Paul Goldschmidt - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Don’t worry folks, the St. Louis Cardinals still suck
We’ll get the “motherfuck” possibilities out of the way at the top, and perhaps immediately speaking to them will hold them off for a little while longer. But they will happen. 1. The NL Central is complete clown-shoes, and no matter how bad the St. Louis Cardinals play they’ll never be out of it. 2...
Stop asking Yadier Molina to walk through that door
The St. Louis Cardinals have had a barely held-together beater vibe to them for a while. The only thing keeping the bumper attached is duct tape, two of the four-door handles work/are still attached, the windows are immovable, the muffler rusted off in a dorm parking lot years ago, and of course, th...
It’s never too early to laugh at the last-place Cardinals
Frustratingly, it doesn’t happen all that often, so when it does you kind of have to eschew the normal protocols of being guarded due to sample-size, and randomness in baseball. When the St. Louis Cardinals are in last place, you simply shoot that fucker right into the vein and kiss the sky. In our ...
Team USA loses exhibition to 3-9 San Francisco Giants
Mike Trout, Mookie Betts, Trea Turner, Nolan Arenado, Pete Alonso, Paul Goldschmidt, Kyle Schwarber. With a roster like that, you’d expect Team USA Baseball to dominate every game they play. They’re totally going to destroy Great Britain this Saturday in their first game of the World Baseball Classi...
Willson Contreras is a Cardinal, and the Cubs let it happen
The St. Louis Cardinals found their replacement for now-retired catcher Yadier Molina, agreeing to terms with Willson Contreras on a five-year, $87 million deal. After refusing to move Contreras at the trade deadline, or pay him, the last remaining position player from the Chicago Cubs World Series ...
Here are some alternative MLB awards to highlight underappreciated athletes
Last night, the American League and National League MVP Awards were handed out (Aaron Judge and Paul Goldschmidt, respectively), ending MLB’s week-long parade following the World Series celebrating the 2022 season. While the MVP and Cy Young Awards are great, they don’t pay any homage to the hard wo...
The warm glow of MLB Hot Stove’s warming glow: NL Central
It’s officially the offseason now, as we’ve gotten Scott Boras’s Fozzy Bear-in-the-college-dorm act at the GM Meetings. So let’s keep this record spinning right round and move to the NL Central, which I don’t feel personally about at all....
Has Aaron Judge played his last game in pinstripes and a look at some notable 2023 MLB free agents
MLB wants everyone to focus on the World Series right now. The organization wants the baseball world’s focus on the matchup between Houston Astros ace Justin Verlander and Philadelphia Phillies slugger Bryce Harper; the Aaron Nola vs. Yordan Alvarez showdown; and the fact that it’s a 1-seed going ag...
Good riddance, Yadi
While my baseball fandom was thrown in the trash by the Ricketts family, that doesn’t mean the fires of distaste and hatred burn any less. Our passions and love can ebb and flow, but the force of our animus for former rivals always remains strong. Maybe you’re a Red Sox fan out there that can never ...
MLB Wild Card Series predictions: Rays-Guardians, Mariners-Blue Jays, Phillies-Cardinals, Padres-Mets
The MLB playoffs begin today, and with that, eight teams will battle for the chance to compete against the Dodgers, Braves, Astros, and Yankees. Yikes! What an awful prize that is, am I right?...
Picking our MLB National League award winners
Yesterday, we gave you our picks for the American League awards. Today, we move to the Senior Circuit. While the National League didn’t have anyone hit 60 home runs or pitch and hit, it did have a multitude of strong, MVP-caliber performances. Aside from Sandy Alcantara most likely securing the Cy Y...
Will Pujols hit No. 700?
There’s no one on Earth hotter than Albert Pujols right now. In his last 10 games, Pujols is slugging 1.258. That is the second-highest mark of his career over any 10-game stretch, beaten only by his slugging percentage between August 6 and August 21 of this year: 1.259. Basically, at 42 years old. ...