pe Page 661 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Oilers Should Probably Stop Sending Guys To New Jersey
The Edmonton Oilers are utter trash this year, despite the once-in-a-lifetime superstar they tanked their way into getting, so it’s hard to even chart exactly how bad they would be if they had to rely entirely on GM Peter Chiarelli’s deal-making ingenuity. But a look across the continent over in New...
<em></em>Clippers Empower Women Everywhere By Selling Ad Space To Dating App<em></em><em></em>
The Clippers have partnered with the dating app Bumble to create the latest advertisement to grace NBA jerseys. But lest you think this ad for the dating app known for requiring women to make the first move is, uh, just an ad for the dating app known for requiring women to make the first move—don’t ...
A Shot So Strange And Good You Have To Laugh
Fabio Fognini, tennis’s sleepy pirate and occasional misogynist, is typically the one doing all the comical, soft-handed trick shots in his matches. I’m the irritable eccentric here in my dumbass camouflage-and-skulls getup, says Fabio Fognini, to no one in particular. But while serving out the matc...
USA Rugby's Perry Baker Embarrasses Four Defenders On A Fantastic Try
USA Rugby won this weekend’s World Rugby Sevens Series event in Las Vegas, its first-ever USA Sevens championship, and, fittingly, American player Perry Baker had the highlight of the tournament. Baker was pinned near his own goal line, but he juked his way out of that tight spot, broke an open-fiel...
Penn Cut Down The Nets In An Empty Palestra At 2:15 Sunday Morning
PHILADELPHIA — A.J. Brodeur didn’t want to lie. Asked whether this was the first time he’d been in The Palestra after 2 a.m., he admitted it was....
Now Here Is One Cool-Ass Tennis Move With Potential Dick-Punishing Consequences
Second-seeded Fabio Fognini defeated third-seeded and three-time defending champion Pablo Cuevas in the Brasil Open semifinals today in Sao Paolo, 6-4 6-2. But hell with the results: the real winner here is Cuevas, for pulling off this slick-ass move in the second set:...
Would You Rather Be On A Barf Plane Or Have Your Flight Delayed?
Today, crazy winds wreaked havoc on the Northeast, blowing over trees, knocking out power, and causing a bunch of people on an airplane to barf their brains out....
Dammit, Rafael Nadal Will Be Out For A While
Subtract Rafael Nadal from any given tennis tournament, and boom—the participants collectively give 10,000 percent less of a shit about winning. He treasures every point of every match in every tournament. The man who won 16 Slams, including two last year, reportedly cried for two hours straight aft...
A Trip To The Big Ten In New York City, The Conference Basketball Tournament Everyone Hates
The Big Ten’s first trip to New York City has not been well received....
Requiem For A Forgotten Globetrotter
Originally published in the November, 1977 issue of Sport, and featured in the Library of America’s new basketball anthology, Basketball: Great Writing About America’s Game. It is reprinted here with permission....
James Harden Breaks Wesley Johnson's Ankles, Soul, Spirit
Wesley Johnson’s poor ankles went the way of all flesh tonight, sadly before their time. James Harden—who provided half of the Rockets’ scoring in a 34-point first quarter—was responsible:...
The Boban Show Is Captivating, Even If The Episodes Are Short
Late in the third quarter, with all their wings whirring and Nikola Jokic calmly calling the shots from the center, the Nuggets stretched their lead over the Clippers to 19. Tuesday’s game took on the shape of a blowout. If you want to radically alter the shape of a basketball game, add 7-foot-3 Bo...
Peterborough United Desperately Sweeps To End Snow Delay
Snow days were great, and if you have the opportunity to get one as an adult, you should absolutely take it. But props to third-tier English soccer team Peterborough United for powering through and doing the absolute most they could do to avoid going home early on account of the late-February flurri...
Anthony Davis Just Might Go Get The MVP
The AD and Boogie show was one of the best things going in the NBA, which made Boogie snapping his achilles tendon just before the All-Star break a downright depressing development. What’s definitely not depressing are the things Anthony Davis has been doing to the chumps who have had the misfortune...
Atlético Madrid Sell Yannick Carrasco In Latest Bit Of Chinese League Insanity
After a couple years’ worth of flabbergasting player transactions that sent relatively young, increasingly talented, borderline world-class players from some of the best leagues in Europe and South America to the gilded shores of China, this season felt quieter, like maybe normalcy had finally reass...
Chipper Jones Says There's No Reason For Civilians To Have AR-15s
Chipper Jones loves guns. Loves ‘em. He says he’s got five, including a shotgun and a rifle. (Though he says he prefers hunting with a bow because “it’s safer and more sporty.”) But even Jones says regular American civilians have no business being able to own assault weapons, like the AR-15 used to ...
Idiot On The Ice Dons Tutu, Monkey-Shaped Dick Pouch To Run On Rink After Olympic Medal Ceremony
Those who stuck around after the medal ceremony for men’s 1,000m speed skating today were treated to the sight of a rather portly man, clad in a very short pink tutu and a monkey-shaped pouch that held his dick, running on the ice to perform a little dance. ...
Surfing's Most Iconic Event Is In Jeopardy Thanks To A Very Dumb Dispute
Oahu’s Pipeline is one of the most famous surf spots in the world, and the North Shore beach’s notoriously big and dangerous waves play host to the World Surf League’s biggest event of the year. Pipeline Masters, or Pipe Masters, has taken place at Pipeline since 1971, and it’s traditionally served ...
Resourceful Soccer Teen Defends Himself From Angry Opponents By Weaponizing Corner Flag
As they so often do in South American soccer, things turned violent yesterday during a U20 Copa Libertadores match between Independiente del Valle and River Plate. Rather than get whaled on like another South American soccer teen we’ve seen recently, one Independiente player ran over to the corner f...