own Page 321 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Ozzie Guillen Just Might Have Lost It
Because when you're waxing lyrical about desecrated statutes of a team that started not only A.J. Pierzynski but Scott Podsednik and Carl Everett, you might just be off your rocker....
To Minnesota Weatherman, A Tornado Warning Was More Important Than Angry Calls From Soccer Fans
Here's what tipster B. Hurley sent in to explain why soccer fans in the Greater Twin Cities region are so pissed off at their local Fox affiliate's "meteorologist" for interfering with the UEFA Champions League final yesterday:...
FC Barcelona Proved They Were The Best Team In All Of Professional Sports Yesterday
Your morning roundup for May 29, the day Roger Ebert inexplicably gave two thumbs down to those who blatantly allowed two eyes to check out two foreign boobs....
Mets' New Owner Is Poker Whiz, Dave Kingman Impersonator, Ball-Busting Wall Street Turk
The cash-strapped Mets are in talks to sell a minority stake in the team to hedge fund manager David Einhorn for $200 million. Normally, minority shareholders aren't news, but these Mets aren't in a normal situation. With more than a billion dollars at stake in the Bernie Madoff lawsuit, the team he...
Phillies Infielder Throws 10-Pitch 19th Inning To Close Out Joey Votto And The Reds
Your morning roundup for May 26, the day after Disney realized that it probably wasn't the best of ideas to trademark American heroes for profit....
The Five Geniuses You Meet In Heaven: Mitch Albom Discovers The Apple Store
After that whole thing about him winning a Red Smith Award that he probably shouldn't have won, Albom's stayed out of the spotlight. Or, wait, no: He's written a play and developed a TNT show. And, somewhere along the way, he found time to visit the Apple Store and write about it....
Kobe Wants More Of A Say In Who Will Be The Lakers' Sideline Prop
The Lakers are reportedly set to hire former Cavs coach Mike Brown to succeed Phil Jackson. Actual coach/GM Kobe Bryant is said to be "surprised" by the news because he expected to see L.A. assistant Brian Shaw promoted to the position and was "not a part of the decision-making process." [SI]...
Today In "You Don't Fucking Say"
Headline on a story that checked in at 1,655 words and required the contributions of 10 Associated Press reporters: "Drinking linked to problems in the ballpark stands." [AP]...
Tortured Analogy Leads Tiki Barber To Declare Himself A "Reverse Anne Frank"
The Tiki Barber image rehab tour kicks off in earnest (remember, he's planning to play again) with a big Sports Illustrated profile dropping tomorrow. In it, he tells a story of the time he went into hiding in the attic of his agent, Mark Lepselter....
Here's Tim Thomas With The Best Save Of The Playoffs
That endorsement from hockey minds across Twitter tonight. Steve Downie, in a one-goal game, would probably agree....
This Is The Story Of Two Elegant Latvian Women Roofying And Robbing A Weatherman In South Beach
The scam itself has the makings of a sexy Liam Neeson vengeance-comedy. After young beauties from Estonia, Latvia and the like brought their talents to South Beach, via the U.S. Department of Homeland Security Visa Waiver Program, they were trained in luring wealthy-looking businessmen to fake nigh...
ESPN And Publisher Alike: None Of These Guys Are Having Any Fun
Not two days since the embargo was lifted, the giant dragon fart of a book known as Those Guys Have All the Fun has left both publisher and subject alike strategizing about a new defense. Yes, ESPN officially threw together a semi-emergency town hall meeting ("tent"!!!!) earlier this afternoon for s...
Yankees Broadcaster John Sterling Is Down With The Black Panthers
The Wall Street Journal's Mike Sielski decided to get in on Yankee Legend Instability Week (brought to you by Utz!), with a story today about longtime Yankees radio voice John Sterling, whose contract expires at the end of the year....
Deadspin Classic: Dick Ebersol Is The Biggest Failure Of Them All
In the wake of Dick Ebersol's messy resignation from NBC Sports, we revisit the writings of a former NBC employee, who remembers Ebersol's failures being as legendary as his accomplishments....
More Misplaced Rhetoric From Pro Football Talk
De Smith says the NFL is the "first league in the history of sports that has ever sued to not play their game," which, like a lot of slogans, isn't entirely accurate (the NFL hasn't sued), even if it accurately conveys the sense that the NFL is taking great pains to get its lockout. Mike Florio has ...
Jason Whitlock Is Trying To Get America Working Again, And You Are Ungrateful
Way back in August, during his Last Stand In Kansas City, Jason Whitlock told radio host Nick Wright that "Democracy's almost already dead."...
Nobody Wins When Batman Gets The Ever-Living Shit Kicked Out Of Him In Public
This is just sad. Guy slides into a Batman costume and tries to shake down tourists in a cash-for-photo scheme that ends up killing off the myth of superheroism (or quasi-superheroism) once and for all. Let this be a lesson to false idols everywhere: Making lewd comments to critics is nowhere near...
Older Charles Oakley Responds To Violence With Lawsuits Instead Of Fists
Former Knicks/Bulls/Wizards/Raptors/Rockets enforcer and current Charlotte Bobcats assistant coach Charles Oakley is suing the Aria hotel-casino at MGM's CityCenter complex in Vegas because security delivered onto him a "gang-style beat down" when he tried to get into the VIP-pool area. This alleg...
Here's Video Of Matthew Barnaby Leaving Jail And A Statement From His Agent
After his arrest and not-guilty plea to charges stemming from a "domestic incident," an agent for ESPN hockey analyst Matthew Barnaby issued a statement on behalf of his client. Here it is:...
ESPN: It's "Inappropriate For Us To Comment" On ESPN Analyst Matthew Barnaby's "Domestic Incident" Arrest
According to a story posted on ESPN.com just after 2:30 p.m. eastern today, ESPN the network declined comment on "ESPN analyst and former NHL veteran" Matthew Barnaby spending the night in jail, as mentioned in a morning post here....