pe Page 1175 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest. most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

Kentucky Boasts Top Eater, Fulmer Fumes
It's been a disappointing year for Kentucky fans, but now they can cheer on the top-ranked collegiate eater in the country....

Come On, You Gunners
It's Sunday, the grass is green, and the shirt is red. But forget Tiger for now, it's time for the Premier League's biggest match to date. Old Trafford is rocking (probably) and Arsenal is looking to salvage their season with a win over the table topping Red Devils. As a Chelsea fan, I'm obviously ...

Eli Manning's Reach-Around Courtesy Is Impressive
Yeah, that episode may not get by network censors....

The First Video Game To Come With An EKG
We don't have a Wii, but we almost want to buy one just for this game. (Our love for competitive eating is well documented.) Rare is the game that allows you to ZOOK! all over the table....

NHL Playoff Preview: The Twos Meets The Sevens
NHL Closer writer Greg Wyshynski previews the 2008 Stanley Cup Finals right up until they drop what is commonly referred to as "the puck."...

Gen. Petraeus Rocks The Wii Golf
Gen. Petraeus is testifying before Congress tomorrow. As you prepare your notes for his testimony, we ask you to remember his human side, his fun side, his ... Wii golf side. We understand: Sometimes golf can seem like a 100 Years Game to us too....

Jake Peavy Doesn't Have Hand
Before we get to Sunday's action, here's what they're saying about the Jake Peavy spitball controversy from over the weekend ......

Jake Peavy Packed Kenny Rogers' Hand Cream By Mistake
Earlier we told you of Jake Peavy's masterful one-run complete game win over the Los Angeles Dodgers. A reader sent in these "shots of the screen" indicting a smudginess of the index and middle fingers, and possibly the thumb....

Your North Carolina-Kansas Live Blog
Now, at last, is the Jayhawks' chance to extract some measure of revenge against Huckleberry Roy Williams, he who doesn't comprehend the enmity, by denying him another title that he couldn't win them. In this likely shootout, a lot hinges on whether the three-man rotation of Sasha Kaun (Sasha Kaun!)...

Female Cyclist Convicted In BALCO Case For Perjury, Growing Her Own Prostate
Cycling stories are remarkably easy to skip over. So much, in fact, that I skipped over five cycling stories during my morning piddle. But cyclist Tammy Thomas getting convicted in a BALCO-related case on three counts of perjury, well, just try to gloss over this mental image....

Posing As An Unknown ESPN Analyst Not The Way To Score Teens
That man to your right is ESPN college basketball analyst Mark Adams. Some of you may recognize him; most of you may not. That still didn't stop a 48-year-old New Jersey man from posing as Mark Adams in a failed attempt to shack up with a teenage girl....

Rick Reilly's Borscht Belt Hilarity Now Targeting Bloggers
We have a hard time getting fired up about this stuff anymore, but if you're looking for more enlightening commentary on new media from an "established" sportswriter — and a screenwriter (kind of) — let's take a listen to impending omnipresent ESPN commentator Rick Reilly....

Stanley Pringle: Jackin' It
You know, it's really annoying when athletes-masturbating-in-libraries stories break in the evening and we have to wait until morning to write about them. If we can't be your leader in library masturbation coverage, we're not sure what our point is....

About Last Night
What you missed while going to the beach and using your new Super Bowl ring to signal ships ... • NFL: Owners get together and cook up a bunch of goofy new rules. Fun! • NBA: Dirk is back, which evidently the Warriors weren't expecting. Dallas 111, Golden State 86. • NHL: Penguins clinch division ti...

Obama Really Just Wants To Be Dr. J
A couple of weeks ago, Barack Obama appeared on Philadelphia's 610 WIP sports radio station and made a somewhat controversial statement about his grandmother being a "typical white person," which got everybody all fired up. (Ironically? Most of them were typical white people.)...

Pedro Hears A Pop
You didn't think Mets fans were going to stay happy and optimistic about the season very long, did you? Pedro Martinez pulled/tore/yoinked his hamstring/tendon/groin/anal fissure and very well might miss a few weeks. As if just to rub it in, new reliever Matt Wise gave up a walk-off homer to Robert ...

The Deer Penis Diaries
Bad news for chronic deer penis ingesters planning on participating in the Beijing Olympics — you'll have to find something else to help you win a gold medal this year. Yes, deer penis and all sorts of other crazy Chinese voodoo medicines have officially been put on the no-no list by the Beijing IOC...

Finding Harry Pujols
OK Brian Suksomwong, you've got some competition. Meet Harry Pujols — he's Albert's cousin — who is a graphic artist from San Francisco. OK, OK, simmer down, class. It's not nice to make fun of people's names. Although, Harry chose to call himself that; he could have gone with Harold but didn't....

Not Much Worse Than An Opening Day Rainout
While at the Cardinals bar yesterday for Opening Day — the one from the book — we sat through an hour-and-a-half Cardinals rain delay just to hear that a 5-1 third-inning lead had been wiped out. The Cardinals aren't going to have many four runs leads this year. So losing one yesterday was unpleasan...