pe Page 825 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

World's Saddest Goalkeeper Also Has The World's Saddest Twitter Bio
This is Steve Harper, a 39-year-old goalkeeper in his first season for Hull City after being a fixture on the Newcastle United bench for the better part of 20 years, which included stints on loan elsewhere. He is, relatively speaking, baddish at his job....

Saints Build Statue Of Man Who Tried To Move The Team
The Saints and Pelicans surprised owner Tom Benson with a 13.5-foot bronze statue outside of the Superdome, a venerable and iconic arena that nine years ago Benson tried to get declared unusable after Hurricane Katrina in an attempt to break his lease and relocate the Saints to San Antonio. ...

The Face Of Baseball
Well, this here's something nobody else thought of doing to honor Derek Jeter. The artist Kevin Champeny has built a sculpture/picture of Jeter out of 10,000+ hand cast 1/2" diameter baseballs. Ya heard? ...

U.S. Open Ballgirl Runs Down Rogue Bag
That's some good hustle. ...

Sidney Crosby Was Not Arrested In Ottawa
Preeeetty major fuckup here from the Ottawa Sun, which reported earlier this morning that Penguins star Sidney Crosby was arrested for unknown reasons. That would be a big story in the middle of the NHL offseason doldrums, if it were true, which it is not....

Wes Welker Suspended Four Games For Amphetamines (And Maybe Molly, Too)
Well, damn. According to Adam Schefter, the NFL will give Broncos wide receiver Wes Welker a four-game suspension for violating the league's performance-enhancing drug policy. Welker reportedly used amphetamines. (Update: Molly?)...

Keep It 100: We Rated Rappers On The <em>Madden</em> Scale
We had to make a rule: You can't use the Falcons. That's as close as you could get to cheating without actually cheating, because He was on the Falcons, and He was ... fast doesn't begin to describe what Michael Vick was in Madden 2004. He had a speed rating of 95, earned after a few years spent...

Is The World's Best Manager Good Enough For Bayern Munich?
On July 27th, just months after the end of Pep Guardiola's first campaign as coach of Bayern Munich—one in which his team won four titles and dominated the Bundesliga like a counselors' team in a summer camp league—Karl-Heinz Rummenigge, Bayern's chairman, did something strange. While discussing whe...

Slightly Creepy Bart Simpson Joins Russian Soccer Club
In some kind of convoluted branding exercise, Russian soccer club Zenit St. Petersburg introduced a slightly off Bart Simpson as its new player today. Synergy!...

Mariners Suspend Jesus Montero For Ice Cream Incident With Scout
Last week we told you about an incident involving Mariners catcher Jesus Montero, a heckling team scout, and a hurled ice cream sandwich. In light of what happened, the Mariners have decided to suspend Montero for the rest of the season....

Penn State And UCF Start Us Off With A Thriller
It's not easy to send a red-faced fellow named O'Leary home from Ireland unhappy. A last-second Penn State field goal did the trick this morning, though....

How To Grill A Skirt Steak, A Mere 11 Minutes Of Worthwhile Labor
Grilling skirt steak is the easiest, fastest way to get steak into multiple people at the same time. This makes it well suited to Labor Day's two traditions: the notion of a holiday from work, and the often contradictory practice of throwing a big exciting cookout on this day when you're supposed...

Bo Pelini Says Marijuana Use Is "Out Of Control" In Society
Speaking at Nebraska's "Big Red Breakfast," Cornhuskers coach Bo Pelini broached the topic of weed for some reason, and his take on marijuana use was pretty damn hot. ...

Today's shot. You may as well go read the WSJ's fun little item on tennis players refusing to use sunscreen: "Cara Black, a doubles player from Zimbabwe, said she uses a zinc cream. Ukraine's Olga Savchuk said the one lotion that doesn't bother her is available only in Japan and South Korea, so Japa...

Giants Pitcher Yusmeiro Petit Broke An MLB Record Today
Yusmeiro Petit doesn't have a spot in the Giants' rotation, but through relief appearances and one spot start, he earned some recognition today. After striking out Charlie Culberson in the third inning against the Rockies, Petit broke the MLB record for most consecutive batters retired with 46....

Report: Adrian Peterson Told Jerry Jones He Wants To Play For Dallas
In this week's ESPN The Magazine, Don Van Natta profiles Cowboys owner Jerry Jones. There's so, so much in there. It starts off with Jones dancing with Kate Bosworth, for goodness sake. But, yeah, this Adrian Peterson story is going to make some news on its own....

Shannon Sharpe: "Josh Gordon Is A Marijuana Junkie"
Shannon Sharpe was a guest co-host on this morning's episode of First Take and he had some weird things to say about Josh Gordon's year-long suspension from the NFL....

NFL Statistical Milestones That Could Be Reached This Season
With the NFL season near, here's a list of statistical achievements to watch out for courtesy of Pro Football Reference data. ...