returned, he could no longer slam a strong and righteous overhead serve. So he settled for these little underhand slices. ...
Bruins Go Five-Hole For Own Goal
The Bruins were murder on goalies last night, chasing Sergei Bobrovsky with four goals on nine shots in their eventual 5-2 win over the Blue Jackets. They got to Tuukka Rask too, even though he plays for them. Defenseman Colin Miller mishandled the puck and put it right between Rask’s legs for an ow...
New York Basketball Is Perfect And Pristine
We’ve been blessed with a few sequences of perfect basketball already this season, and last night the Knicks and Nets served up a hot slice of authentic “Big Apple” hoops. This encapsulates everything you need to know about the state of basketball in this city, whose crown prince is Brandon Jennings...
All Hell Breaks Loose On Bills Field Goal Attempt
With three seconds left in the first half of the Seahawks-Bills game, chaos took over....
Texas Tech Increases Lead On Texas With 100-Yard Fumble Return Touchdown
Texas running back D’Onta Foreman was a profile in courage as he dragged half a dozen Texas Tech defenders to the goal line. Then, tragically, he fumbled—and the Red Raiders’ Douglas Coleman picked up the ball for a 100-yard fumble return touchdown, turning the Longhorns’ go-ahead score into a TTU l...
Falcons-Buccaneers, <i>Thursday Night Football</i>, LIVE
It’s time again to let the Tecmo Super Bowl computer duke it out to simulate tonight’s Atlanta-Tampa Bay game. Who will win? Tune in to find out, LIVE: ...
Cristiano Ronaldo Played Like Shit Yesterday
The most shocking scoreline of yesterday’s round of Champions League matches was definitely the 3-3 draw between reigning European champions Real Madrid and Polish giants (but European minnows) Legia Warsaw. How could a team of Gareth Bale, Karim Benzema, and—above all—Cristiano Ronaldo fail to beat...
Sixers And Hornets Give Up, Decide To Just Sort Of Flail Everywhere<em></em>
We’ve brought you a lot of dumb basketball lately, but good lord, this here sequence from the Sixers and Hornets is the worst offense yet. ...
Fast Break Reinvented
One time I was playing basketball and I fell and my shorts came off somehow. That’s about as bad as what happened to Sam Dekker here, or more accurately, what Sam Dekker did to himself....
Dexter Fowler Starts Game 7 With A Leadoff Donger
Corey Kluber is starting for the third time in the past nine days, and he gave up a dinger to Dexter Fowler on his fourth pitch of the evening. Fowler wasn’t sure it’d clear the fence but he rounded second and yelled backwards at the Cubs dugout after the dinger fell....
Zinedine Zidane's Kid Gave Up A Dumb Own Goal
This here’s Luca Zidane. He’s the teenage son of Real Madrid manager Zinedine Zidane and he plays keeper for Real Madrid’s youth team. They played Legia Warsaw today, just like their senior side, and Zidane gave up a dumbass own goal in stoppage time....
Rudy Gay's Game-Winning Attempt Missed Everything But His Teammate's Head
Rudy Gay had 30 points and 12 boards in a valiant loss for the Sacramento Kings down in Miami tonight. The team can take heart in their near-win against an Eastern Conference playoff team on the road. They can not, however, find much to like about the last play of regulation. Gay got the rock, fired...
Let's Check In On Joakim Noah And The Knicks
The Knicks traveled to play fellow mediocre-ish Eastern Conference squad Detroit this evening, and Joakim Noah did this. Turns out, a shitty Vine of someone’s TV is the perfect way to show you this “highlight.”...
Cleveland Gifted A Few Runs To Chicago With Some Dumbass Defense
It was a perfectly normal, albeit disappointing, first-inning development when Josh Tomlin followed up two quick outs by laying an easy curveball for Kris Bryant to jerk out of the ballpark. Much less normal, however, was the way the Indians gave up their next two runs to the Cubs....
Laser Focus
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Your Monday Night Football Tecmo Super Bowl Simulation Is Live
Vikings! Bears! Monday Night Football! It’s LIVE:...
Boy, <i>Thursday Night Football</i> Is The Best, Isn't It?
We are blessed by the NFL’s benevolence in its grace to provide us the finest professional football every Thursday night. We aren’t worthy of witnessing the incredible talents of the Jacksonville Jaguars weekly—let alone in such a showcase as Thursday Night Football....