pe Page 721 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Michigan-Ohio State <i>Tecmo Super Bowl</i> Simulation Is Live!
It’s time for a CPU vs CPU simulation of The Game. Will Michigan win? Can Urban Meyer lead the Buckeyes to a huge victory? Find out, LIVE:...
What's About To Happen To CNN
For the journalists at CNN—everywhere, really, but especially at CNN—now is an appropriate time to become very afraid. ...
This Is A Good Hockey Family
Jake Guentzel made his NHL debut for the Pittsburgh Penguins tonight and he got to work immediately, scoring on his very first shot. But that’s not why we’re here. Guentzel’s first goal (he scored both Pittsburgh goals on the evening) was the mere appetizer for his family losing their collective shi...
Report: Adrian Peterson Could Be Back In A Month
Adrian Peterson’s career with the Vikings looked like it might have ended when he tore his meniscus in the second game of the season against the Packers. He had surgery two months ago, right after the injury, but even then, the prospects of return in 2016 looked bleak. Minimum recovery time from a “...
![Boo Mike Pence Whenever Possible [Updates]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/pkqbbu77umtz6us7k3lw.png)
Boo Mike Pence Whenever Possible [Updates]
Tonight, Vice President-elect Mike Pence decided to take in a performance of Hamilton. But apparently, as soon as he walked in the theater, the only good Hamilton fans in the world started booing like crazy. This is the sound Mike Pence should hear every single time he leaves his house. ...
Oh My God, This Might Be The Best Block I've Ever Seen
Remember Anthony Randolph, that dude who for a brief moment in time looked like he was going to be a real NBA star? Well, he’s still playing ball in Europe, and he just made one of the most incredible defensive plays I’ve ever seen....
Peggy Noonan Can Now Reveal Her Secret: Donald Trump Is Nice
Peggy Noonan, the breathless voice of hologram Ronald Reagan, had her doubts about this Donald Trump fellow. But now that he has safely been elected king, she has a very special story to share....
That Time Chris Paul Memorized An Eye Chart To Try And Cheat A Vision Test
Chris Paul got eye surgery this summer, a vision-enhancing procedure he needed for some time. It’s hard to believe that one of the best point guards of his generation got by without perfect vision for so long, but he apparently did. Paul’s brother and father got their eyes fixed during Paul’s rookie...
David Blaine Made Steph Curry, Drake, Dave Chappelle, And Jimmy Butler See God
David Blaine television specials are like evolved versions of Punk’d in that they seem to exist primarily to temporarily bring celebrities down to level of the viewer: astonished, freaked out, and unsure of what humanity is capable of. Last night ABC aired a new Blaine special called Beyond Magic, ...
You Guys, I Think The Winnipeg Jets Might Be...Good?
I feel entirely uncomfortable even noting this development, wary of some quantum observer effect in which quantifying Winnipeg’s success will cause them to go back to the futility with which the franchise has come to be synonymous. The Jets are a delicate baby bird, to be cupped ever-so-gently for f...
Pete Carroll Was Not Impressed By Patriots Fans
The Seahawks’ Sunday night win at the Patriots was a pretty excellent game between two of the NFL’s best, but Seattle coach Pete Carroll is wondering why it felt like a preseason crowd....
Pep Guardiola Apparently Gave His Players A Sex Curfew
Pep Guardiola is notoriously exacting. The Manchester City manager used to regulate which cars his players were allowed to drive while he was coaching at Barcelona, so it’s no surprise then that Guardiola has takes on when he wants his players to do it (sex)....
Alshon Jeffery Suspended Four Games For Violating PED Policy
Alshon Jeffery is not having the best year. He’s set to be a free agent this offseason, and a bounce-back season in which he returned to his 2013-14 form could have set him up for a decent payday. Unfortunately, he’s only got 630 yards and one touchdown in nine games of the season, and now he’s in ...
DeAndre Jordan Doesn't Want You To Have Any Ice Cream
NBA teams run all kinds of fun in-game promotions—free tacos if we score 100 points! Free pizza if we hit 15 threes!—but the best ones are those that allow for meta-contests between the fans and opposing players....
Trump's Transition Team Is Just Now Learning What A President Does
It’d be an understatement to say that Donald Trump isn’t exactly prepared for the task at hand. And we already know that he “didn’t want to jinx himself” with too much preparation pre-win. According to a source closely connected to the Trump transition team, though, the reality of the situation is w...
<i>SNL</i> Cold Open: Kate McKinnon, Playing Leonard Cohen's "<em></em>Hallelujah"<em></em>
Tonight’s Saturday Night Live cold open brought new meaning to the term, as longtime cast member Kate McKinnon—who, until Tuesday, presumed to be playing President Clinton for the next four years—performed a solo rendition of “Hallelujah” by Leonard Cohen, who died at 82 earlier this week....
How To Deal With Being The Only Black Man In An Office Full Of Conservatives
Have you ever been the only black man in an office full of outspoken, conservative co-workers? No? Well, let me tell you what it’s like....
Professional Tennis Player Takes Set While Serving Underhand
Mackie McDonald was up 4-3 in the first set against Peter Polansky during today’s ATP Challenger event in Knoxville, before taking an injury timeout. When he returned, he could no longer slam a strong and righteous overhead serve. So he settled for these little underhand slices. ...
Coutinho Dunked On Argentina's Head
As anyone familiar with the English Premier League or Brazil’s national team knows that Phillipe Coutinho is wont to try and bang in a long range golazo if you give him so much as an inch of space. That’s exactly what he did this evening against Argentina in a World Cup qualifier, slipping off of Ja...
Please Return Cassius Marsh's Stolen <i>Magic: The Gathering</i> Cards
I’ve never lost my Magic: The Gathering cards to anything more malicious than a sofa cushion, but I can fathom the pain Seattle Seahawks linebacker Cassius Marsh is feeling after his Land Rover was broken into on Tuesday night. What follows is a tragic sequence of events, and a translation....