own Page 381 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

OK, Lou Holtz Apologized; Will ESPN Discipline Him?
As you're surely aware of by now, Lou Holtz made the unfortunate mistake of comparing Adolf Hitler to Michigan coach Rich Rodriguez on the air last night. Rodriguez's non-existent mustache has yet to issue a statement. ESPN wisely (if inconsiderately) roused Mr. Holtz from the comfort of his bed th...

Bonnie Bernstein's Legs Open Momentarily; DVR's Perk Up
On Tuesday morning's First Take, in the first hour (at about the :39 minute mark), many readers alerted us to what transpired. And what happened, friends, was Bonnie Bernstein momentarily forgetting that she was wearing a skirt on television, and when she adjusted herself, well, let's just say that...

Lou Holtz Might Be Taking Some Time Off
So, we didn't see this live and, at 7:30 on a Friday, well, most people who handle the video uploading duties over here are out enjoying the weekend, but according to many readers, and a couple of message boards, Lou Holtz just dropped a Hitler reference during one installment of College Football Li...

Scoop Jackson Would Like To Get Real With You For A Minute
Buried at the bottom of Page 2 today is a clarification from columnist Scoop Jackson, who caused a veritable shitstorm thanks to his B.J. Upton column, when he haphazardly implied that Upton's laziness was a reason for young African-Americans to look up to him. Not really what he meant, of course, b...

Kellen Winslow: Please Stop Asking About My Junk
Good news, Browns fans. Your cantankerously talented tight end Kellen Winslow is no longer suffering from a mysterious ailment that may or may not be related to his testicular area. And...he might even suit up against the Redskins. Winslow addressed the media at practice today and let them know that...

Scoop Jackson's Column Continues to Offend; Jason Whitlock Demands Swift Editorial Execution
Scoop Jackson has once again sparked the ire of, oh, lots of people with this latest ESPN2 column about the Tampa Bay Rays’ B.J. Upton. In it, Jackson praises Upton as the one MLB player who can “bring the game back to the hood” while using some undermining and preposterous logic to substantiate his...

You Should Probably Stop Having Birthday Parties When You're 11
I turned 33 over the weekend. There's something inherently sad about a single 33-year-old man hosting his own birthday party. I remember when my father turned 33; I was 11. It was my parents, my sister and myself eating tacos and watching the Cardinals game. That was pretty fun. I've had birthday b...

Hey, Wait A Minute, Didn't Braylon Edwards Go To Michigan?
Here's Cleveland wide receiver Braylon Edwards proudly representing the school logo ... unfortunately though, it's the wrong school. We know that the Wolverines have been struggling lately, but Penn State, a Big Ten rival? That's cold, man. Edwards channeled the JoePa mojo to catch five passes for 1...

Giants Fear Dreaded Bone Lady Trap Game
I'll put some of the inevitable gloom-and-doom reports of the Red Sox/Rays game after it's over should the score hold up — still 5-0 Rays, Sox fans booing — but let's not forget there's also a Monday Night Football game this evening between the NFC East leading New York Giants and the still-waiting-...

Memo to Adam Jones from Stephen A. Smith: You're Making All Black People Look Bad
Since the NBA season hasn't officially begun and the WWL has finally found out he's not as viable a sports star as they once hoped, Stephen A. Smith's visibility on ESPN has been limited. But last week Smith went into full-on ALL CAPS-mode while biding his time in the on-air personality purgatory kn...

Goodbye, Big Brown; You're In A Better Place Now ... Jersey
As we told you earlier, tragedy befell Aqueduct racetrack early this morning when Kentucky Derby and Preakness winner Big Brown injured his right front hoof during a workout. He was immediately retired. And as you may have guessed, it didn't take long for horse fans to burst forth with their emotion...

No Way McCain Loses Ohio Now
In politics it's known as the Brady Quinn Bounce, and John McCain has it. Our Cleveland Browns hero made a surprise appearance at a Strongsville, Ohio Republican rally on Wednesday (along with Browns lineman Joe Thomas), where he told enthusiastic McCain-Palin supporters at the Walter F. Ehrnfelt Re...

Stuart Scott is Desperate to Avoid Any Photographic Evidence of Him Chatting Up Cheerleaders
Many ESPN personalities and other sports-reporter level famous individuals are paranoid about humiliating photos of them popping up on the internet. Thankfully, most of the recognizable faces at the WWL have made peace with the notion that, yes, if they are photographed gawking at Kendra Wilkinson o...

Oh, For The Days Of Rape And Murder Questions At Debates
The second Presidential debate is tonight, coinciding, quite helpfully, with the first night off of the baseball postseason. I spend about 45 percent of my workday reading political blogs from all sides of the spectrum, some conservative, some (OK, more) liberal, and absolutely none written by tha...

Rich Eisen's Wife Scolds Sarah Palin For Post-Debate Parading of Down Syndrome Baby
Rich Eisen's wife, former ABC Sportscaster Suzy Shuster, has this occasional column for lib dumping ground The Huffington Post and is fast emerging as one of the most terrifying women on the planet due to her attack dog writing-style. Last Friday, Shuster took the vice presidential nominee to task f...

Former Buxom Football Broadcaster Hilariously Steamed at Fair-Weathered Pats' Fans
As posted last week, former Fox NFL correspondent Lisa Guerrero started blogging (or diaristing) a sports-ish column for the LA Times' "Fabulous Forum" blog page. Guerrero, who's probably best known for being resident jiggly-wiggly during the creepy Tom Arnold years of "Best Damn Sports Show Period"...

This Column Is Desperate For A Bailout
Before we get started, a few words on America's financial crisis. (Because hey, who knows more about our economy than a sports blogger from Nowhere, Illinois?) I am going to apply my years of insight as reporter for Registered Rep. magazine, as well as my minutes upon minutes of CNBC viewing, to ex...

As A Writer, ESPN's Rob Neyer Thinks Todd Jones Is No Doug Glanville
Recently retired reliever Todd Jones is getting a nice send-off by most players, fans and beat writers for his many years of baseball service and overall good-guyness. And despite his many shaky late-inning outings, Jones will retire as the Tigers all-time saves leader. Jones also made a name for hi...

John Clayton's A Little Gassy In The Morning
And now for a little stomach-churning media goodness. One of the inevitable downsides of ESPN's new "Live" SportsCenter are some of the slip-ups that occur during live broadcasts which unfortunately make it to air. Case in point — this morning, at approximately 10:28, it appears NFL beat reporter J...

Wrigley Field Destroys A Man's Soul
I spent last weekend at Wrigley Field, watching the stupid Cubs clinch their stupid division and drink some stupid champagne in front of their stupid fans. It was the first time my father had ever been to Wrigley Field, and I have to think it'll be his last. Poor guy. He makes it nearly 60 years wi...